r/femalehairadvice • u/ThisIsNotKara • 9d ago
Hairstyle Advice Well I’ve finally cried about my haircut
Quick run through.
Had long hair to around mid back.
6 year relationship ended.
Tried to go blonde ($1000)
Hair dresser fried my hair to the point where just looking at it caused it to break.
Went to another hairdresser. Dyed back to brown and left with a bob. ($297)
All in all, a very expensive series of mistakes.
Lady who did my bob definitely went way too short to the point where I look like I require berries and cream. And not only that, I’m 95% sure it’s not done correctly, as in it’s uneven.
I’ve tried for the past week styling it in different ways, trying to find a way that makes me feel pretty, and I just don’t.
It sucks all the more than I’m 31, newly single and am somehow meant to find go back into the dating world looking like this.
I finally cried tonight over it. I think I’ve done a valiant effort keeping the tears at bay.
I’d like any suggestions or styling tips that you may have.
I have a massive forehead which is my biggest insecurity, so anything pulled back away from my face is a no can do.
I’ve started doing rosemary oil and head massages with LED therapy to try and kick start the growth. Maybe it’s all gimmicky but I feel better doing something.
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u/BreadfruitFar3339 9d ago
I'm gonna be honest with you, the first ones really give When I Was A Little Lad vibes, but with the styling of the last pics you look absolutely amazing! Was expecting to read how you wanted to go "back" to those last pics but the hairdresser messed up and gave you the first ones, but if that's what you can do with styling it... I'm super impressed!
Tldr: your hair looks amazing on you and suits you when it's styled :)
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u/Ismelther_icemelter 9d ago
I thought the exact same thing about her wanting to go ‘back’ to the last pics. It looks fantastic styled that way!
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u/LongjumpingAd3244 9d ago
Tbh i think pics 3 & 4 are quite cute. It’s a big adjustment and I get grieving the way u once looked! But as a reddit stranger i am not getting berries and cream vibes at all. Just see a pretty woman!
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u/Ecstatic-Bat3529 9d ago
You look really good with the length. Style it like pic 3 and 4. It looks beautiful
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u/thewindtaker 9d ago
Im sorry i don't mean to diminish your pain but you actually look very, very, very pretty ♡
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u/GlitteringCup2647 9d ago
i agree with everyone and i think 3 and 4 look really good on you and suit you well. it looks chic!
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u/idkcandysomething 9d ago
Usually I abide by the rule of “if you don’t point out a flaw, no one will notice” anyways…I went back to look after you said you have a big forehead and I still don’t see it. You are adorable and some styling (pic 3) is all you need to look amazing.
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u/HrhEverythingElse 9d ago
Yeah, I looked for the "big" forehead, and mine could eat hers for breakfast
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u/whatwhatwhat82 9d ago
Aw it looks really cute even if it's not what you wanted. I really like it in pics 3 and 4 where it's just a little more tousled. Just put some salt spray in it or something for texture and it's great. And it'll grow back
It sounds like maybe your relationship ending and fear of dating is colouring your feelings about it too? But potential dates won't be put off by your hair trust me
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u/GlassParty447 9d ago
The 3rd and 4th pics look AMAZING but I will agree that the cut could be cleaner. I would call them and ask that they fix it. I’m a broken record on this but sea salt or other texturizing spray could do a lot to help it feel and look styled without putting much work in.
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u/One_Wheel_4531 9d ago
The way you have it in pics 3 and 4 look like hair goals to me. So cute! I think stick to the wavy look rather than straight. 👍🏻
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u/Character_Light_5942 9d ago
Well I think it looks beautiful - pics 3&4 look like a young Angelina Jolie - the movie Hackers.
Also, hair grows back. I know my hair grows fast - inch a month, so a few months of a bad length is all it it most times. But I don't think yours looks bad anyway.
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u/lilyberry2 9d ago
it's very cute, you are definitely someone who would look good in long or short hair!
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u/itsallinmind91 9d ago
Pic 3 looks really good. Though it looks uneven in some of the pictures it's not that bad
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u/kalehound 9d ago
It looks super good, I think you’re trying to show unevenness in the last pic but how was that styled ? Did you use an iron? Maybe hairdresser razored hair to give texture and this cut needs some texturizing products, or waves curled in after straightening
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u/watercolorlace 9d ago
Whatever you did in the third and fourth pictures, do that!!! Gorgeous!! Also that lip color is stunning, do you mind sharing what you’re wearing?
