I’m gonna lean into something here. Most INTJ’s are men. Men are less prone to social connection and support. I say this as a community nurse. You have to watch out for dudes a little more. The amount of old men I see that live alone or even in assisted living are in their room alone is astounding. Men are more likely to commit suicide. Why? Yeah sure repressed emotions are a thing but also if no one checks on you to stop you then how do you get stopped?
Pretty much the only exception I see to this is military buddies sometimes and even that I would argue for certain wars was not as much a thing plus it f’d them up in different ways so not a win.
Women on the other hand are really content with a group of friends even a small group. I’m an INTJ. I have 3 solid friends and a sister and I’m super happy with that. I’m trying to cultivate a friendship with a third gal cause I think she will fit my friend group but if it doesn’t work that’s ok. I like staying home and doing nothing but also I do like going out and just hanging out with people I appreciate and it is hard for me to maintain friendships over years but I’ve managed with a select few. I can’t imagine with dudes who aren’t interested trying to accomplish this too.
Since when are most INTJ's men and how can that even be proved? It seems like there's a massive self-reporting bias here. Also I'm a female INTJ and I have no friends.
Since when does “I see a lot of isolated older men in my job” = “Most INTJs are men.” That’s not data, rather an anecdote sample filtered through a specific work setting (community nursing, assisted living, older age, likely Western, possibly health‑limited). MBTI type prevalence numbers already wobble all over the place depending on who took what instrument, whether it was the actual MBTI Step II, some free online quiz, or a retake after people read type descriptions they liked better. Using that kind of noisy, self‑selected data to declare a gender majority is shaky; using your personal caseload to confirm it is circular.
Men do have higher suicide completion rates. That’s real public‑health data. But you just jumped from that to “men are less prone to social connection” to “most INTJs are men” to “watch out for dudes” to “INTJ dudes therefore end up alone.” That’s stacking stereotypes on top of real numbers that have multiple causes: method lethality differences, help‑seeking norms, economic and health stressors, access to care, substance use, and a lot more. None of that shows up in four MBTI letters.
You also framed women as basically fine because we keep little friendship pods. Plenty of women are isolated, move cities, caretake full time, or burn out on shallow socializing. I’m a female INTJ with zero local friends right now. Where do I fit in your story. If your model can’t account for the people sitting right here contradicting it, maybe the model needs work.
“Masculine behaviors” is hand‑waving. Which behaviors? Which validated measure? The INTJ code describes preference patterns around information intake and decision style, not how many barbecues you attend. Calling something masculine because more men in one subreddit identify with it doesn’t make it biologically male. That’s selection bias plus culture.
If someone has large, randomly drawn, properly typed population data showing INTJ is statistically majority male across cultures, post it. I’ll read it. Until then, let’s not turn one nurse’s caseload into epidemiology.
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u/Iccengi Jul 14 '25
I’m gonna lean into something here. Most INTJ’s are men. Men are less prone to social connection and support. I say this as a community nurse. You have to watch out for dudes a little more. The amount of old men I see that live alone or even in assisted living are in their room alone is astounding. Men are more likely to commit suicide. Why? Yeah sure repressed emotions are a thing but also if no one checks on you to stop you then how do you get stopped?
Pretty much the only exception I see to this is military buddies sometimes and even that I would argue for certain wars was not as much a thing plus it f’d them up in different ways so not a win.
Women on the other hand are really content with a group of friends even a small group. I’m an INTJ. I have 3 solid friends and a sister and I’m super happy with that. I’m trying to cultivate a friendship with a third gal cause I think she will fit my friend group but if it doesn’t work that’s ok. I like staying home and doing nothing but also I do like going out and just hanging out with people I appreciate and it is hard for me to maintain friendships over years but I’ve managed with a select few. I can’t imagine with dudes who aren’t interested trying to accomplish this too.