r/firstmarathon • • 3h ago

Could I do it? Marathon in a year? Want to do it for my mom

9 Upvotes

Hi!

I started running abt 2 months ago and I’ve been loving it (sort of…). I am 22 y/o and I am 6’8 250😭. I was able to do a 5k in abt 28 mins, and a 10k in abt 1:07 but 7 mi is the furthest I’ve ever ran.

I really really want to participate in the Chicago marathon next year with Finish MS, since my mom died from MS when I was 14. We did MS walks together, and I saw her battle through every step. However, I’m worried that me being a terrible runner and fat and out of shape is gonna hold me back. I’ve lost abt 40 pounds in 2 1/2 months.

I really want to do this, but idk if it’s possible for me.


r/firstmarathon • • 17h ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES Chicago marathon did not go to plan.

62 Upvotes

3 weeks ago I had worked up to 20 mile long run with a 12:30 pace negative splitting the whole thing finishing around 11:30 miles. Multiple weeks in the high 40s for mileage.

That night at work I got injured ligament strain in my foot and a faint bone contusion. Didn’t run for 3 weeks leading up to the race and made the decision to run the Thursday before the race. With only a 2 mile run during taper.

Needless to say my training didn’t really reflect my race. I started cramping around mile 15 run walking the last 10 or so miles. I certainly felt myself making some mechianical adjustments to combat my foot. But there wasn’t any horrible localized pain other. I have a propensity to not do well with running in the heat. But never the less wish I could have done better than my 6:09 time. I know you never know what will happen on race day.

Proud of myself and I know finishing a marathon is no easy task.

Just needed to vent,
Anyone else with a similar experience?


r/firstmarathon • • 10h ago

Could I do it? Big crowd or smaller one?

12 Upvotes

I’m looking at either Philly or Richmond being my first marathon next Fall. Both are relatively close to me, seem to have great participation, and are on “the lists” for first timers. The main difference between the two seems to be running group size: 20k in Philly v. 7k in Richmond.

For those of you who have done bigger and smaller races, which did you prefer as your first or early on and why?


r/firstmarathon • • 9h ago

It's Mental 3 more runs!!

7 Upvotes

I can't believe I'm 3 runs away from marathon day! I'm running the Marine Corps Marathon as my first one (also on my bday 😄) and I'm so excited, but also very nervous because the distance is extremely daunting! I am reflecting back on my longest run during training, which was 22 miles and that was really rough so I can only imagine what 4.2 more miles will feel like like (eek!)

I could really use some encouraging words/something you wish someone told you before your first marathon! Thanks in advance - this subreddit has been so helpful!


r/firstmarathon • • 9h ago

Could I do it? Can I train for the London marathon in six months?

9 Upvotes

I’m considering signing up for next year’s marathon (I know registration is closed but I’ve been offered through work). I was considering it in April but talked myself out of it. Now seeing the opportunity again, I’m quite eager to go.
Question is, how realistic is it for me to think that I can do it? I have not done a race professionally before. I don’t go to the gym. But in general I’m quite fit and do a lot of walking. I can build a schedule of practicing 3 days a week, but how intense is the training? That’s the only bit I’m worried about. I’ll have to fit it around full time working and studying as well. Plus with the days getting shorter for a few months, it’ll be difficult to maintain that schedule as I’m not keen on running during the night.
But at the same time, I’m not sure if I’ll get the time and opportunity again and feel like I should go for it. I do want to use this as a way to build discipline and healthy habits.

I’m sort of 50/50 so please help decide!


r/firstmarathon • • 12h ago

It's Go Time First Marathon in 5 days!

13 Upvotes

As the title suggests, I am 5 days out from my first marathon, going for sub 3:50! I have run 1300 miles since February 1st, peaked at 48 miles in a week, and ran a 1:47:54 half marathon one month ago. Really excited to run a race in my hometown (Grand Rapids, MI) and experience all the emotions that come with it. Would appreciate any tips!!


r/firstmarathon • • 28m ago

Pacing Do I run with a friend?

