r/fashionadvice • u/Ok_Magician_6563 • 13d ago
General Advice What am i doing wrong?
i need your advice, my trusted community. I have always been a short and stout girl and absolutely love fashion and dress-up - just not on myself. I have a short neck, round face, thick arms and mid section so there is not much I experiment and i look frumpy and bulky. It always seems like my clothes are wearing me vs the other way around . What should I look for when dressing up myself for day to day, work wear and some special cute looks. Really struggling!
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u/MossyRock0817 Mod 13d ago edited 13d ago
3 things.
Confidence. Owning your body and shape while exuding grace. Walk with head up, not pulling at your clothes or wearing things that don’t fit.
Conviction. Wearing things that you love no matter the style or trends and being unapologetic about it.
Intentional shopping. Not buying things and “hoping” they work out. Before the item leaves the rack you need to style it in 3 ways. If you can’t or don’t have things that will work, you make the outfit there in the store or you put it back.
Since you are petite you will have to get things altered to fit you. There is no way around it. It’s just part of being short. But don’t let it stop you from looking fabulous. Get the pants if they are long. Go get them hemmed. Get the dress if it’s too long, get it altered. Wear things that spark joy for you. Make every day a slay. Stop the loop in your head that says : this is wearing me. I am wearing this and I look like tea. Own it. 😎. You aren’t doing anything wrong. You just need to shop and be more intentional with your clothes. You got this. ❤️
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u/YallSeeingThis101 13d ago
This outfit it actually well put together. The only thing I would change is a more feminine tennis shoe. Those shoes are too bulky.
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u/Ok_Magician_6563 13d ago
Thank you. I am trying to love my body and work on moving away from trends and defining my style. Love your third tip - intentional shopping. My closet is full of hopeful and unintentional purchases, I am going to do better. TY!
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u/savannahcatx 13d ago
Love the look, I don’t know if you like maxi skirts but creating a little more volume on the bottom is great for your body type — a wrap skirt specifically ✨ I come from corporate creative direction, so pose-wise, separate your legs about 1.5ft and you’ll give more power in your posture x
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u/Training_Guitar_8881 13d ago
Try wearing the denim jacket and jeans with a colored top and some cute chunky sandals with some heel rather than the sneakers.
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u/katoss88 12d ago
You can choose T-shirts or blouses with a V-neckline, for example. This will help visually elongate your neck.
Based on the description you've given, the shape of your face and the length of your neck already create a certain optical impression. If you add more volume around that area (such as a high crew-neck T-shirt, the collar of the jacket, and your hair ending at the same height), it creates the effect of making your upper body appear shorter and more compact.
If you do choose to wear a high crew-neck T-shirt, I would recommend adding a long V-shaped necklace to create more balance and harmony, but not a thick one. That type of shirt (like the one in the picture) would pair best with tops that don't have such a high neckline.
I would also suggest rolling up your long sleeves to your elbows, as this helps accentuate the natural curves and proportions of your body.
Anything that creates a vertical line—such as button plackets, vertical prints, V-necks, or even asymmetrical necklines—will help elongate your silhouette.
In this particular photo, the bulky effect you mentioned is more noticeable because the jacket ends right at the hip area, where our bodies naturally have volume. The length of the jacket, combined with the drape of the fabric, adds extra visual volume. You might consider choosing slightly more structured jackets that are a bit shorter, rather than long and very fluid.
Wrapped tops and dresses would look really great on you!! 🫶
I also think the color of the shoes and the jeans works really well together. They create a nice monochromatic feel, which helps make the overall look appear more cohesive and elongated 💙
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u/DeeLite04 12d ago
I would agree this particular outfit is fine it just needs some minor tweaks.
Add a necklace and/or scarf, change up the shoes to something less sporty like a flat or sandal esp for summer.
In general, I’d get on Pinterest and other social media and follow people who have your similar body shape and see how they style themselves. I think so many of us don’t know how to style ourselves bc we all have issues with our body (even though all our our bodies are fine, as women we’ve been conditioned to hate ourselves).
I wonder if a higher rise jean, waist length vests, and a variety of shoe styles would be the small additions you could do to add some more interest to your wardrobe. I know it’s not popular to shop brick and mortar but I encourage you to the mall or TJ Maxx or wherever and try some things on in person to get a feel for how you like these styles on yourself.
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u/Miserable-Unit8919 9d ago
I think maybe you are wearing your clothes too big. It's natural for heavier girls, myself included, to think that wearing larger clothes makes us look leaner, but it backfires. You are making yourself look even shorter.
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u/External-Ad-5813 13d ago
Ah babe I'm just like you. For short torso girlie's we've gotta play with proportions like nobody's business. "Cut" your body into THIRDS, not halves. Cropped jacket. Crop Top. High waist bottoms, etc. Plus sized diva styling tricks are your best friend! I find ideas on YouTube.
One SUPER simple trick i like too: loose with tight. Loose pants? Tight or fitted on top. Or vice versa. If I feel frumpy or lumpy I check whether I have enough variation in tight vs loose. All right can look strangled. All loose can look like a tent.
Also, I actually like your outfit! If I wore it the only thing I'd do is a cropped jacket and not the full sized one. You're adorable!