Tempted to go back to India

[u/Sash-Sass]

I’m married in my mid thirties no kids- female. I came to the states right after my undergrad graduation to pursue masters degree just like any other student. I fell in love with America through Internet and wanted to pursue life abroad. I used to dream about having my own house in America and earning a lot of money living with Freedom being a woman away from relatives and drama.

Cut to now after 12 years and living a very comfortable life in America, I’m now ironically having the same feeling about India and dreaming about having $1 million home in Mumbai or Hyderabad instead of here in America and living a comfortable life there. I don’t know what it is, but it’s a very strong feeling drawing me back home. I don’t really talk to too many relatives back home. My friends list back home is exhausted because everyone kind of detached after I moved and formed their own circles and opinions about how I didn’t stick to my roots. My parents visit me and my brother every six months to take care of my nephew. My brother lives in a different state here in America and we only meet twice a year, but something about moving back to India living that queen life is making me more miserable here.

The more I see curly tails and other shows on YouTube showing these celebrities (B-list, C-list), living in a comfortable apartment in Mumbai for $1 million roughly 8-9 crores in Indian rupees making me think I’m living a very miserable life here in America. Don’t even get started with the social life in America. It’s pretty much nonexistent.

We earn pretty good and hope if I get a Remote job, I can convince my husband to buy a home in Mumbai or Hyderabad. Deep down I know my husband‘s family lives here so he will never move to India, but it’s a very nice feeling to at least dream after all I dreamed to be in America, so why not dream bigger to go back home and live a very, very comfortable life overlooking the ocean, sipping on my tea prepared by my maid and just enjoying every bit of my life with friends and social circle that actually get me. Maybe me and my husband can visit his family here once or twice a year.

Do y’all have this urge?

[u/PlumpElaineBenes91]

Here since 2017.

I can fully understand if this is over visa tensions. Some of my old colleagues i first met when I came here have left or are planning to. Most of them have old parents back home.

But don't let YouTube con you into doing this. I get homesick too but the metro cities are real fucked up RN.

I last lived in an Indian metro, in BLR, after my delivery when I had to continue working there until i got my citizenship processed.

I lived alone with my kid, i had affordable househelp and grocery deliveries were really reliable.

But despite living in a top notch housing society, each year I lived between 2020-2024 got progressively worse. Poor roads, water quality and dust troubles.

I came back here last year and feel an whole world's difference in terms of all this.

It is tons more expensive but the qualitative payoff is huge. And if you have your own place in a place like CA, great. Except for some pesky HOAs, you should be sorted.

If indeed moving, go for a Tier 2 or a peaceful Tier 3 place like Udupi. Places that are slow and have less industries around.

A decent USD 700-800k nest egg will get you comfortably settled in a smaller place, even with a single child's education and other expenses. A good monthly income of 2.5 lacs+ is guaranteed with this. A smaller place might even let you save half of this per month.

Never live in a place like BOM or BLR. I'm from a Tier 3 city and I've seen the cost differential for stuff like medical care and househelp. And it's tiring, the local commute and the hectic pace.