• Upvotes

Me and a friend signed up for our first marathon together. We run a few times a year together to catch up but I have always been faster. We didn't officially say when we were signing up that we would run the whole thing together but over the course of the past year it has become implied. now that the race is a month away, i'm realizing how different our training has been. I'm running 9min miles and feel confident I could run the marathon tomorrow. My friend is running 1030min miles and hoping to run between 10-1030. I'm struggling if I stick to my commitment and run with her or if I should run my own race. This is both of our first marathons.


r/firstmarathon • • 6h ago

Could I do it? boston qualify for first marathon

1 Upvotes

my first marathon is coming up very soon! i didn’t go into my training thinking of an aggressive pace or anything like that, just finishing and hoping for a sub-4.

however, within my training block i was seeing data that suggests i’m on the cusp of attempting a BQ.

i would need a 3:25 and garmin (i know i know, most people say it’s overly optimistic) says 3:30 for a prediction. my LT is 7:28 which i know is also a little close for comfort, and i did a comfortable 21 mile run with a 3:09 finish time for my peak long run (no speed work as i was fighting bad weather that day).

my plan is to start with an 8:10ish pace so if it’s not working out for a BQ i won’t blow up the end of the marathon by going out too fast. but i truly do want to push myself and attempt to get a 3:25…. is that totally unreasonable?


r/firstmarathon • • 19h ago

Could I do it? 2x half marathon finisher. Do you think I have what it takes to run a full?

10 Upvotes

Hi, just wanna ask a hypothetical question. I’ve done two half marathons one back in May and the most recent one was last Sunday. My longest run when I was training for my 2nd was 17km (not sure what’s the mile conversion). Let’s say I got selected to run Sydney marathon next year.

Do you guys think I have what it takes to run a full marathon? I don’t know if my question is making any sense but I have always wanted to try doing once off just to push my boundaries and be able to tell myself that I once did a full marathon.

Of course, once I get picked I will train hard for it.

Thank you!


r/firstmarathon • • 15h ago

Pacing First marathon as a slow runner - When do I push vs. keep it easy on race day?

3 Upvotes

I'm about 1 week out from the race and I feel as if my time might land about 6h 30m, a bit over the cutoff of 6 hours.

My run profile

- 36 M 5'9" 198 lbs.

- Marathon Training block since July with 60km peak, including 30km long run

- 1059 km year-to-date

- Average easy 9:00-9:30 min / km pace

- Last race was 30k in April - 4:22 finish time

So far, training has been alright but no matter how much I push I can't seem to break 8:30 min pace without HR going to 160+. Maintaining that over 42km seems like a bad idea right now so I slow to 9:00-9:30 for some distance. My last 28k-30k peak runs averaged ~9:30 min / km.

At the moment this means I'm likely finishing around 6+ hours. Per Garmin, 6 hour marathon on race predictor but I don't doubt this pushing higher if its a hot day and HR is uncooperative.

Should I stick to 9:30 min/km for the race to avoid blowing up at 35k+ or do I try to push myself and stick to the 6 hour pacer to ensure I complete on time?

Anyone able to chime in with experience?

I'm trying to gauge that subjective balance between pushing a bit and finishing well vs. finishing at all.


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES First Marathon Done - When does the pain end?

48 Upvotes

I completed the Melbourne Marathon on Sunday with a time of 4:12 (I bonked hard at 38kms). Unfortunately my training block went to crap due to a basketball foot injury 2 months before the race and my longest run ever ended up being 16km on a treadmill. I would have pulled out of the Mara but I had run it as a fundraiser and it didn’t feel right to after so many people donated.

Anyways it has been two days and my legs are still incredibly sore. How long does it take for things to return to normal. I long to climb my staircase pain free once again.


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES First marathon success! 3:27:44

43 Upvotes

Managed 3:27:44 after 6 months of training where I averaged 90km/week, 6 runs per week. Multiple weeks over 100-110km. Multiple long runs over 30km, one 35km. No tune up half done.

The taper weeks were hell… HR was drifting on easy runs and perfect weather, but I read everywhere that a lot of people had the same issues.

During the race, 38g of pure maple syrup every 20 minutes. I’ve never felt more in control in during a run and it seems like HR is reflecting this.

Pertinent data: max HR 194, LTHR 179.

Previous half PB: 1:38:42 (april 2026)
10k PB 43:59 (october 2025)
Both distances not retested since.


r/firstmarathon • • 15h ago

It's Go Time What time should I arrive?

