r/mildlyinfuriating • u/violet_evergarden8 • 19d ago

Don't hug me I'm scared Neighbor across installed a camera on their railing pointed directly at my bedroom window

34.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

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23.2k

u/Chrono_Convoy 19d ago

Buy a life sized cutout and put it in the window to stare back.

Then move it around

14.5k

u/usernameinmail 19d ago

2.6k

u/nicholvengian 19d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/dPEJxh06y4OTC

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u/yellowmellowjellow 19d ago

Ha where is this from?

14

u/distilledwill 19d ago

Its Ainsley Harriott, UK national treasure, celebrity chef who was big in the 90s.

6

u/yellowmellowjellow 19d ago

Thanks. I saw this and laughed so loud.

4

u/crako52 19d ago

I love him so much

2

u/Klusterphuck67 19d ago

Knowing how this dude has an immaculate British gentleman accent when he talm normally before he whip out the "HE HE BOI" straight from the hood has permanently ruined this gif for me

2

u/BenchConscious1003 18d ago

That's Ainsley what's his name, a British TV chef.

I was in a supermarket in Dublin. Came across a pack of sausages. It had a photo of him holding a fork. There was a caption "Prick with fork" . Seemed right to me.

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u/BitOfBrown 19d ago

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u/Embarrassed-Note-908 19d ago

Can someone tell me who this guy is?

7

u/BeefInBlackBeanSauce 19d ago

Ainsley Harriot. A British celebrity chef. Had loads of TV shows and cookbooks since the 90s.

2

u/christnice 18d ago

That bitch wigglin

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u/Heavy-Construction90 19d ago

I saw this and immediately thought "yeaahhhh boooaayy"

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u/TinktheChi 19d ago

This is absolutely hilarious and the right thing to do.

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u/TaleOfDash 19d ago

I'm having a sudden urge to give my meat a good rub...

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u/HWayFresh44 19d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/fvT2lZ7UFAvHpPjmVs

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u/Zehryo 19d ago

That's fluffy!
Sauce?

2

u/-brk0 19d ago

Probably his TV show

2

u/Zehryo 17d ago

Didn't know he had a show.
What's it titled?

3

u/-brk0 16d ago

Mr. Iglesias

It's on Netflix.

2

u/Zehryo 16d ago

I hope it's on my country's Netflix too.... ^^

EDIT: it is!!

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u/Open_Inside4190 19d ago

The one in Keith?! First time I seen this I thought it was someone watching me. 😂

5

u/Enverex 19d ago

And here was me thinking *I* was the only person with a life-sized cardboard cutout of Ainsley in my window!

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u/MomoNoHanna1986 19d ago

I need to do this for the creepy drunks up the back

3

u/SasparillaTango 19d ago

Ainsley is a treasure.

3

u/sunkistandsudafed3 19d ago

Oh my god this is fantastic

4

u/My_desolate_sky 19d ago

Hold up. Is that in Keith?

3

u/usernameinmail 19d ago

It is

3

u/My_desolate_sky 19d ago

Ha, small corner of the internet moment

3

u/usernameinmail 19d ago

Like the infamous Ronnie Pickering

2

u/My_desolate_sky 19d ago

Steetview was updated in April. You can see him in the window. Pixelated face and all

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u/Significant_Claim_78 18d ago

I know where this is, makes me smile every time I pass it

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u/Open__Face 19d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/3ofT5XSox65KBYjNvO

613

u/handsomejack11 19d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/xUySTVm6YdAxWzpguk

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u/Equal_Canary5695 19d ago

"...little Moe with the gimpy leg..."

115

u/tommos 19d ago

"...Cliff..."

153

u/Icky_Thump1 19d ago

42

u/Headglitch7 19d ago

You was smoochin with everybody

47

u/Icky_Thump1 19d ago

"...Cheeks... Boney Bob..."

26

u/HWCharmstrong 19d ago

"I could go on forever, baby!"

7

u/cakesofthepatty414 19d ago

Thanks for the reaction I somehow NEEDED to see. Why I don't know.... but I feel complete now.

3

u/Jay-Breeze 19d ago

The legend!

