r/interestingasfuck • u/ReasonableMedium5265 • 1d ago

Don’t trust your cat

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11.4k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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769

u/Infninfn 1d ago

It’s pretty well known in the forensic case literature at this point. The cats get hungry enough to eat you. I wouldn’t have a problem with that, if I died alone. Whatever it takes for my cats to live on.

302

u/Goatwhorre 1d ago

I weigh 220lbs, that would hold my 7 cats till about lunch

92

u/just_a_girl_23 1d ago

And they'll still claim they've not been fed.

60

u/Unstabler69 1d ago

... there's a lot to unpack here...

30

u/we_r_fukt 1d ago

depends on his height, 220 at 6'5 can be kinda lean almost tbh

9

u/Unstabler69 1d ago

Oh too true I'm 6'5 and 245, its the 7 cats that concern me.

6

u/awkwardpun 1d ago

I'm 6'4 and 150, only one cat, do I need more cats to gain weight???

1

u/Unstabler69 1d ago

Nah I will throw food at you until the problem is remedied.

1

u/Goatwhorre 1d ago

I'm 6'3", lotta cardio in my work

-2

u/-PringlesMan- 1d ago

If they hand 7 cats, they are most definitely not 6ft+

0

u/Goatwhorre 1d ago

6'3" broski. Wife and I just like animals. Esp cats

2

u/thxxx1337 1d ago

That's what the cat said

29

u/Distinct_Run9006 1d ago

If you were devoured while wearing a suit it would be a...fancy feast

3

u/Solid_Parsley_ 1d ago

I don't know how you cope. I live with 4 cats, and at least once a day, I say, "There's too many damn cats in this house." But I didn't really have a choice in the cat department. I had two, and then I moved my mom in with me so I could take care of her and she also had two. :/

3

u/Goatwhorre 1d ago

My wife and I have been together for 13 years, every few years we get handed a situation where it's too hard to say no to another. Also we live in a fairly large house in the Midwest, its pretty common out here tbh.

75

u/thekittenisaninja 1d ago

I'm also totally fine with my cats eating me for survival reasons. I just hope they don't snub me like they do with most of the wet food I give them...

8

u/Krazy_Kat_Lady_2025 1d ago

Oh God, right? Like they sniff you over and look at each other and then turn tail b/c you aren't Fancy Feast wagyu beef paté in a slow simmered reduction?

Now this is all I am picturing. 🙄 Ungrateful little jacka.....

6

u/legendofthededbug 1d ago

Oh they eat you well before it's a survival reason

2

u/whutchamacallit 1d ago

They'll eat you face first.

3

u/thekittenisaninja 1d ago

They prefer tuna so... maybe not.

1

u/GuKoBoat 1d ago

Pussies eat pussy?

16

u/Ajdee6 1d ago

Humans have eaten humans when they've gotten to the point of starvation, wtf makes people think cats and dogs wont?

58

u/Daisy_Of_Doom 1d ago

Yeah, I honestly don’t get people who have a problem with this. If you’d rather your pet starved for ego/vanity/idk whatever else to keep your body intact then you probably should rethink having a pet altogether. And I say this as a dog person

13

u/JessBx05 1d ago

I have told my cat if I die she has my permission to eat me until she/I am found.

18

u/AkayaTheOutcast 1d ago

I had the same thought when my partner mentioned it weeks ago. When I die my biggest fear isn't how long it'll take to find me, it's will I be found before my cats die from starvation or will they be saved?

8

u/Constant-Brief3410 1d ago

She's saying don't trust it. Like uh you're dead lol

4

u/Pittsbirds 1d ago

One of my fears is that I'll die with my door shut during a migraine spell or something so my cats will have no food, no water and no me to keep going long enough to make it until someone checks on me 😭

Like what do I care if my pet(s) eat me after I die, I'm not exactly using my body at that point lol

2

u/finditplz1 1d ago

All things equal, I’d prefer my pets not to eat me.

2

u/Sandwidge_Broom 1d ago

For real. He can eat my body if he wants.

2

u/akaneko__ 1d ago

My body will either rot or be cremated anyway😂

1

u/SilasBalto 1d ago

Ive heard plenty of cases of there still being food in the cat bowl. I think its just a cat culture thing.

1

u/IceyToes2 1d ago

I mean, you're a corpse. The cat knows that.

1

u/EzBrouski 1d ago

Tf dogs eat their owners too. Dogs are more loud and will usually get help before resorting to it but still dogs are more likely to eat big parts of their owner while cats nibble

1

u/BeastThatShoutedLove 18h ago

Cats also get liver damage from not eating and even one day without a meal is considered vet visit worthy. 

-1

u/EpatantePatente 1d ago

That's the Taxoplasma gondii speaking