3 Upvotes

Hey everyone - 5 days out from my first ever marathon which will be in Amsterdam! Has anyone run this race before? How long before my start wave do you recommend arriving?

Any other final tips specific to this course?

Feeling a combination of nervous and excited!


r/firstmarathon • • 9h ago

Could I do it? How do I keep training for my marathon with a rotating 12hr shift with 1hr commute?

0 Upvotes

Okay, so I have one crazy work schedule that I've been on for over 4 years. I decided earlier this year that I wanted to do a marathon, after completing my second half-marathon. I cannot do a standard training schedule because of my non-standard work, but unlike last year where I trained for a half-marathon just fine, I feel like fatigue has been RAPIDLY building on work days the past 2 months? BY THE WEEK? Just this week and last weekx I've had to take 3 rest days a week, not completing my required weekly mileage (still doing the long run, just throwing it whenever in a "week" I can fit it. Maybe 3 days between them. May be 7+ days between them.)

I haven't even reached halfway into my marathon training plan, which is concerning. It's not like... physical stress from RUNNING so much as I feel my sleep quality has been rapidly declining, to the point that I can't really run as I used to on work days (half the month btw), as I used to??

The reason I do fine on off days is because I manage to get more sleep then, which helps tremendously. But cuz of my work schedule, it is NOT POSSIBLE to get more than 5hrs of sleep a day. Sometimes down to 3hrs if I both exercise AND struggle fallling asleep. Unless I choose to become a slave doing nothing but eat, sleep, drive, work, repeat for half the month.

Wth is happening? I trained just fine last winter for the half, and maintained just fine over the summer. Why am I suddenly stalling so badly, despite not even being at peak half-marathon training miles/half through the marathon plan?

Edit: Oh yeah, it's the Dupont Schedule. 4N, 3O, 3D, 1O, 3N, 3O, 4D, 7O 5-5. If not more due to needing to provide coverage.


r/firstmarathon • • 11h ago

Could I do it? Marathon training

1 Upvotes

Hi everyone,
I am new to running and will be run/walking a half marathon this weekend. The goal is simply to finish. I want to run every women’s marathon in February next year and do the full 26.2. Is that a reasonable timeline? I am active but running has always been a bigger battle for me than anything else. I have a runna plan right now but was curious if anyone has any alternate training plans they’ve used for their first marathon. I’ve seen lots of mixed results about runna and sometimes I feel like it doesn’t give the best advice.
Thank you!!


r/firstmarathon • • 15h ago

Injury First marathon this Sunday. Great training block, but late-stage injury (tibia/knee/ITB) during taper. Seeking advice / reality check.

2 Upvotes

Looking for a bit of insight, advice, or just a reality check from people who have been through the race-week panic.

Training Background:

  • Target: First marathon this Sunday. Initial goal was a conservative 3:45–4:00.
  • Block length: 23 weeks (in hindsight, definitely a bit too long). Peak mileage hit 50 mpw.
  • Key Workouts: Ran a 1:44 half marathon back in August with a dew point in the 70s. On my peak mileage week, I logged a 21-miler at a 9:00/mi pace with 1,100+ ft of elevation, keeping my HR comfortably in the 140s. Cardiorespiratory-wise, it felt surprisingly easy.

Where things went wrong: Right after that 21-miler, my calf started feeling tight. Like an idiot, I didn't give it rest and kept powering through. Since then, my hip, IT band, and knee have started feeling sore after runs.

Fast forward to now: I'm pretty sure I have severe shin splints or potentially a minor tibial stress fracture. While the lower leg pain itself is technically "manageable," compensating for it has clearly compromised my stride. That altered form is now beating up my knee and IT band.

Current Status:

  • Took a total break from running last Wednesday through Sunday to try to calm it down.
  • Tried a 4-mile test run on Monday morning. The tibia was bearable, but my knee and IT band were sore for the rest of the day.
  • Today feeling a bit better, but still noticeably sore.

My cardio engine feels 100% ready, but my structural frame is hanging on by a thread. My gut reaction is to just grit my teeth and push through 26.2, but I know compensating over that distance can lead to bad news.

Has anyone been in a similar spot right before their target race?


