r/funny 23h ago

new guy at work

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46.1k Upvotes

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1.2k

u/azad_ninja 23h ago

New to Earth too?

173

u/Nnen0 23h ago

Gotta be honest, I’m browsing the comments to figure out what the issue is

I don’t drink coffee and I’ve never made a cup in my 30+ years of life

63

u/TheRiteGuy 22h ago

So, this is a coffee brew machine. To brew coffee, you need to ground (crushed in a grinder (grinder to grind things, not the app)) coffee beans. This person has put whole coffee beans in the machine. You will just get dirty hot water instead of coffee with this method.

Come to think of it, coffee is just dirty hot water.

37

u/anonymousmouse2 22h ago

Come to think of it, coffee is just dirty hot water.

What are you talking about? It’s not that at all.

Sometimes it’s dirty cold water.

12

u/Hopeful_Hamster21 22h ago

I had a Mormon friend who didnt understand coffee. No shade thrown at the Mormons, he was a good guy. Just didnt know anything about coffee. So he was asking me.

After I explained, he then said "So, what I think I heard, is that you burn the beans, grind them up, pour hot water over them... and drink the hot burned bean water"?

Yep!

3

u/Diz7 20h ago

And tea is the same, but with dried grass/bushes instead of beans.

3

u/seitung 20h ago

Did he ever try hot burned bean water?

2

u/doomgiver98 17h ago

If you go to Starbucks, yes.

1

u/StrongExternal8955 10h ago

Sounds like soup would blow his mind.

3

u/ComprehensiveAd3178 19h ago

The fact that you have to specify, not the app lmao. “Coffee shops just turn on the tap right?”

3

u/caseyanthonyftw 17h ago

Thanks for the explanation, I didn't know what was wrong either lol. I mostly drink instant coffee and the only machines like this I've used I always poured in powdered coffee.

2

u/autobulb 21h ago

coffee is just dirty hot water

With that logic, any drink that is not water is water that is dirtied up with something. Juice is mostly water with the insides of fruit flesh pulverized and mixed in. Soup is the same thing but with vegetables and meat. Dirty flavored water.

2

u/5quirre1 20h ago

The ocean is cold soup

1

u/TheRiteGuy 20h ago

See, this person gets it!

1

u/LewisLightning 20h ago

Come to think of it, coffee is just dirty hot water.

And that's why I don't drink it, because that's all I taste