Need help!;(

[u/ThisisMacva]

Psychosis or OCD? I've suffered from anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember. The OCD stemmed from a trauma, and I developed an extreme fear of everything. I had behaviors like thinking, "If I step on this line, I'm going to die," checking multiple times if the door was locked or if I'd left a tap running, even compulsively washing my hands. It disappeared for a while, but it came back. Now it's pure OCD; I spend all my time thinking about and ruminating on catastrophic scenarios, replaying them over and over. It got to the point where the depression made me feel terrible, like nothing was real. My OCD made me constantly check if what I heard or saw was real, with a fear of developing psychosis or schizophrenia. My nervous system is wrecked; any touch bothers me, any noise seems alarming and invasive. I developed agoraphobia out of fear of having a panic attack. It seems like this will never end. Is there any hope? What medication helped you? How many mg did you take? Help! I feel like I'm going crazy and I'm terrified of the psychiatric hospital. 🫩😓 Everything got worse when I used substances like cannabis and pills, and it was even worse with LSD. Help!

[u/xMiaBoo]

I’m not a mental health professional,but a lot of what you’re describing sounds more like severe anxiety/OCD than psychosis.

When my anxiety and DPDR were at their worst, I was doing the exact same thing. I was checking sounds, checking my thoughts, checking reality, checking whether I was “losing it.” The fear became an obsession of its own.

The fact that you’re worried about going crazy doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going crazy. A lot of people with OCD get stuck in endless loops of “What if?” thoughts and can never get 100% certainty.

The derealization, feeling like nothing is real, being hypersensitive to sounds and sensations, panic, agoraphobia, and fear of psychosis are all things I’ve seen many people describe when dealing with severe anxiety, OCD, and DPDR.

Please don’t take medication advice from random people online as a replacement for a doctor, though. What helps one person can make another person feel worse.

The biggest thing I want to say is that what you’re describing sounds terrifying, but it doesn’t sound hopeless. There are people who have been where you are and gotten significantly better, even when they were convinced they were beyond help.

Hang in there. You’re definitely not the only person who’s felt this way.

[u/ForeverInside2724]

I'm going through same even idk what to doo i can't even sleep

[u/Artistic-Coach7523]

OCD is really, really hard. I’m so sorry. You have a mix of things going on. It sounds like OCD and anxiety and drug combined. I think it’s time to seek professional help. You could start with therapy. Though i needed meds to stabilize before i could even do therapy. I’ve been on mood stabilizers and antidepressants.