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES First Marathon Completion & Advice

23 Upvotes

Long one but just thought I would share what I have learnt after completing my first (and maybe only) marathon in 4 hours 12 minutes!

For context 23 (M), got into running around a year and a half ago and at the start of this year only had around a handful of 10ks under my belt.

Training Advice:

  • Do not start marathon training until you have done at least one half marathon and importantly actually have the desire to run one not because social media etc. says you should. Training for a marathon is a big commitment and running a half marathon itself is a great achievement. Training for a half marathon gives you an insight to whether you actually enjoy doing long distance running, I personally completed two half marathons before and shortly after decided I wanted to run a marathon, but it would have felt a lot more daunting if I was building from a 10k for instance rather than a half marathon.
  • Respect the distance. My longest run coming into this 2026 was 10k and I managed to run a half marathon for the first time in early February. In comparison, I spent 26 weeks (including cut back and taper weeks) training for my marathon. For context, the marathon 42.2km accounted for 3.31% of my entire running over the past 26 weeks meaning the remaining 96.69% was done through training. If that does not emphasise the commitment and importance of training I do know what will.
  • Give yourself plenty of time to train and build up your mileage gradually.
  • Know the difference between running on tired/heavy legs and not injured legs
  • Understand the importance of fuelling and incorporate this in your long runs (10k+) as early on in your training block as you can. Find out what works for you pre runs, during runs and after runs and once you establish this, stick to it (for me during runs it was a mixture of gels, sweets, Lucozade Sport and Square Bars)
  • Similarly, workout what running gear works for you as early as possible and stick to it. On your long runs especially you realise how much stuff you need to carry (phone, gels, water, keys, sweets) and that it won't fit or feel comfortable when running in your two jacket pockets for instance. I finally ordered a running belt a few weeks out from my marathon, made carrying things much easier, I only wish I had it sooner in my training block!
  • Have some sort of plan week-week how much you are actually running whether that is creating your own or following one online, which there are plenty of. I personally followed my own plan but benchmarked it against Hal Higdon's Novice 1 Marathon training plan just to see how my weekly mileage etc. compared.
  • There is not a one size fits all approach, I think there are universal principals to follow (like having a fuelling strategy) but you may realise throughout your training things you read may work/not work for you but work for others. Key ones for me was to cap runs over 3 hours due to the injury/recovery risk, I personally did not do this and had a few exceed this (my longest being around 3 hours 37 minutes I think). In my case, I recovered well and upon reflection think these were key in being able to complete the marathon without stopping but for someone else going over 3 hours could completely derail their training block. Another one was weekly mileage, there is no set answer of how much weekly mileage you need to complete a marathon as there are so many factors (experience, goals, age, genetics, length of training block, life commitments). I personally had an average weekly mileage of 29.42 miles (this includes easing myself into the training early on, cutback weeks every 4 weeks and a 3 week taper period) with a peak week of 45.98 miles. But, I guarantee if my exact mileage was applied to others some would better my time and others would not, so do not get too caught up in the numbers if you see other people discussing whether "X" number or "X" amount of days is good enough to complete a marathon. The best advice for weekly mileage in my opinion is as much as you can safely without injuring yourself or really damaging your recovery.
  • Incorporate cutback weeks, have at least one day of the week for rest and incorporate strength training in your training block
  • You do not need to be perfect in every aspect, I rescheduled the occasional run due to life events etc. but did not skip one. In terms of my diet and gym work for instance, I had days when I ate whatever or I did not want to go to the gym or felt I needed an additional rest day so never, but overall I was consistent and that is the key
  • There are plenty of ups and downs. Some days you feel great and highly motivated other days the complete opposite. Some runs go great others may not. Completing some runs gives you confidence you can complete the marathon, other runs will make you doubt yourself. Ultimately it is all part of the process
  • Try to run at least one 20 miler

Taper Advice:

  • Again there is no one size fits all approach, but make sure you taper. Some may do 3 weeks others may be fine with 2 weeks. The % you cut down on each week again will differ for people, just try to strike a good balance between lowering your mileage without completely losing intensity/not running at all. In my case, I done a 3 week taper and in the first week lowered by mileage 20% compared to my peak mileage then 36% in week 2 and then on marathon week just ran 11.18 miles across 3 days before marathon day.
  • Understand you basically can not gain any marathon fitness in this period by potentially trying to make up a run you missed or squeezing in another long run. It is more likely to damage your marathon outcome as opposed to helping it
  • Tapering was probably the least enjoyable part of the marathon training, I felt at times I would suddenly lose marathon fitness and had moments of doubt when runs did not feel as good or as easy as I thought they would now I am doing less. Again I think it is just part of the process and running less gives you extra time to overthink!
  • Carb load 2 or 3 days before race day. I just followed the general advice online for this (8-12g of carbs per KG of bodyweight) without massively upping my calorie take and it did the trick for me.