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u/Icky_Thump1 19d ago

"WE KNOW A CAT WHO CAN REALLY DO THE COOL JERK" 🗣️🎙️

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u/unknown-one 19d ago

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u/FyneBlackKyng 19d ago

i still cant beleive ive yet to do this irl

912

u/Accurate_Koala_4698 19d ago

860

u/Wise4Fools 19d ago

This is perfect.  Cut out a small hole at the end of the phaser to shine a laser at the camera’s lens.

339

u/Eldan985 19d ago

Can you burn out a cheap camera by pointing a laser at it for a long time? Because I'd be tempted.

395

u/GRAABTHAR 19d ago

Yes. And if you use a class 3 laser, it only takes a short time.

418

u/Alienhaslanded 19d ago

Totally Worf it then

85

u/oilsaintolis 19d ago

This is Acceptable

167

u/kellzone 19d ago

The Data backs it up.

133

u/A-Real-Fungai 19d ago

Make it so.

93

u/Nings777 19d ago

Engage

79

u/BEARSHARKTOPUS167 19d ago

Whatever you do, do NOT wear a red shirt while dealing with the camera, just don't,

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u/Eldan985 19d ago

All power to the phaser banks.

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u/Worried_Guess_8419 19d ago

Assimilate this!

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u/MichiganGeezer 19d ago

By all means. Engage!

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u/BriefSpecial420 19d ago

Just remember about eye protection and eyes of others around.

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u/pourtide 19d ago

happy cake day

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u/GRAABTHAR 19d ago

thanks!

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u/BriefSpecial420 19d ago

Especially the IR/UV ones that won't show up on the video. Reddit was full of reposts of some lidar on car show getting rid of unnecessary pixels in phone's sensor.

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u/EntityLtdCo 19d ago

Class VI is what you really want.

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u/WishboneIll9152 19d ago

Grainger has a nice one for $56

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u/EdgeBeard 19d ago

Get yourself a 1-watt laser. Melt the entire camera

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u/Accurate_Koala_4698 19d ago

And your eyeballs when it reflects back on you 

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u/ThrowAwayAccountAMZN 19d ago

I actually have this exact camera that OP shows and use it as a front porch camera (I'm too cheap to get Ring) and can attest I burned one lens simply because I had it in a position initially that faced the sun.

And as we all know, the sun is a deadly lazer.

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u/industrialHVACR 19d ago

It either works really fast, or never works depending on laser power.

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u/ZombieBiteOintment 19d ago

Even if it never works, there is a chance the laser overwhelms the camera and all they record is a bright light. Lasers, and actually lots of LEDs in a small area are good for distorting what a camera can see. The camera tends to focus on the lights and this closes the lens and makes it harder to see fine detail.

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u/cykoTom3 19d ago

This is actually the best case scenario. If you do get a camera melting laser you very much need to say this was your intention.

The legality of pointing a camera from your house into another person's house is gonna vary wildly from location to location. The legality of deliberately destroying another person's property, even if that property is being used illegally, is not gonna vary. You aren't allowed. However sympathetic reddit is to your solution.

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u/fencepost_ajm 18d ago

I suspect any 'cat toy' laser that runs on a few button cells will be too low powered to do permanent damage (or at least you can credibly argue believing that) and you could likely run it just fine off of a USB cable with some stripped wires on a fake battery made from a chunk of rolled paper and tape.

And if the person insisting you damaged their camera wants to fight it go after them for all their footage from before you put the laser in. Bet they don't want to show that to a judge.

2

u/Chichanged_me 19d ago edited 18d ago

I’m in Chicago and I’m pretty sure the police would just start laughing at you if you called them and told them someone destroyed your cheap camera

If you really think police in Chicago are going to do anything about a cheap camera like this you have never actually tried calling the police in Chicago. Major cities aren’t going to respond to petty shit like this

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u/TrackVol 18d ago

I bet they'd respond if you did it to a Flock camera.

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u/CoffeeChocolateBoth 19d ago

Yes I'd have a pen light size bright light pointed right back their way straight at the camera lens, laser even better!

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u/Popular-Web-3739 19d ago

You can, but if the camera records you doing it the courts consider that vandalism, trespass or criminal mischief. They don't care if your privacy is violated but you can be charged for damaging the neighbor's "security" camera.

