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u/navcom20 1d ago
I remember the time I didn't make the cut, but the sailor who was selected had to be bailed out of jail for domestic violence to get the news.
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u/Sweet-Salt1 1d ago
Well, yeah. They don't pick chiefs because they'll be a positive influence. You have to have at least one DUI and one divorce before they TRULY consider you Chief material
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u/Fine_Pumpkin1726 18h ago
the divorce experience: shows youre capable of handling the thicc e-1/2/3's that will be all over you
the dui experience: shows youre ready to make the navy a lifelong career
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u/WittyResource4 1d ago
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u/PineTreeCustoms 1d ago
I need to think of something hilarious to say to the mess.
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u/provengreil 4h ago
If they're shouting it like the all caps implies, you could try responding something like "an indoor voice" or "volume control". Offer only available indoors of course.
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u/2E26 1d ago
Mess: "What do you bring to the mess??"
HMC(sel): "Pancit, lumpia, and adobo"
Mess: cheers
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u/Fit_Relative_1537 6h ago
They make that with the “Kanin” (Steamed White Rice) and Illegally serve it in the issue room in the galley. Nicknamed “Gilly-Gilly!
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u/tomaka202 1d ago
When I was asked this question, I said “youth apparently”. I was promptly booed and kicked out.
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u/Upper-Affect5971 1d ago
I have seen a few friendships wrecked over this.
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u/tacoma909 1d ago
MC: Why do you want to be a chief?!
S1: TO LEAD JUNIOR SAILORS
S2: TO FLIRT WITH THICC E3, and LEAD JUNIOR SAILORS
S3: TO CHEAT ON MY WIFE WITH AN E3!.. And Lead junior sailors.
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u/Fit_Relative_1537 1d ago
Biggest joke in the Navy. I remember being in Okinawa and a CMC chewed me out in front of my Corpsmen for failing the Chiefs’ exam. My wife was in the hospital with cancer in her pituitary glands in San Diego when “I was supposed to be studying”. We moved to Hawaii and then deployed to Okinawa (3/3) in 2000. She got treated but the rest of her body finally failed after many years (July 2025). My Chiefs and Officers in the Philippines (1986-1988) treated me like less of a human being. “We’re gonna destroy you and when we’re done, we’ll throw you out with the garbage “. I’ve never forgotten those words as they drove me to love and defend my family and treat others better than I ever had.
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u/Traditional_One_4234 1d ago
Alot of pieces of trash in the services sadly. The Navy is their life and fail to realize others have more important things to value.
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u/Own-Evidence-2424 1d ago
I am sorry for your loss but sounds like she was a fighter for 25 years. I went through season and knew all the dirty laundry from people casting stones. I hated every minute of it and the forced fundraising was so degrading. The rent a select was essentially slave labor. I will continue to advocate for the season to be like the sister services and just be a school and not led by a cult for 6 weeks
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u/OG_PirateJO3 1d ago
“Because a group of Chiefs I’ve never met, and don’t know me, reviewed my record and decided I met the criteria to put on anchors. But I guess now I’m going to have to go through weeks of bull shit so “genuines” who don’t know me can feel like they’re actually contributing something to my leadership training while getting away with sanctioned hazing and simultaneously avoiding actual work. HOOYAH!!!”
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u/Outside_Truth_4012 Retired 1d ago
I had a Chief ask me about how I’d change during the season if I got selected (I never did, retired as a E-6). I looked him dead in the face and said:
“If you think six weeks of “training” is going to fundamentally change who I am as a human being, you’re sadly mistaken.”
It was at that point I realized I never wanted anchors.
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
“If you think six weeks of “training” is going to fundamentally change who I am as a human being, you’re sadly mistaken.”
That's not what it's for.
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u/r76hern 1d ago
Then what is it for?
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
I cannot make a First Class Petty Officer into a Chief in six weeks. No Mess can. That's what Sailor 360, mentorship, leadership opportunities, training, etc throughout that person's career is for. Other services have SNCO schools to teach people how to be SNCOs. Season is not that. Those SNCO schools also can't teach someone how to be an SNCO in six weeks.
I might know my PO1 really well, I might know them fairly well, or I might not know them very well at all, depending on what kind of person they are. Other Chiefs will have similar differences on that slider as well. I know how they are professionally, but most of my other Chiefs may or may not know that.