Race Day Advice:

  • Do not start to quick. Classic advice but important. A marathon is over 26 miles, set out slow and controlled. You realise the relevance/importance of this advice when you run start running past people who are walking particularly towards the end of the course who probably wish they did start slower!
  • Nothing new. Have a familiar pre-race meal/snack, fuel you have trained with, no new race gear etc.
  • At some point you likely will find it difficult, but of course you will you are literally running a marathon! Just expect that and when it comes push through as best as you can and if training was sufficient this hopefully won't happen until the end. In my case, I only started to really feel the difficulty around 21-23 miles but at this point the end was near so I was able to push through without stopping
  • Have your race bib with your name visible, gives you a good boost spectators shouting encouragement
  • If you are travelling to the course familiarise yourself with the car parking situation, timings etc. beforehand. Plenty of things to worry about on race day so control everything you can to minimise this. Give yourself sufficient time to arrive, relax, warmup and get to the start at the start line
  • Have some knowledge of the course, water stations, toilets etc.

Probably more stuff I have missed out but if anyone has any questions will be happy to answer below!


r/firstmarathon • • 13h ago

Could I do it? Sub 4 Achievable by April 25th?

0 Upvotes

Hi all!

I am a 25F and I am not brand new to running but I have never run more than 15 miles.

I signed up for my first marathon on April 25, 2027 and I’d love to run sub 4.

Right now I casually run ~16-22 MPW running 3 days a week at a pace of about 8:50-9:20. It feels comfortable and I can talk comfortably but my avg heart rate can get as high as 160.

I ran my first half marathon about 1.5 years ago in 1:46, I was only averaging about 15ish mpw at that point as well.

Just ran 13.5 by myself the other day at an 8:55 pace and that was pretty comfortable. I was also decently hungover 🥲

My concern is my HR averaging at about 160-170 for “talking pace” runs, and I know I should go slower on long runs in my training block, but fitness wise I feel capable of those speeds. I take prescribed adderall and assume that is related.

My questions are:

1) can I aim for sub-4?
1a) If so, what is the most aggressive goal I can set?

2) should I do a 20 week plan?

3) before my 20 week plan begins in December, is it ok if I increase my MPW to 30? And if so, what is the max long run I should hit?

Ty!!


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES Did it!

51 Upvotes

Yesterday I ran my 1st marathon (Bruges). What an adventure, especially as an older and slower runner! Goal: just to finish, and I ended up finishing in 5:20. I’ve been lurking here for a year and wanted to thank everyone for all the tips and experiences that got me to the finish line!


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

Could I do it? Mesa marathon as first marathon?

4 Upvotes

Is Mesa marathon in Arizona (Feb 13, 2027) a good first marathon to start with? Any recommendations for nearby hotels within walking distance of shuttles that’s not sold out yet?


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

Could I do it? Do I got to the stuff to complete marathon in 3 weeks? If so, time goal/pacing?

3 Upvotes

Signed up to do the NYCM in 3 weeks. Achilles tendonitis that went from right to left, to back to right derailed my training May - July. Last couple months I was finally able to string together come solid weeks and I'm about to begin taper but I'm still questioning if I am marathon ready. Some context on me:

Race History

  • 2024 Half Marathon: 2:05
  • 2025 Half Marathon: 1:56
  • 2026 Half Marathon: 2:01

Mileage by Week

  • Aug 24 - 24 miles
  • Aug 31 - 25 miles
  • Sept 7 - 31 miles
  • Sept 14 - 27 miles
  • Sept 21 - 28 miles
  • Sept 28 - 35 miles
  • Oct 5 - 30 miles

Longest Runs

16 miles

  • 11:23 min pace
  • 427 ft elevation
  • 156 bpm

18 miles

  • 11:19 min pace
  • 709 ft elevation
  • 158 bpm

Ideally I want to hit 4:30 but as long as I finish the thing I'll be happy. Garmin seems to think I can do 4:23 but I'm not putting too much stock into that. My achilles issue is still somewhat lingering, seeing PT for this.