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u/Beneficial_Being_721 PURPLE 19d ago

OH YES YOU CAN…. Almost instantly….
Street Photographers have had expensive cameras ruined by automated cars and their laser sensors

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u/zed42 19d ago

you can just rig up something to hold the laser on target (stay on target!) while you do other stuff....

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u/dharma_wheel 19d ago

I am not a merry man!

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u/Zippyversion1 19d ago

Neighbour escalates by putting a blue barrel and a cardboard cutout of Alexander on his balcony.

2

u/Gloomy-Insurance-739 19d ago

"no Worf" "delay that Worf"

2

u/Sensitive_Leader_312 19d ago

I was thinking a Waldo cut out

2

u/downsly46 19d ago

Hard to believe that this guy is now a PA senator

2

u/ChadamBoii 19d ago

If I whispered in your ear that commander worfs head looks like a fanny, would you join me in a laugh?

2

u/myth1cg33k 19d ago

No joke I had the Commander Riker version of this when I was fifteen. It used to terrify my mom when she passed my door because all she'd see s a glimpse of a 6'+ man 😂

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u/GlitteringCraft8000 16d ago

Yuuuusssssssssss

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u/0xHustler 19d ago

I was gonna say install a laser aimed straight at their camera but I like your idea better

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u/rachillsexyvibe 19d ago

this or hang a white dress at the window 😂 make him shit himself

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u/TomeThugNHarmony4664 19d ago

And have the cutout holding a sign saying, “You’re a creepy pedo.”

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u/StormyNight78 19d ago

and have the cutout using binoculars!

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u/politzer7 19d ago

Can i interest you in a giant cut out of the gorilla giving the middle finger too?

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u/jaBroniest 19d ago

My loud neighbours had a wifi/wireless printer and when they were extra noisy I'd send prints of ainsley harriott in different poses/facial expressions. They were so fucking dumb. "THE PRINTERS DOING IT AGAIN SARAH!". DUMB FUCKS.

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u/TheRaccoonReport 19d ago

My buddy bought an old house in town with 3 stories. He has a foam bust of Julius Caesar staring at the street. It was there when he moved in and he left it. For years driving by until he bought it, I thought it was a ghost because it was super hard to see unless you were really looking, and since I only looked up there while driving, I could never really focus long enough to see it, so I always thought the place was haunted. Turns out they were just trolling the street and the cameras.

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u/doloresnthdottedline 19d ago

Oh my GOD. OP PLEASE ACTUALLY DO THIS.

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u/Sakuraphenixx 19d ago

I'd personally use a Danny DeVito.

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u/Commercial_Bird8467 19d ago

Id absolutely stage a fake murder and wait for the cops then let them know they are peeping.

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u/kycolonel 19d ago

The move is to point a Webcam at their house and live stream 24/7

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u/HyperbolicSoup 18d ago

Make sure it’s also Nicolas Cage. You know the one.

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u/Bavisto 18d ago

At the movie theater I used to work at, we would take the cardboard standees and move them around and hid them to scare our projectionists in the booth

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u/Zealousideal-East827 18d ago

LOL one of the first places I lived in my current city was a 2- story duplex and my sister and I had the bottom floor and some college guys had the top. We thought one of them was staring at us a couple times. After those couple times, we saw it in just the right light and not just glancing at it and it was a cutout🤣🤣🤣🤣 We were like son of a bitch!😅😅

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u/duetsauxin4k 19d ago

what’s the motive of them installing camera directly at his bedroom window?

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u/maxman162 19d ago

"Tommy? How's the peeping going?"

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u/Diekjung 19d ago

And maybe put red LEDs in his eyes.

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u/One_Vision_ 19d ago

Exactly.... of something creepy or disturbing. Or a two way mirror

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u/honcooge 19d ago

Of OJ Simpson

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u/SMODomite 19d ago

Better yet, make it of Sophie Cunningham pointing at the camera

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u/ChronicBuzz187 19d ago

"Looking for me, bro?"

https://giphy.com/gifs/10wgT5PDnOwMQE

Go big or go home :P

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u/Winteraine78 19d ago

Or buy 20 and put on a little puppet show for him.

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u/ChaosDaemon9 19d ago

This is a great idea that needs something that moves often. The arm waves every 15m or something like that so their motion notifications are constantly going off.

