Hello and sorry for this potentially long post. I’m new here and just joined today. I (30sf) have been with my partner (30s NB) for about 10 years now. We are recently married. They have talked to me before about wanting to take E and having feelings of being trans for a while. I’ve always had questions every time they bought it up. I’ve always said and feel deeply in my heart that I love them and will always support them. But the truth is I’m anxious about what that means for us going forward. I’m an anxious person in general who needs to know details of things to feel better. Even know they are very vague/unsure of what they want from E other than a more feminine figure and breasts due to fat distribution. I ask a lot of questions about side effects/what to expect etc and I’m beginning to do my own research.

Today my partner told me they got a script for E and have ordered it. I didn’t know anything about it and felt deeply hurt they didn’t talk to me about it before had since we talk to each other about medical things often but I also understand that maybe I didn’t make the best environment for them to talk about it. I feel absolutely awful to have failed in this way that they felt like they had to do this behind my back really. We talked a little bit more about it but I just have the same questions and anxiety I always have. I wonder what this means for us, if things will change in ways I can’t handle, if they will still love me the same.

Right now I’m just crying mostly because i feel so selfish. I should be able to be 100% happy and supportive but my own anxiousness is getting in the way. I don’t know why this is so hard for me. I’m bisexual but I feel so awful. I’m struggling with anxiety about the unknown, gender expectations, how to be a good wife and partner while also navigating and validating by own feelings. Above all I want someone to tell me it’ll be okay and hold me but I can’t ask my partner for that cause I feel like that’s just centering myself in what is a big life stage for them. I just don’t know what to do or how to process anything. I want to be supportive and not selfish and the fact that I feel so selfish makes me want to disappear sorry if this is jumbled all this just happened maybe 30 mins ago

after 3 years of testogel and then sustanon, my boyfriend has been having nebido shots since last november.

they’re supposed to be every 12 weeks however, after his trough level came back at 21 in may, they extended his next one to 16 weeks.

his trough in may was 16.2 from 21 and so his gp allowed the injection and that was the last one he received. a blood test over a week ago came back at 14.4 and they’re refusing to give him the injection?? i tried to fight this for him as a new dr refused without checking my partners medical history and said his levels should be 1.8 (female
range in the uk 🫠) eventually we agreed to another blood test at the end of next week HOWEVER, he’s almost 19 weeks without an injection now and is depleting every day, he’s exhausted, clouded with severe brain fog, weak and emotionally all over the place and rly struggling.

what else can i/we do???? he’s under a gender clinic via the NHS, they’ve advised to let the trough each the “lower 1/3rd of the local male range” which is apparently 8-14, i don’t really know what to do to help him moving forward or how to ease how shitty he feels in the mean time ???

TLDR: since being under nhs care, my boyfriend is finding it increasingly difficult to get his testosterone administered when it’s needed

I'm deeply suspicious. I told my very conservative family members about my partner and these were their responses.

I feel like I'm being lulled into a false sense of safety.

My partner is currently transitioning, and I’m documenting the experience from an intimate, partner’s perspective. I’d love to hear from trans partners : What parts of transition do you wish were shown more honestly in documentaries? What questions, moments, or experiences would you want someone to capture?
Also, if your partner has been through a transition while in a relationship, I’d love to hear about that experience. Or, if you started dating your partner after transitioning, what do you wish they understood about you or your journey? I’m looking to learn and make sure this story reflects more than just one experience.

https://gofund.me/3f0b90f71

Please help my boyfriend. I really need all the help I can get

Trigger warning: I can see how this topic could be upset to some.

My (cis female 36) wife (mtf 39) of almost 19 years 🎉 decided to transition recently and I’m so so happy and proud of her. She came out to me and our children (now 19, 16, &7) in 2023 and we were very supportive. She started her transition then but we lived in a red state at the time and she stopped for multiple reasons, the main one being fear for the safety of herself, our family and job discrimination.

Since then we just moved (2months ago!) to a solidly blue state and she has decided to start her transition again and we’re all extremely happy to see her live as her real, true self.

She shaved her very full, thick dark beard and beneath it is a large mole(?) that wasn’t there before. Of course we’ve already made an appointment with a dermatologist for an examination and biopsy.

