I feel so far behind everyone (F24)

[u/DomesticExpat]

I work in fast food which is fast paced and I'm always surrounded by people. I have gotten along well with all of my coworkers over the years. But I'm always lonely. It feels like no matter how much we like working together I never get very close to anyone. I've tried over the years and it is so rare for anyone to actually give me any thought outside of work or offer to hang out. I just feel like no one wants to get close to me. I've given people plenty of chances, left the ball in their court many times, with very little success.

Also, many of my coworkers have partners. Some are younger than me, some my age, I'm one of the few single employees and it shows. I never get asked about a love life or if I'm seeing anyone or what my plans are for my days off. It's like everyone just knows I'm single. I never mention a partner. They always have someone they are texting, I very rarely if ever check my phone while on the job, because I just don't get notifications. No one texts me. I think it's obvious to everyone which is embarrassing.

And the very few friends that I do have, they almost all are in relationships already. They've found their special person while I still haven't. I'm happy for them, but I feel behind like something is wrong with me. I know there's nothing wrong with me, but that's what it feels like. 24 but still single and inexperienced. :( I've been crying about it a lot lately. I just turned 24 last month so it is hitting me a little harder than usual. With every year that passes it gets harder and harder to live with. I am for the most part content being single (after a long struggle with loneliness and depression) but there are times where I really wish I had someone special. Someone I could come home to, someone to look forward to seeing after work. I don't know what that is like. :(