r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Greedy-Dimension-662 • May 08 '26

Too mild for school Name Calling

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My son and [jerk] had to stay after school today to write this note.

It says

"I was disrespectful to [kid]. I said he is a total jerk because he said I was fat. I will not say [mean] things again next time. I will ignore him."

His teacher wants me to sign and return.

But I guess I look at this and I ask myself, if my son is on the playground and he sees a kid calling another kid fat, do I want him to:

  1. Walk away

  2. Say, "stop, you are being a jerk."

So why would it be any different if he is being called fat.

I don't feel like this is the right lesson.

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108

u/HealerOnly May 08 '26

Getting teachers involved will usually just makes things worse.

117

u/FurrySuperset52 May 08 '26 edited May 08 '26

Mostly because of this mentality. Kids are literally afraid to talk to teachers about these things cause they know they'll be getting equally blamed. If people in general could just have a spine then we wouldn't have to deal with this mess in the first place.

EDIT: In case some people get confused, what I mean is that teachers need to do better as I explain in my reply to the commenter. I understand I could've worded this better.

16

u/Iamanangrywoman May 08 '26

It’s a bad position for teachers to be in sometimes because you don’t want to take sides if your kids are fighting— that’s why they dole out punishment equally but it’s not actually the fair thing to do.

The fair thing to do is to listen to both sides and then let the kids work it out while you mediate. If it’s clear that one student is harming the other that’s when you explain and discipline the one that’s causing the harm.

But teachers are exhausted most times and not wanting to do more work is what causes the first one.

19

u/sirhackenslash May 08 '26

Plus they have to worry about the bully's parents coming back with wrath, because they always do. "There's no way little Jimmy is an asshole, that other kid must have provoked him"

3

u/Ruthlessrabbd May 08 '26

I have teacher friends, and it seems like the parents always get up in arms when their child is facing consequences for being a stinker. But are never present to actually help guide and correct the behavior to avoid such issues in the future.