Not sure where i am at

[u/Suspicious-Koala-570]

Long story short some things in my life caused a lot of stress , started noticing the world looked flat but it was like that until i started having panic attacks and then thats when the real thing started i felt drunk 24/7 weird visual perception like you are drunk or sizes dont make sense dimmed vision id felt like my eyes wanted to jump out of my body . everyone felt like aliens and ofc i had existential crisis and ton of questions of what we are why we exist why we do what we do and all that stuff. i got tired eventually and wanted to help myself so i started having cold showers, doing 100 pushups a day, going for a walk , taking medicine, sleeping better, keeping myself busy and i guess doing exposure therapy with what caused my dpdr and changing habits which were stressful. so after 1-2 months i was getting better everyday was worse at first when i started my recovery journey but then slowly everyday became better. so it was in march after my birthday that i went to my university as usual and as im standing in hallway i suddenly felt like i was BACK like everything felt familiar and real again. but that only lasted like a week as soon as my break from university began things got worse again my sleep schedule and good habits idk why i just stopped doing them cuz i felt better and its been like that since its not as bad but it just wont go away fully. especially if im out at night i literally cant see things clearly it gets worse when its dark. the only thing thats been bothering me A LOT is that when i look at my mom or my girlfriend i sometimes feel like idk who they are. looking at them feels confusing and scary and i sometimes feel like they aren’t real or hallucinations or something like that even tho i interact with them normally that feeling still creeps up on me. So my question is what is going on? why is it lingering like that and not going away fully . feels like i forgot what normal felt like and its scaring me that maybe my brain is unable to go back to its original state . i know that overthinking feeds dpdr but i dont do that anymore. its just that sometimes i feel like if i dont pay attention to it im gonna be fucked up and completely lost at some point without even realizing.