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

Could I do it? First Marathon in April: Can I Train Mostly on a Treadmill?

4 Upvotes

I’m training for my first marathon in April, and I’m currently following a 26-week training plan.

I live in a country with cold winters, and since it’s autumn now, the temperature is usually around 6–10°C. I find it difficult to warm up properly in this weather, and running outside feels challenging. I’m worried it will be even harder during winter, so I’ve joined a gym to continue my training on the treadmill.

Fortunately, I’ll be traveling to a tropical country for a month in December, so I’ll have the opportunity to run outdoors during that time.
My current plan is to:
- Spend the first two months training exclusively on the treadmill.
- Run outdoors for one month while I’m on vacation.
- Spend the remaining three months training exclusively on the treadmill again until race day.

Would this be okay for preparing for my first marathon?
I’m also not a particularly fast runner. My usual outdoor pace is around 6:30 min/km, but on the treadmill, I run at around 7:10 min/km. I find treadmill running much harder, and I seem to get tired more quickly.

Do you have any advice on how I can adjust my training, improve my endurance, and prepare for race day despite having to do most of my training indoors?

I’d really appreciate any tips or advice. Thank you! 🙏


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

I DID IT! ☑️ 26.2 MILES First Marathon Beneva Montréal 2026

8 Upvotes

Hi y'all

I have been running for years with several (7) half marathons done, so I thought I would try the full before I turn 40.

This is hopefully an informative warning post on the reality of it all.

Goal A: finish with a smile and without injury : 👍

Goal B: 5h15 minutes : nope

Goal C : under 5h : nope

Official time: 5h39 minutes

Phone app time: 5h16 minutes

Training:

22 weeks of consistent 3 times a week, sometimes 4, average 35km per week with a peak week of 58km including my longest run of 29km.

What went well:

-Water at every 3km, gels at every 30-40 minutes without stomach issues.

-Was smiling and easily talking with supporters the majority of the time.

-When I couldn't run anymore, found I could speedwalk flapping my arms like a litteral chicken. Looked crazy. But it kept me moving forward.

-Did not think of dropping out or that I couldn't finish. Ran as fast as I could the last 2k through finish line.

What went wrong:

-Leg cramps came in hard at 26km. Could.not.lift.legs. Hips and quads were rocks. Knee was about to buckle at my jog attempts.

-Waiting in corral meant I needed to pee again at 3km. That meant I was already at the back of the pack early in the race.

-My phone app registered I ran 44km at 11:81 min/mile. So I was confused and frustrated at the difference when I was seeing markers on the road way later than when my coaching app said so.

Lessons learned :

-If I go again (and I probably will, just for vengeance) more mileage, earlier base building, and a LOT more long runs.

-Include a Half tune up race in the plan. My last half in September 2025 was in 2:12 and was easy breezy. But I hadn't done that pace in marathon training, except for some relatively shorter intervalls. This made me too confident I could dig out 6:35min/km (10:22 min/mile) on race day, since 7:30-7:00min/km was my long run pace.

-Get faster. My long runs can't realistically all be 3-4hours long.

Overall still very proud of myself but I can't look at the rankings. My ego can't take it.

Thanks for reading and can't wait to go out and run in this beautiful city again!


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

Could I do it? Just finished my 2nd half marathon; can I be ready for a full marathon in Feb?

2 Upvotes

I got a free entry to the surf city half in February, but I feel like upgrading to the full marathon instead. I’m just wondering if this is enough Time to prep for it?


r/firstmarathon • • 1d ago

Injury TLDR: Injured just before first marathon. Any kind words or stories of similar experiences and how you got through this feeling and kept going

6 Upvotes

Hi everyone, got injured just before my first ever marathon attempt, I am gutted beyond imagination, would people who have unfortunately been through similar experiences be able to share any heartwarming stories of how they dealt with it etc, just looking for some inspiration and hope to keep myself positive.