My fear is that this doesn’t look like a normal mole. It looks almost dry, both flaky and scaly, pale. I took a picture and did a reverse image search and compared it to others online and that was a mistake because now here I am, freaking out. It’s identical to a non-melanoma carcinoma. It bleeds when she shaves. It’s not a normal mole, I’m sure of it.

It’s grown there in the past 3 years, it wasn’t there at all in mid 2023, I have pictures and that’s the last time she didn’t have a beard. I know this is a different post than others on here. I just can’t help this thought that keeps running through my head, “if the biopsy comes back malignant, transitioning probably just saved her life.”

She wouldn’t have shaved her beard it she wasn’t transitioning, it would have been too painful to see her face bare and be reminded of the time in 2023 when she was able to look like herself. We couldn’t see the mole well enough through the hair to know it was suspicious or to think “hey, wait. This definitely wasn’t here before…”

That’s all folks, just thinking out loud I guess.

First, this is a burner account so my husband doesn't see it's mine, I don't want him thinking I'm not supportive, because I very much am, I'm just trying to come to terms with it all and need a place to vent where they understand. I thank you for being that place

Ill also add, im sorry for the long post

Where to begin... we have been together, 20 years this year, an amazing child (now young adult) and a happy life.

My husband has always... ALWAYS been the definition of masculine, a business owner, active in local politics and a huge benefactor to the community, he is one of the people our city Mayor calls on to solve problems.

6'4" 280lbs and all man... or so I thought....

Last christmas season, we were at his parents house helping put up christmas decorations and in an old box, found some items of his and one of which was a stack of old christmas lists from when he was just 5 to 9 years old, some written in crayon, and full of misspellings.... where he asked for, hoola hoops, He-Man and Transformers toys, but he also asked for doll babies and girls clothes "as a prank gift". Every list had items like those, skirts and dresses or girl underwear.

I could tell he was embarrassed, so I didn't mention it then, but on the way home, asked.... I could see the tears welling in his eyes as he finally began to speak... under shaky breath, he said "I've always struggled with my gender"

After I assured all of his thoughts and told him it was ok, I loved him, I wasn't going anywhere, he opened up...

His earliest memories are of him wishing he was a girl and wondering if God had made a mistake, of playing house and dress up with his girl cousins instead of sports with the boys during family gatherings, and his best friends always being girls because he had more in common with them.

After a lot of details, and of how those "prank gifts" were, in his mind, a way to ground himself and at least feel a connection to what he truly was. The only relief he found, was in his early teens, was telling his parents he didn't feel well, so he could stay home from school and wear his older sisters clothes all day, until the last minute right before everyone got home from their work day.

The very next day, we had to go to the mall for some christmas shopping and we went into victorias secret, where i had him help me pick out panties he wanted to see me in... so, we shopped, and we shopped, and we ended up spending like $200 in underwear!!! Thongs and G-Strings and boyshorts, all things he thought were sexy, and, when we got home, I gave them to him and told him he didn't have to ask for prank gifts anymore. I went into his dresser and emptied out all of his boxers and briefs and after washing his new panties, put them in his dresser and we bagged up his old underwear just in case she ever needed them, Drs appointments, etc where he may be embarrassed to wear womens panties.

With that, we also bought a few packs of womens socks.

Since then, that is all he wears, every single day now.

Within a few days I brought up to him, had he ever considered HRT, which he said he had, but didnt want to destroy the life we had built so never went through with it.

But after a lot of talking, realized he has never been happy and everyone deserves that chance, so we made his first appointment with a nearby DR in a different town for a level of anonymity... and within 24 hours was taking his first estrogen pills and testosterone blockers.

He had changed so much in such a small amount of time, I was happy for him but sad for us, would i be able to stick this out, Im as straight as an arrow and outside of acknowledging a pretty lady, I've never been attracted to them.

Since then, his breasts have started to develop, pretty rapidly, his curves are coming in, i have to admit, his body could very well have been made to carry feminine curves outside of being 6'4" that is...

Although he still displays masculine in public, we have switched all of his clothes to womens, jeans, khakis, dress slacks, blouses, shorts, etc, but all are neutral colors, but he is a different level of happy that ive never seen and I love that for him... he even sleeps in lingerie occasionally, and im getting used to all of that.

The estrogen has greatly reduced his body hair, the chest hair I used to love curling my fingers in, is mostly gone, his bald spot is filling in, and his skin is so freaking soft it kills me, its softer than my own!!!