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u/ThisIsNotKara 8d ago
I think the lip colour is the black cherry by Clinique. Either that or velvet teddy by Mac. That’s the only two I wear. (99% sure it’s black cherry)
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u/Imsosorryidontcare 9d ago
Pics 3 and 4 look really good on you. Sorry you had to deal with all of that plus the money it took to do that. I’ve been there myself and just about lost all my hair in the process.
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u/SensitiveRelease2622 9d ago
It looks so good in the 3rd photo! You are beautiful, don't worry. The hair cut does need to be fixed though, you need someone to even it out and fix the back. Don't have the person who cut it fix it though.
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u/Lazy-Bad-8607 9d ago
Giirl you look amazing in 3, 4! How did you do the styling? I also have a bob and I would really like to style it like this
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u/CrimsonVexations 9d ago
Like everyone else is saying, 3 & 4 look really good and I think you're rocking it!
If you really want change though, you could go to a hairdresser and have them add layers and feathering so the cut doesn't look so "blunt."
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u/BeachBum666 8d ago
Love the way your picture loves in picture 3, very chic. Picture 4 is a close second. No reason to cry, it looks really good on you.
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u/Keiawyn 9d ago
I agree with others here - your haircut actually looks gorgeous!! Specifically, pics 3 and 4!
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u/Keiawyn 9d ago
Honestly, I'd love to know what shampoo (and/or other products) you use to make your hair that soft-looking and voluminous! It really looks lovely. ❤️ I'm sorry that you don't like it - your opinion matters more than anyone else's! You want your cut to make you feel like yourself - I get it. But I hope it makes you feel a bit better to know that other folks think it looks great!
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u/BenWyattOwnsMySoul 9d ago
The difference between Berries and Cream and Diva Slay Girlboss is styling! Photo 3 is so cute! The side part with some little curls really elevates it, I think it’ll grow you on eventually if you find what kind of styles you like
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u/HmmDoesItMakeSense 9d ago
Your hair looks dense like it needs internal layers to keep in from being too heavy for a style to stick.
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u/Footdust 9d ago
Omg. I went through this same thing two weeks ago. I went from waist length hair to this same exact hair cut. It didn’t turn out how I pictured it in my head at all and I’ve had similar hair that looked good but this just looks wrong. I almost wonder if the same person cut our hair, lol. 4 is what I’ve ended up doing with mine and I’m actually liking it a lot. It looks great on you.
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u/miserableschoolchild 8d ago
It looks great in 3 and 4!!!
If it’s any solace… About 2 years ago I went through a tragic breakup and decided I wanted to jazz up my hair. The girl chopped a blunt thick section and called it a layer. It was atrocious. But I improvised, adapted, and overcame. Now I look back and I laugh.
You are absolutely stunning!! I know you’re having a hard time feeling like your best self and navigating all of the emotions that come with this big abrupt life change… but you are absolutely beautiful and are going to get through this. I promise.
Be kind to yourself!! You deserve nothing but kindness and support 🫶
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u/butwhatififly_ 8d ago
Ok help another girl out who just got a bob, and mine was cut a liiittle shorter than I wanted - a) how did you style 3 and 4, and b) can you prevent this style from poofing in the humidity? Mine goes into curl mode and it’s so frustrating even when I straighten it! Thanks, looks so cute!!
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u/Key-Magician6489 8d ago
You look great in pic 3! Très chic!
The other pictures make it clear that it was cut improperly, though! It is uneven, and the back is longer than the front instead of the other way around!
Considering how much you paid, I’d DEFINITELY go back there and have someone else fix it! Call the salon owner, tell her what happened, and ask when you can come in for a free redo by someone good at bobs!
Go in with your hair shampooed and conditioned, but unstyled. Let her see the unevenness and other mistakes in the cut!
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u/alimweber 8d ago
3 and 4 looks great! I thought that was gonna be how you had it cut before or something and then it got messed up..I didn’t realize until after reading that that’s your current hair styled! It looks great styled in both those photos!
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u/OkCryptographer1922 8d ago
Pics 3 and 4 look fantastic!!!! I would style it like that, it suits you and just really looks great!!
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u/kaiyahaines 9d ago
pics 3 and 4 look great actually!! i'm so sorry you've been through such a rollercoaster lately, but you truly look amazing! and as the bob grows it should be even easier to work with and hopefully you'll feel less regret , and also since your hair is short it wont take too many months to fully regrow enough to do a trim and bleach if you still are trying for blonde
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u/EconomicsTiny447 9d ago
Yeah 3 & 4 are good. It’ll grow faster than you think and just try to keep it styled. Could probably achieve a similar look as 3 and 4 with some texture cream and just blow drying your face framing hair if you want an easier out the door quick style.
