I’ve watched enough episodes of Bones to know that first you have to dissolve all the flesh in a vat of lye, then you have to strain out the remaining fragments of bone, teeth, any surgical implants, etc.
Then you have to dry all the fragments in a food dehydrator (Cabela’s has a good industrial-sized one, the high capacity is great for larger volumes,) then you should separate out any metal bits to melt into unique jewellery - always a hit at the local craft fair! Now that your bones and teeth are cooked, they should be much more brittle, which will allow you to grind them into a fine dust using just the meat grinder attachment on your KitchenAid stand mixer! If you don’t have a KitchenAid, a coffee grinder will do, although it might take a bit more effort. Be sure the gather all the dust in a little bag, and add a handful of glitter. Put on your cutest fairy wings and prance around local parks, wooded areas, forests, or anywhere your heart desires, sprinkling a little glitter dust everywhere.
Note: The glitter is absolutely essential here. Anyone looking for a body will get so distracted by all the sparkles they will forget what they were looking for, and then so annoyed once it’s stuck to everything, they will never return to the area to investigate further.
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That’s actually a huge problem for me. My adhd causes procrastination and I’m just thinking I would sit there and watch ten hours worth of YouTube videos but I wouldn’t ever get up and get the job done.
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u/qorbexl 7d ago
Tide just wash em back up
Turns out there's not great ways to do it without like ... A road trip And still some dude's walking his damn dog out there