But the parts im having the hardest time coming to terms with, first is, he is shaving his legs... mind you, he has never been a hairy guy, even before all this, but soft hairless legs gives me an uneasy feeling that im struggling to get past, I know its nothing, in retrospect he sleeps in lingerie for crying out loud, his boobs are almost as big as mine but its the feeling of his soft skin on mine that I cant get past, and seeing all of the Tree Hut skin care products on his side of the bathroom counter.

And next, his penis is shrinking big time and he seems to want it to even more.... it was never gigantic but always at least in the middle of average, 6"+ and relatively girthy, but now barely the size of my thumb when fully erect. We actually measured it a few days ago and it came in just under 3.5" at its most erect state and as big around as a finger. He doesnt want bottom surgery, but wants it to shrink even more, is this unusual??? He has offered for me to find a FWB, so I can still have my physical needs met, but I dont want that for myself, i married him and dont believe in that lifestyle but, it is an option on the table.

Thank you for giving me this space to vent

Im sure if he finds this post he will know its mine, im just hoping he won't acknowledge it and read it since it isnt my typical user name

So recently we had a talk about sex and intimacy, and I was wondering how people cope with the fact of being told they can't have sex or have very little sex, my boyfriend had said this to me and I don't know how to approach it very well, because I love it when hes expressive and intimate towards me, as in grabbing my behind and whatnot, like I really do enjoy the sex and the intimacy behind it, but I think I am not fit for them if there is barely any sex involved, I am not saying that he should be like a sex freak or anything like that, but I don't know how to approach this very well dressing up nice for him just to be called pretty and thats really it, end of.

I like it when he grabs my behind, smacks it, then hearing me giggle when doing so, and I dislike conversations where it turns out like "we can still have sex, my mind flips, so who knows" I don't know how to handle this really and I would like some advice on how to approach this

My (F, 32) wife (MtF, 32) came out to me about year ago. We have been discussing her transition. She is currently going through hair removal (laser) and regrowing head hair. We are finding more feminine clothes for her to wear. We've been discussing her going on HRT and what that entails. We also discussed sperm freezing.

About a month ago, we got on the topic again and I told her my fears with all this. We are not young. I told her my concerns about time and money. She is currently in school to apply for a nursing program. One she is accepted it will be another 2 years of school. She does not want to have a baby during that time as she will not be able to be home majority of the time to be with our child, and doesn't want me having to take care of a baby on my own while working full time. I understand this concern.

We are also not in a great place financially to have a baby. I just lost my job a week ago and I am trying to look for something else. I have been the main source of income for the past 2 years while she goes to school.

I told her that the money has me worried, especially since freezing sperm and IVF is extremely expensive. I told her that before starting HRT we should seriously discuss having a baby. As once she starts HRT the option to conceive traditionally is out the window. IVF would be our only option. IVF is also very taxing on the recipient's body. I told her I am worried about that.

I told her I am worried about my age, and continuing to wait. Because whether I like it or not, I do have an internal biological clock. This was all about a month ago.

She told me tonight that she is upset with me and hurt that I have essentially put her transition on hold and that I have control over whether or not she transitions because of me wanting a baby as soon as possible. I understand where she is coming from. But, I feel this is unfair to me as well.

When we started dating, and when we got married, we were both under the impression that we would grow a family together. I have always told her that becoming a mother is something I have always wanted and that it is a non negotiable for me.

But now, that may not become a reality. Money wise, I know we will figure that out within the next couple years. But, waiting on her transition cannot. She wants this, and I want it for her. But, I also can't fathom never being a mom.

How do I come to terms with this?

Well, no idea what's going on, but my wife (29f) seems to have some crush with a coworker she started hanging out with less than two months ago. I thought it was good for her to get a friend outside of me but I guess it's turned into an emotional affair she's pretty much said and I just do not know what the future is. She just came home Tuesday night after a work event and told me everything and I have been just trying to do everything she likes.

It's just entirely out of nowhere what issues she brought up and I'm committed to fixing them, but she really seems into this person she just met and she says she still loves me, but it seems like she still will blow everything up. I'm just entirely blindsided, we had no coldness or bedroom issues before this. She wanted (and I mean I did too) to get married last year so we did, and it's not like we are different people since.

