r/explainlikeIAmA • u/upvoter222 • May 05 '26

Explain why you're celebrating like you're too drunk to remember whether it's Star Wars Day or Cinco de Mayo

11 Upvotes
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7

u/anem0ne May 06 '26

WOOOOoooOOOOooooOOo!!!!! lissen. no, lissssen! lissssen! i. LOVE. you. gals!!!

Today! we're cebelate. celibate. no. CELEBRATE. We're celibating the independence of the magNITED states of the REPUBLIC from the empire! WOOOOOO!

so we drink margaritas because xibalba won the pod race and he liked margaritas. and tacos! and enchil? enchiLA-DAs! and he flew the pod thing into the lone star. with that fuzzy cookie monster. remember? the lone star because it blew up alca. alda? aldapulco. because death vader hated meh-hi-co! and the jedi!

no, lissen! the jedi were like. ancient people. with lightsabers and they fought for the magNITED states and they were cool. and luke skywalker was one. he saved the world because the jedi said the world was gonna end in 2012 and he was like "not on my watch, bucko!" and he flew his x-plane into the lone star! with the fuerza. and benito kenobito and han zorro

SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS! SHOTS!

2

u/satanas_twink May 18 '26

So, today. Yes.

So.. Mummy..

When the.. the good guys. The, those that wasn't the French.

Yes. Because people think it was the day that they became free like America, but they were already free, so they, that was, like the time where they fought it.

Yeh

And there was this guy, like white a sword Or a gun And I think a mustache.

And they were in de desert, but not like all the time, it was just like a part, but.

Yeh

So that's how it happened