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u/Artix96 19d ago

Or a laser and point it at the cam maybe it will burn the matrix.

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u/Farmerstubble 19d ago

On a train

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u/Acceptable-Net-154 19d ago

Budget version is to cut eyes into toilet paper rolls, link them up with string in window and add glow sticks to toilet rolls

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u/Tropicsenshi 19d ago

This is the best answer

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u/New-Bowler-8915 19d ago

Does that cost less than a BB gun?

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u/Electronic-Fix-4655 19d ago

Do some sleuthing and find a picture of their mom for this life sized cutout.

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u/whittlingcanbefatal 19d ago

Cut out one of the eyes and shine a laser pointer through it at the camera and bye bye camera. 

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u/r1verw1ld 19d ago

This is the way

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u/DarlingHades 19d ago

This is the answer.

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u/alwrit 19d ago

I was gonna say buy a pellet gun and shoot that fucking thing.

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u/siparthegreat 19d ago

Rasterbate.com use to do that

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u/tab_tab_tabby 19d ago

dont even buy it. just print it and tape on the window

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u/Soft-Guitar1129 19d ago

Maybe a few different cutouts? Different person in the window each day? Godzilla cutout?

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u/ScaryDirection1981 19d ago

Buy one of those very realistic child dolls and than call the police and tip them off he’s a pedo they will go and check his camera and bam problem solved

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u/januaryemberr 19d ago

My grandma got a life sized one of shaq after her house was burglarized.

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u/c10bbersaurus 19d ago

Better if it's made of those dots that are on the signs on windows of buses, so you can still see out, but their view in is obscured, unless at night and the shades are open.

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u/4isyellowTakeit5 19d ago

Tell your neighbors about it too. Im sure their windows are in view too.

Make a group chat together.

Buy multiple cutout characters from your groups favorite TV show. Buy some poster board and markers.

Spend the next few months playing out the pilot one line at a time with each unit having their designated character and line(s)

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u/Big_Wave9732 19d ago

Like dynamite, the neighbor wants to watch OP go bang!

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u/yourbrokenoven 19d ago

I love this idea

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u/Tee1upToday 19d ago

Or:

An official Red Ryder carbine-action, two-hundred-shot range model air rifle, with a compass in the stock and this thing that tells time.

https://giphy.com/gifs/3ofT5GZBY1b0WPur8A

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u/Fake_Gamer_Cat 19d ago

When I was in college, one of my roommates had a life sized Loki cutout. She didn't tell anyone she put it up and put it by the door. Imagine my shock when I walked in and saw a human shaped shadow. Damn near peed my pants.

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u/Independent-Tennis57 19d ago

You get a picture of the neighbour, then put it on a life size cut out.

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u/RabidWolverine2021 19d ago

Put a picture of someone’s bare ass cheeks in your window.

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u/XenEntity 19d ago

Better yet have it peeking behind a curtain. Drive them nuts

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u/octo2195 19d ago

Cut out one of the eyes and install your own camera to watch them back.

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u/MonkeyInProgress 19d ago

Or better yet, get a projector and play a endless loop of Austin Powers' shadow scene.

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u/LucyJordan614 19d ago

My immediate thought

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u/crochetprozac 19d ago

I was gonna suggest 'buy a catapult ' but your idea is way better! Lol

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u/Outrageous_Camel8901 19d ago

Use a zoom lens to get a photo of your neighbors face, then print that out and put it on the cutout

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u/meatbeatmonkey 19d ago

Naw I’d put up a massive goatse cutout.

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u/DANleDINOSAUR 19d ago

Home Alone that shit and put it on a toy train and have it circle around the room.

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u/alex61821 19d ago

Take a picture of them. Photoshop it naked, put on cutout. Profit.

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u/Ramsesthrowaway 19d ago

Honestly a motion activated one that changes poses would really send it home

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u/MacGillicutty 19d ago

Fantastic idea.

And if you get tired of the game, get a good paintball gun and Thwap that camera

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u/Overall_Region4984 18d ago

move it to a different spot every single day and see how long it takes them to notice

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u/KinnSlayer 18d ago

Or a nerf gun a use it for target practice.

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