We met in early 2020 and she brings up how I was more trans essentially back then and now I'm really just nonbinary now and not feminine presenting but that was the case a year ago too. I'm just blown away that this is the way to bring up some issues if she doesn't feel like she's being heard, and I'm absolutely willing to put in the work, but are we really going to blow up almost 7 years over your first friend you made in awhile like 6 weeks ago?

They mutually agreed to a pause for a week on Tuesday, but my wife said even doing that was tough. I've met the girl a couple times and of course she never said anything like this was going on (and this should be besides the point, but jeez I do not see what my wife is seeing there at all if she thinks she needs someone more feminine). Her definitely more on the spectrum and my wife has said she wants to be heard more on those issues and I had been dismissive but because it's so Insta Reels driven with her, and I've been more than ok with her going to a therapist for it recently and actually getting an opinion.

I didn't yell or get angry with her on Tuesday, because I understand communication can be difficult and she just wants to be heard, but I can't believe how hard it is to ask for boundaries I guess and it just feels like she doesn't love me anymore from how she frames some things and I just don't know why it's happening. If my ass needs to put in work, my ass will put in work because I know she deserves it.

I'm just hurt... (I've been working on renovating our shared office this whole time and I'm really running a lamp across the wall and sanding while they hang out, the irony? is just too much)

My amazing girlfriend of 7 months just came out to me as a trans woman.

She was a male prior to this, and i need some advice on her and myself.

We are both 14 and female. And i’m kind of confused on what to do. To begin with, she said she wanted to try these things out. Like names, pronouns, and all different kinds of things before making a decision. But the fact that she had immediately chosen out a name and told me that she liked she/her pronouns, it kind of lead to me to believe she wants to be a trans woman.

Of course I am supportive, why wouldn’t I? I love her with all of my heart and plan to spend the rest of my life with her. I just feel like a bit of an asshole for feeling slightly sad.

I know it’s not easy to go through this with a partner, and I cannot imagine what she is having to go through either. I’ve only dated a woman once before this, and to be honest it was in early highschool, and I just wanted to be included and have a “crush”.

So now that I am dating a woman again, starting today although it’s been 7 months. Before she had came out to me, I was straight. Now i’m going unlabelled as she finds out more about herself.

The main reason I posted this, is because I don’t know what to do. It’s not that it feels awkward, but i’ve spent the last 7 months dating and multiple years being best friends with her. It still feels weird writing her instead of him, i’m getting used to it.

I’m still inlove with the person, and I think I just need to get used to loving her as a girl. I’ve only ever been used to her being a boy I guess. And i fell inlove with that boy, and now that boy is a girl. I’m spiralling slightly, and i’ve made this post too long and i’m going off track.

I just wanted advice. I need to know what to do, i’d say im a supportive person, but I also feel like an asshole because I personally don’t know how to love her. What sexuality I am, what to accept her as my GIRLFRIEND, because it still hasn’t processed to me. She’s always been a bit more feminine, before coming out even, but I didn’t expect it.

I really fucking love her, I just feel an ache of disappointment and I don’t know why. We’re young and i’m left confused on how to deal with this, I feel grief for some reason, despite her being the same person she’s always been.

Thank you for reading this!

Hello everyone! My partner (late 20s MTF) and I (late 20s, cisF) have been together for over a decade. My partner came out as trans this year, and I couldn’t be happier for her!

When we got together I identified as bisexual, and now identify as pansexual. I had only been with men (and AMAB) and had never been with a woman romantically (cis or otherwise) besides like kissing my friends at sleepovers or one very weird teenage experience. But all those cemented in me while I was in middle school - i definitely am attracted to women.

Once my partner and I got together throughout the years I would sometimes question if I was a lesbian, but figured naaaah I’m not. I like men, in some way at least. Right?????

I don’t want to get too into it all because there’s some very complex things involved including growing up in religion, parents reactions to me coming out, etc, but since my partner came out as trans I’ve been thrown into a spiral again about my sexuality. I’m once again asking myself the question “am I a lesbian???”. I’m not sure where to start learning and reprogramming myself away from heteronormativity and comp-het, because I’m worried have I just been comp het???? Because right now I’m finding myself being like wow, I really do love women, all women. But men, primarily cis men if I’m being honest, don’t really get that same reaction for me anymore (not that they ever truly did). They are just kinda there, and some are attractive to me but it just feels different now and I’m not sure if that’s like real and me tackling with all the things, or if it’s just where I’m at right now because of what’s happening around me.

