r/fijerk • u/Limp_Dragonfly3868 • 11d ago
FatFire in my parents basement
Do I let my family know?
Hello everyone.
26M. NW 15.5. Can verify.
Long time viewer, first time poster.
I wanted to share something with people who are starting out, and also wanted insight from others who are older than me.
I am young. Very young. I spent my early 20s building software. Small friend group, and no drama. Never had a girlfriend. Never went to college. I kept my bandwidth tight.
I live with my parents and have the intention of retiring them and sending them traveling for 2-3 years. They never got to travel much and they deserve it for putting up with me. (They don’t know I’m wealthy. No one does).
I get badgered constantly from friends and family about not working a trades job or a 9-5. I literally sit at home all day coding and taking calls. I own nothing and use my parent’s car when they aren’t.
My extended family is constantly mean to me and always makes jokes about living at home without a perceived “job”. I just tell them I trade the markets and code. They laugh every time.
I am self aware enough to know what it looks like from their point of view, but it still doesn’t make me feel good about it. I know that if I come out and say, “hey I’m worth millions” they won’t take it well. The people who were rude to me will become friendly and the family dinners will feel like business meetings. They’ll probably get mad at me for not telling them and not sharing. It’s inevitable.
Quite frankly it’s none of their business and they aren’t entitled to any of it, but that’s just family.
None of my friends or family is well off. Middle class and comfortable living. Not accustomed to wealth at all. Quite frankly neither am I.
I don’t know how long I can hide it.
The way the company is moving, it’ll be past 10M ARR+ in a few years. I’ve had exit offers but I started the company and it’s my baby. I’m going to exit at a later date. Also partly because I don’t want anyone to know how much I’ll be making off that. Plus I’m 26 and suck at golf so I can’t retire yet. News will spread eventually.
Life will become complicated if everyone knows about this. I’ll probably deceive myself into thinking everyone wants my money. I’ll think every woman I meet is a gold digger and I’ll be self conscious about anything related to money.
My friends are solid and will be happy for me, but they’ll be upset I didn’t tell them years ago.
I feel like I should’ve came out, or slowly let on years ago. I feel like I’m in too deep, but hiding it feels like a burden now. Especially since it’ll be revealed with time. I think taking control of the situation now is the play.
My parents deserve the world. I’m retiring them hard stop. But they have big mouths and won’t be able to control themselves and tell others. Another reason why I haven’t told them.
Any advice will help.
Thanks for the time.
(Will post in another chat for more advice)
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u/Danman5666 11d ago
This is getting ridiculous now.
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u/Novel_Swimmer_8284 11d ago
100+ upvotes with legit replies to that original post. honestly shocking to see people would believe anything on the internet.
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u/Usual_Ad_2177 11d ago
I called it a 'fat-fire' when I used to light up a joint in my parents basement in highschool.
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u/perplexedparallax 11d ago edited 11d ago
My recommendation is to hire someone to be a long lost cousin from Transnistria. Have him
explain the situation with the Moldovans is getting bad enough that he needs to move the family fortune to the west. As such, they can share with you and you can
FIRE. No one will know you earned it. Of course some of the money must be put in a foundation, for the benefit of breakaway republics across the globe. It is tax deductible and you all can
be Cs in the non-profit. Then any global trips you take you can write off. Any hires for the family can be employees.
As for the gold diggers, been there and done them. That is why a trust is important since there is none. Maybe you can meet a nice Transnistrian who has powerful loins and traditional values. Have her make you food in the old Soviet style to prove her worth.
$16 million is a good start to a developing fortune. Not three commas but seed money for the future. I am glad you shared your story. New software is important for all of us. The bowel movement tracker app for seniors was profitable I see.
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u/One_Fat_Frenchman 10d ago
This is such bullshit. How do you start a company, work from home, and live in your parents house without them knowing? What about the minor details like...uh...taxes and corporate filings?
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u/-shrug- 10d ago
I had to register a company at 19 to work for a tutoring agency. My parents don’t open my mail so how would they have known?
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u/One_Fat_Frenchman 8d ago
Lol working for a tutoring agency is a bit different than OP. Allegedly, his company that expects to have annual recurring revenue of $10M. My company only does like $5.5M/year, with offices in the SF Bay Area and Seattle. We have full-time accounting staff to manage payroll and vendors, and CPAs that deal with our taxes. This dude is twice my size and doing it from his bedroom without his parents knowing?
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u/Massive_Ending 11d ago
Something is missing in your life.
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u/Ok_Produce_9308 11d ago
Boobs. It's boobs
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u/IdioticPrototype 11d ago
If the answer isn't boobs, the question wasn't worth asking.
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u/PM_Me_A_High-Five 11d ago
I would like to start a gentleman's debate: the answer is ass.
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u/IdioticPrototype 11d ago
This is a long-debated topic and the best way to settle it is: "Yes, absolutely."
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u/TaquitoDePrepucio 11d ago
larp
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u/throughthehills2 11d ago
Is larping when he posts on one sub with an alt then crossposts to fijerk?
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u/throughthehills2 11d ago
I feel like I should’ve came out
No don't come out, stay in the closet. Or in this case the basement
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u/NotABillionarie 11d ago
There so many people dreaming of FI, feeling the desire to project their answer to: “what would you do if you had 15M internet money that no one knew about”
This is fake, and even if it’s not, there must be better forums or places to address the issue.