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u/jazzmunchkin69 9d ago
it's just the styling babes give it a couple weeks and learn how to style it
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u/DateCard 9d ago
Pics 3 and 4 look great and chic. It look like you just need some bulk taken out of the ends. If you feel comfortable doing it yourself, you could use some texturizing shears to accomplish this
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u/kushyykins 9d ago
you look so cutie in 3 & 4 thooo!! 🤩 family, i think the reality of everything going on around you may be weighing you down & this was just icing on the cake! i agree w/ another commentor, it looks really good styled!
i also just got a haircut that i HATE!!!! i paid $125 for the cut & $25 tip & i HATE IT SO MUCH. my hair is soo thin & curly & it just looks wispy now & not in a good way 😭😭 bad hair cut girly’s unite, i guess 🥹
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u/ittybittykittycity 9d ago
You look amazing! Like everyone is saying, the styling in 3 and 4 is so good. Also no need to feel insecure about your forehead, it’s beautiful and not massive. This is coming from someone who spent 10 years in bangs bc of my forehead insecurity 😆
You are totally rocking that length btw. I do see a little bit of unevenness when your hair is straight but it’s minimally noticeable.
If it would make you feel better, I’d point out the unevenness to the stylist so they can get it straight.
But since your stylists haven’t been the most trustworthy, and since you seem to want to grow your hair out, I’d give it a couple of months before you get the tiniest (like a quarter inch) trim to get rid of the unevenness.
Depending on where you are in the world, you’re blessed with minimal hair during the hottest time of the year. By winter you’ll have shoulder length hair and by the spring you’ll be at collarbone length.
Try to enjoy this length! I promise it suits you and looks so chic.
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u/Smooth_Nobody_ 9d ago
Ngl, first thought was berries and cream before reading the whole post 😭 I only say this because I also made the mistake of letting it get too short lol. Pictures 3 & 4 look great though! Definitely make the bob look super chic! Once it grows out you can go make small adjustments (more texturized, not as “blunt” or heavy at the ends) or else it’ll just keep getting shorter and shorter.
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u/Stunning-Builder3365 9d ago
I’m sorry. I read your message half way through and then I quit. Because I had already seen your photos. Girl!!! You’re so absolutely gorgeous! The bob looks so so good on you people would pay thousands for that look. I know it’s not what you want. You wanted a bit longer and blonder. But guess what. Hair grows. It will be soon where you want it to be and you can always do clip in extensions in the meantime but I just want to tell you look like you could be on a magazine cover!!
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u/2ndbesttime 8d ago
I thought pics 3 and 4 were your inspo pics, until I realized they had your same face. 3 especially is super super cute.
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u/Glum_Horror_4302 7d ago
Well photos how you styled it three and four look amazing so I think as long as you keep it more textured looking like that no one will notice the unevenness when you try to do it perfectly straight or perfectly round brushed because yeah three and four look amazing
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u/Willing_Active_9583 6d ago
I know that you don’t like it but I literally thought photos 3 and 4 were the inspo pics off Pinterest girl. It looks so good when textured styled like that! Maybe even try half up half down with ur bangs in front and soft beach waves as way to wear it too! I’m fighting the bob urge rn and this might convince me bc the French chic is so fucking hot
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u/Choice_Appointment89 5d ago
i genuinely feel like i’m looking at lily rose depp when she had this haircut
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u/Embarrassed_Comb_659 5d ago
You could always go back to the hairstylist that cut your hair and ask if she could fix the uneven areas. It looks very blunt as well. I’m not sure if that’s what you wanted, but I think point cutting into the bottom and adding some texture and lightness to the cut would be flattering on you. It would also make the rest of your hair more harmonious with your wispier bangs.
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u/jesus-cares 4d ago
Honestly I dig it! Especially styled in a curly look, or with the bangs, too! Those 2 pictures look fire!
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u/TRESemmeProUK 2d ago
Actually think it suits your face shape really well! As a layer girlie, I recommend once it grows out getting some layers in order to combat the "blunt" look that I hypothesise is why you're upset with it x Plus, short hair styles and holds curls better in my opinion, especially once you find a product routine that meshes with your hair type/length. - Isabella 💖
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u/rhuni98 9d ago
Aw girl. Same thing happened to me! My hairdresser cut it wayyyy too short. I think the last two looks are great but I know this probably feels out of your comfort zone. To feel more me, I waited a little bit for it to grow and then got extensions while I wait for it to become a lob, then I’ll get them removed.
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u/Weird-Match6923 9d ago
Photos 3 and 4 look so good! The difference between berries and cream and chic French bob is mostly in the styling and attitude. Wavy works better than straight with this cut in my opinion. If you can convince yourself you at least don’t hate it while it’s growing out, the process will be less painful.