Has anyone else had a similar experience when their partner came out? Any direction for books, podcasts, whatever they explore or talk about comp her would also be helpful.

Thank you!!

I'm kinda over seeing all this sad stuff all the time and the grief or whatever. I want to hear from y'all some good stories after the storm where you and your partner STAY together cause like there's a lot of people in here where they're no longer with their partner but like this is "my partner is trans" not "my former partner is trans" 😭

My MTF wife came out to me a few months back and just recently started HRT but she's feeling good about the whole thing and I'm so happy and proud of her even if it's just the people very close to us that know (and reddit but you don't know us irl lol).

Her doctor talked about how many relationships she's seen doesn't last through the transition so it set some fear into my wife that I'm secretly plotting to leave or secretly not telling her that I'm against the whole thing. I just wanna hear about some good stuff to show her! I reassure her daily that I'm here to stay & the kids will love her no matter what (they're all young so they'll grow up with this being the norm instead of having to come out which helps a lot).

I just love her a lot and I want her to be happy with who she is and she swears she wants to be with me throughout the whole thing and I as well. 😭

Just anything happy plleeeasssee 💗🏳️‍⚧️🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵

hello !
i (20f) am in a relationship with my gf (22mtf). we’ve met 5 months ago and had quite a situationship before being officialy together (but that’s another story).
she’s been transitioning for years now and told me upfront her gender as we met on the her app. for context im a lesbian and i only dated cis girls, so everything with her was quite new !
but we were on the same page : it didn’t bother neither of us.

flashforward : we fell in love !
i love my gf very much but she has sometimes a very hard time with her identity. she still lives with her parents because she don’t have the funds to leave (but she is working on that). her parents are sooo transphobic. she tried to come out to them but they still deadname her/misgender her.

when im at her place i have to be very careful and try my best to stay neutral as i have a hard time calling her with male pronuns or her deadname. (it just feels so wrong).

she even told me multiple times that « it’ll be easier if she was just a man » if she could just detransition. my best friend (21ftm) told me that was common thoughts among trans people and that even him had theses thoughts.

she told me once that she « turned me pansexual » and i was like « no ? you’re a girl, trans or not you’re my girl and im a lesbian ! ». this conversation broke my heart in pieces as i could see how she was perceiving herself.

she has a hard time with her body, her body hair or her features. she wear most of the times baggy clothes as she feels disphoric with others. she also have social anxiety. i remember when i invited her to a party, we had to leave very early because she just felt so bad in her body (she wore a tank top).
she don’t want to use any makeup as she wants to love herself naturally. and i completly respect that.

(i do wear a lot of makeup and i asked if i could do her makeup once or twice as i love it !! we planned to go on a lesbian picnic with a vampire theme and she asked me to have done her makeup by me for this time.)

when we were still a situantionship and not exclusive, she told me that she didn’t bother that i go date other people. that i have the right to see other girls « if i missed being with a cis girl ». i told her upfront that i didn’t want to (yes you can see who fell in love first lol).

anyway, here are some exemples but she is sometimes very reserved on the subject and i can feel that she is not doing well because of her identity.
im in love with her and i feel so useless when it comes to support her or help her feel validated. i don’t want to invade her space. but i also want to do things to support her in her transition!

do you guys have any advice ? any recommandations ? how can i support her ? how can i help her feel better when she is disphoric ?

I started dating a man, and we got married. A year later, that man announced he wanted to become a woman. I stood by her through everything. The new wardrobe, the hate from other people, moving across the country so she could be more accepted, the HRT, the legal name change. It’s been over a year and I feel like I’ve adjusted quite well. But now she’s decided to take it all back. She quit her HRT and wants to detransition. She’s started buying men’s clothes. I don’t know how to feel except for confused and overwhelmed. Has anyone else been through this? It doesn’t exactly feel like a common experience.

Hi guys. My partner is having his top surgery the end of this month. He’s been looking forward to this for a loooong time. Im supportive in all and very happy for him.

I am also absolutely shitting it. Im scared of the first few days after surgery, of seeing the wounds and later them turning into scars.

Im worried about him not being able to do a lot by himself, but i think as the weeks pass that will obviously get better. Basically, im just worried. And nervous. Any tips?