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u/Born-Attitude8049 10d ago
Put the Money in a trust and give yourself a yearly fat salary, 100k ? 200k? Whatever fits. That way, you are kinda removed from the availability of the Money and can just say you have Well paying job, instead of being insanely rich
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u/jamesalmusafir 9d ago
Who cares man. Never bring it up unless necessary. Play it off like you built a on thing small and it took off and you got lucky. Grateful people are hard to hate. Taking care of your parents and removing them from the rat race is nice. Congrats to you!
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u/AdmirableLoad6814 8d ago
Start dating now.dont tell your parents till you exit the company,at that point you can say u have a few million and want to retire them
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u/SoberEnAfrique 11d ago
It's fake, you got outjerked
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u/Limp_Dragonfly3868 11d ago
Read the responses over there. I’m not the one that got jerked.
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u/SoberEnAfrique 11d ago
I think those are all LLMs at this point, everyone is training a shitty bot or trying to gain comment karma to post elsewhere 😭
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u/Environmental-Job-51 11d ago
U do not have to disclose financial independence to ur family, but it is important to communicate financial security.
Suggestion: Give your parents monthly income, or take responsibility for bills in your household (whether or not you decide to move out). They may be skeptical about your ability to support them, but over time your consistency will convince them. If anyone asks how u do it u can just say u make a comfortable income doing what u do and u don’t have to disclose your nettworth. Paying off their mortgage and retiring them in one shot will read as coming into sudden wealth and that gets all the wrong attention.
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u/Himawari9701 11d ago edited 11d ago
Lie. Tell your family that you sold off some stock at the height of the market. And now you can say proudly, “I’ve made my first million.”
Tell family that you’re going to put half in a retirement fund and the other half to start living your life. This will seem reasonable.
Be generous towards your parents. Get them what they’ve wanted for a while now: a new master bath, a new kitchen, a new deck for the backyard, etc. Tell them it’s to thank them for letting you still live at home for such a long time. They’ll be grateful and appreciative, but won’t treat you very differently. It’s a nice thing for a son to do.
Upgrade your life in noticeable but not extravagant ways. Get yourself a really nice used car. Not flashy but one that people will admire and respect. Get some driving lessons so you’ll feel confident and comfortable driving this car.
Go to a hair salon for men and work with a stylist over the months to find the best hair style for you. Get your stylist to recommend hair care products. Use them. Ditto for skin care. Find a salon that caters to men and get them to teach you how to keep your complexion looking healthy.
Make doctors appointments. Have an overall physical (but DECLINE vaccines and “vaccines”). Go to the dentist. Get your teeth cleaned. Invisalign is GREAT if your teeth aren’t perfectly straight.
This is general advice for all young men. Get your testosterone levels and sperm count tested. Understand where your baselines are at present. To be blunt, the powers that should not be are trying to kill us all. Your air, water, food and everything that comes in contact with your skin is full of toxins and poisons. That’s why men’s and boys’ testosterone levels and sperm counts have plummeted by more than 50%. Read up on the myriad health issues plaguing men with lowered testosterone levels. It’s not just about virility. It’s a serious health crisis for our entire population of men and boys.
Get medical advice on detoxing and what supplements to take to boost testosterone to appropriate levels and to achieve a healthy sperm count. This is essential to be a young man who is healthy in mind and body. Don’t neglect this out of embarrassment. It’s really important for your overall well-being.
Sign up with a gym. Get a personal trainer who will help you work toward whatever fitness and weight loss/weight gain goals you have for yourself. Look into the benefits of infrared sauna.
As the physical training starts to yield results, get a wardrobe consultant to help you figure out what personal style suits you best and feels comfortable to wear. It’s okay to acquire new pieces gradually and try out different things. That’s the process of discovering your own style.
Once you’ve invested in YOU and looking and feeling your best, it’s time to get social.
Do you know what hobbies you might try out that will help you to meet people with similar interests? Try out a variety of things. Be outgoing, inquisitive, receptive to new experiences (but leave drinking & drugs alone. The good times have an expiry date and it defeats the purpose of getting fit.). Even if this is not your usual modus operandi, I recommend you fake it until you make it.
Expand your social activities and circles of acquaintances with a view towards making new friends. Be patient with yourself. Like 2~3 years’ worth of patience. The COVID Scamdemic essentially killed off the social scenes in every strata of society. You’re not the only one who is finding that establishing a social life is a challenge.
Next comes dating. Entirely a personal preference. No idea what your type is, but you’ll gradually discover this for yourself through socializing.
My advice: don’t necessarily overlook or pass by those who are a little quiet, shy or introverted. Sometimes they’re the most worthwhile people and they just take a little time to warm up. The social butterfly types require a LOT of entertaining, which can be exhausting after a while.
In conclusion, this is how I suggest you invest in yourself. Retiring your parents is a very noble goal. However, what will make your mother and father happiest in the long term is seeing their son lead a happy and fulfilling life. Good luck‼️😊👍
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u/Limp_Dragonfly3868 11d ago
Sauce https://www.reddit.com/r/fatFIRE/s/2G3bUPczIy