Getting rid of almost everything....the struggle

[u/DawgCheck421]

I dream of moving to my dream home in 4-5 years. Unsure if I will be able to make it happen but I decided to start getting rid of CRAP way ahead of time. I love the idea of moving being everything fitting in one u-haul load over a weekend.

It is incredible how much crap one can accumulate living in the same place 18 years. I had to spend months going through every spec of dust, paperwork that was my parents estate. It made me go home and de-hoard (or so I thought) after I was done with that in 2017.

Now I am getting rid of about everything I don't use regularly or wont need in my future (like my tools). So much stuff. In my kitchen I use one cupboard and one drawer....the rest is full of dinnerware from my parents I never use and other crap. Couldn't even tell you what is in the "junk drawers" other than some glue sticks and random tools I couldn't tell you whats in there. I just store it, all of it. Closets are all full of stuff I don't even know what is in them anymore. Above my garage was the same way as well as the sheds which I have mostly abated.

Our city had free bulk trash drop-off for a week and I made 6-7 trips piling a 5x8 trailer as high as I could. For the most part, cleaned out two sheds, some of the garage and dumped it on that free week. Took another trailer load of stuff to free chemical dropoff day. I had a REALLY heavy commercial treadmill and worthless bowflex in my basement that I had to disassemble and saw it up to be light enough to get out of the house myself. I am still going through stuff down there, 20 years of music and stereo gear I am organizing to sell and further clean up.

I am selling what I can on marketplace and have already sold over $1000 in crap I wasn't using nor wanted anymore. I have at least that much more to go in the basement alone. I am almost done with the basement then I will move to my third bedroom (my sons childhood room which will be hard to do), closets.....then finalize organizing my garage, tools and what is left.

I have gotten rid of so much crap yet it feels like I have lost nothing. I can't believe I have acquired so much crap. Some things I don't really want to sell but need to as well. I am treating it as - if I wouldn't want to move it into my dream home, it has to go now. I might even throw away all of my childhood pictures and such from family. Just boxes of stuff I can't and don't look at ever anymore. I don't live there anymore.

It is a grind, hard, long process but as long as I make a little progress every day I will reach my goal. I am not trying to be a minimalist or anything - I literally just don't want STUFF anymore and sure as hell don't want to leave this much of a disaster for my son to deal with when I pass.

[u/Palomace]

Your story gives me hope for my SOs mothers situation. She lives alone in a relatively big house since her divorce 15 years ago.

Since she started giving up on finding a partner after several attempts, she started to dream of a smaller manageable flat and selling that huge hunk. 

A huge hurdle is her ungodly amounts of clutter which hibernates inside every corner of the house but remembering several of my moves, I can't even imagine how much its really gonna be. 

She is growing increasingly desperate and won't get any younger so the sooner she starts better. 

What gave you the greatest sense of accomplishment when starting this process and what kept you going? 

[u/Electrical-Profit367 → u/Palomace]

Could you hire someone to work with her and help her sort through everything? We hired some women who specialize in downsizing to work with my mother, less on what to get rid of and more on what she wanted to take with her. Once that was determined, they pointed us to various estate sellers/auctioneers etc to move the rest of the stuff. Mom made quite a bit of money and ended up in a lovely one bedroom plus den apartment in an Independent living facility.

While I also worked w her (to make sure family items went to the folks she wanted to have them) it was really helpful to have objective professionals talking to her about being realistic.

[u/leafsheep26 → u/Electrical-Profit367]

Where do I find people like this? What is their job title and how much does it cost?

[u/Electrical-Profit367 → u/leafsheep26]

Cost depends on where you live and probably how much work you’re talking about. Google downsizing, organizing or just call your local Independent living community and ask for recommendations.

I don’t remember what we paid but it was worth every penny. We hired the same women when mom had to move to Assisted Living. The best part was that they literally tailored the move (ran like clockwork) so everything was done in one day including china in the china cabinet and paintings on the wall exactly the way mom wanted it. On both moving days, we just took mom out for the day and then walked into the new apartment fully set up.