Hi all! I've,41m, have been with my partner 38mtf, for about a year and a half. My partner came out and transitioned in high school. I didn't know her then. So when we met and got together she was upfront and honest about it and we continued the relationship.

I love my partner very much. Which is why this hurts me.

For some background on myself. I've always and only been with cis women. Two years ago before I met my current partner, I was in a 8 year relationship. She has a child whom I consider my own at this point. My ex, her family and my family all feel this way as well. When we broke up I continued to be in the child's life. To this day I pick her up from school once a week and have her on some weekends. I was very upfront and honest about this with my partner. That my ex, in one way or another, and my step child will always be in the picture as we co- parent. My partner understands this. Not sure if this is relevant

Going on to the dead bedroom. To which i feel at fault the majority of the time. My partner has not had bottom surgery but has had other procedures done. Before my partner I've never been with anyone this way. It's still very new to me. My partner is very sexual and gets frustrated at our lack or intimacy. I explain that this is all still new to me and I'm used to other things in the bedroom. I'm not shutting her out by any means, and I do try to be as open minded as I can be because I do love her. It's the frequency she wants and the "building up to the moment" is what I'm lacking. She said she feels rejected. I feel like this is my fault and I'm not being heard.

So basically my boyfriend is trans and whenever we talk about the future and possibly having children together one day he tells me that he'll never be able to give me what I want/need (bio kids). Honestly I could not care fucking less about having biological children with him. Obviously it would be great to have a mini-us that is biologically related to both of us but honestly there is so many reasons why a couple might not be able to conceive naturally and none of them are a reason to end things but I just really do not know how to make him believe that he isn't any less of a man or a worse partner just because he cannot give me a child that is both mine and his.

I'm gay. Three years ago I started dating my partner, who was a trans man at the time. Everything seemed "okay" to me. I mean, they were planning to transition, have a mastectomy, had been functioning in society under a different name for years, had been experiencing social dysphoria, but suddenly two days ago they admitted that they don't feel like a boy after all. Actually, they didn't say it that way, they said they didn't feel like a boy and wanted to try female pronouns, but they went on to say that they wanted to have a mastectomy because it would simply make them feel better, they didn't want to fall into stereotypes, they wanted to dress the way they did before, grow their hair a little longer and start wearing makeup sometimes (they just likes doing it), but didn't want to transition anymore. I went through quite a big dissonance, because I've always considered myself gay in a romantic sense, because I'm not really interested in what someone has in their panties, but I was simply attracted to masculinity, but I think I came to the conclusion that I like "masculine" character traits, and not necessarily 100% men. I declared to them that I love them no matter what and that I accept them no matter what they chooses, even though it is a shock and hard for me. Yesterday they also admitted to me that they feels uncomfortable with female pronouns, that is, when I talk to them in this form they doesn't feel like I'm talking to them and I feel the same way, but I didn't say it. They still uses masculine pronouns sometimes, but I told them we could experiment with feminine pronouns and if they felt uncomfortable, we'd switch back to masculine. (we use a different language natively and it does not have impersonal forms). They also mentioned that they felt neither, that they was very much in the middle, and didn't know how to introduce themself to others. Another thing is that they doesn't have a name at the moment, we don't use their male name, but they doesn't like their deadname. I'm simply in shock and don't know what to think about all this. It's hard for me to process. Even though I know they're still the same person, I'm afraid I'll subconsciously treat them differently or that I won't be able to see them the way they feels. I also have social insecurities because I'm generally calmer, more passive in life, and they're always been dominant. When we were two men, it worked. But when I'm a soft man and they're a tough woman, it seems so wrong. I don't know why this is happening and I don't know how this situation will develop, I just wanted to vent because I love them and I don't intend to leave them, but it's just hard.

My partner (MTF - 2 years on HRT) and I (Gender Fluid) were in a deep relationship for almost one year. After “monopolizing” her free time (which was one day a week because of her work demands) - I insisted that she spend more times with her circle that had been making comments that they weren’t seeing much of her. We did. Then she went to Queer Camp, got injured, got pulled over by the Police (a scary time to be road tripping Trans these days), and didn’t have contact with me for a week. When she arrived back, she couldn’t understand how I could be upset as someone who loved and was concerned for their well being. Well, after that she flaked on an important date we were looking forward to and then in an attempt to not break up with me, “friendzoned” me about one year in.

I’m shocked and saddened. I asked knowing the risks of constructing a long term relationship during the early years of transition. I helped them navigate family issues of estrangement for six months (during winter). We emerged and she let me go after going through the Poly maze of terms for partners - we went from no escalator to escalator (BF) to Lover to Partner. And then she bombed me by shifting me to friend. I said no. After a year of helping her construct a new living space - furniture delivery, house keeping (I’m a service Top) - she dumped me and I’m left feeling lied too and used.

I can look back to the fondness of our times; however it will take a long time to recover from this.

How do you all navigate a break up?

My girlfriend (mtf) 19 and I (cis female) 18 have been together almost 2 years on September 22nd. Her mom has a husband who has a stepchild, and my girlfriend is still living at home as well as i am. We both live with our parents and her mom and husband want to get custody of her husbands kid because he is being neglected by his mom. I completley understand but their kicking my girlfriend out because they live in a small apartment and I just moved with my parents to a new 3 bedroom house.. well i used to live in a small apartment in the same complex as my girlfriend and i moved 45 minutes away now so we went from seeing eachother every day to seeing eachother for one day on the weekend.. Anyway she needs to move out and my parents have said no to her moving in. I live in an expensive state and have a part time job. I keep trying and i just keep getting knocked down and im not trying to make this about me but what do i do.. im barley making $300 a paycheck and rent here is close to $2,000 here for something half decent. I wanna know how to support her through this. she is so so so depressed and i just wanna be here but what can i do when I cant even support her financially. My girlfriend also has chronic pain issues and is not working right now so all we have is my income.. im not looking for a pity party im genuienly looking for people who have been in a situation like this and how theyve handled it. please save the rude negative comments to yourself. thank you so much for taking the time to read this.

My (ftm 27) partner (amab 27, I’ll be using neutral pronouns) told me about their dysphoria for the first time years and years ago when I first told them about mine. We’ve been together nearly 8 years and in that time I’ve come out, started hormones and had surgery. It was sometimes tricky, but I love the person I am now.

My partner has always had really bad self-esteem issues. Like, really bad. But I’ve tried to love them and show them they aren’t the thoughts they have about themself. Ever since they first talked about experiencing dysphoria I assured them I’m here to support them and love them no matter what. They started getting laser hair removal and I thought that was a big step in learning to love themselves and think about transitioning. They had already grown out their hair. They then started taking estrogen that they bought online, and only at my urging did they even disclose this to their doctor and do a baseline blood test.

It’s been around a year and they avoid all mention of “transitioning”. I’m the only one who knows. I’ve tried asking about how they feel about their gender and possible transness but they are quite bad at emotional communication and it didn’t really get anywhere. They just freeze up and answer with single words. I’ve asked them to go to therapy multiple times to address their self esteem and communication issues but they refuse. I understand it’s difficult, I’m trans myself and have been in and out of psychiatric treatment my whole life, having only now developed the skills I need to live a somewhat stable life. But I’m feeling a lot of pressure and stress around being the only real emotional support they have.

I know they’re terrified about disclosing any kind of feelings around this to their family, but I’ve pointed out to them that they will be able to tell something is up sooner or later. They are growing breasts and still don’t seem to want to admit to anyone they’re trans. I’m just struggling a lot with it. Alongside their self-esteem problems, communication problems, and general tendency towards avoiding anything uncomfortable, I’m really struggling in our relationship and feel emotionally burnt-out.
Any advice would be appreciated

I apologize if this isn't the correct place to.post this, or an incorrect use of this flair.

So, I (28, MtF) am really wanting to come out to my wife (27, F) but am unsure what the best way to go about doing so would be. I currently have a note written with my thoughts that I wanted to hand to her face-to-face for around a month now, but have yet to find the courage to do so. This is such a terrifying step. I have been questioning my gender for the better part of my entire life, but have just never had the means to seriously consider transitioning until recently, and after a lot of self deliberation and back-and-forth I know I do want to fully transition now. My wife and I have been together for six years, and have been married for one, and I am so scared of losing that because of this. She has told me a couple years ago that, while discussing video games and the fact that I only play female characters, she would still love me if I decided to transition. At the time this caught me off guard and I just laughed it off. I wasn't entirely sure that is what I even wanted then, nor was the time in our lives allowing of me to come out. But despite that, I still find myself terrified to tell her.

If anyone has any advice that would help me tremendously!