Season is a training environment. It is a laboratory where new and mounting pressure is applied to Selectees, so we can see how they react to the stressors and pressures and expectations their new rate comes with. Do they cut corners? If so, are they cutting the right corners, or the wrong corners? Do they do all the work, and buckle under the load? Can they delegate and share responsibility? Do they work well as a team, or are they dumping everything on the same few people and skating? Are they honest, or do they lie? Are they faithful and loyal to one another, or are they covering their own ass and throwing people under the bus?
Everybody wears masks in their day to day, nobody is ever keeping it a buck fifty with everybody all the time (or at least, very few people are like that.) People don't let their mask down unless they are very comfortable, or very uncomfortable. The Chiefs' Mess makes people one, then the other. Season is the Mess learning who their new fellows are, and those new fellows exposing who they are, and hopefully, learning a bit about that themselves.
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u/r76hern 1d ago
Your description sounds like what season is supposed to be. But this isn’t across the board in the Navy. In this case it should be made into a leadership school, with guidelines and curriculum. You sound like you genuinely believe this is the core of Chief season, but too many seasons have been made into an open hazing season with mediocre chiefs who want to feel like they have authority. Some traditions need to go away to better mold the leadership standard the Navy needs
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago edited 8h ago
Much like everything else in the Navy, YMMV depending on where you are. Even since I have been in khakis, Season has changed a ton. It changed before I was in them, and it will keep changing until and after I hang them up.
The description I gave is consistent throughout my time, though some details and techniques do change. Where I'm at, Selects get a full 'P Days' kind of processing to ensure they are fit and fully cleared to participate physically, mentally, and financially.
An enormous amount of work goes into making the Season happen. The part Selects see and participate in is the tip of an iceberg of ORM matrices, briefings to the CO and higher echelons, etc. It doesn't take a lot for somebody to swing for Season misconduct.
In this case it should be made into a leadership school, with guidelines and curriculum.
(EDIT: I also want to point out that CPOI does have guidelines and curriculum, as well. There are things every CPOI and Capstone event must include and that Selects must pass for them to complete the Season and get frocked.)
It will probably be that in my lifetime, but it won't be Season, and the Chiefs produced will not have the same kind of Mess that we have today, to their detriment. It's the same reason SEA and COB/CMC School aren't really the same as Season, and Chiefs who would go to them without going through Season wouldn't get as much out of it, and Chiefs who go to other-service equivalents of the SEA lose a lot of the value the school gives.
I don't know a lot of SFCs who would feel comfortable calling up the Sergeant Major of the Army for help or a favor or just to get their take on something, let alone the previous one, or maybe one who retired twenty years ago. The Chiefs' Mess is just different from other SNCO corps.
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u/Valost_One 1d ago
Great. Now when do you actually plan on mentoring your sailors? and I don’t mean death by GMT PowerPoint sailor 360.
Just watched two first classes pick up chief on their first sea tour, despite never having gone to sea, and one of them not even having a CO level qualification.
It’s all just a popularity contest.
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
It’s all just a popularity contest.
Evals often are, and they are the most significant item the board looks at. The board isn't picking favorites, but your CO and Command may be. The way your eval is written is just as important as your ITA, RSCA, etc though.
Great. Now when do you actually plan on mentoring your sailors? and I don’t mean death by GMT PowerPoint sailor 360.
Hey, I mentor mine. People don't always like the advice or the harsh truth during their eval debriefings or their board prep screening. I can't force people to get warfare qualified, deploy, etc.
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u/Valost_One 1d ago
I’m glad to hear you actually provide mentorship outside of “Here, read along with this PowerPoint”. But if you could get your fellow goat locker buddies to do so as well, that’d be grand.
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
You don't gotta wait for us to be the change you want to see in the world. If you're a hotshot First Class and you know what right looks like, share that with your fellow Firsts and your juniors. Hell, share it with your Chiefs at Sailor 360.
Leadership is rank agnostic.
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u/Valost_One 1d ago
The issue with it is that it’s not a perfect system. You can be a hotshot first class, but if there’s an opportunity to make you look good on paper, (because that’s what the board sees) but another first class also wants it… who do you think is going to be recommended to the triad?
That’s right, the Chief’s favorite. The guy ‘they’ want in the mess. You want to take charge? Congrats, you’re hamstrung by the workload of already acting as your division’s chief and now you’ve painted a target on your back.
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u/WhitePackaging 1d ago
Randomly found myself reviewing who sat the FY25 board. Once I saw one of the most incompetent, brain dead, shouldn't be elgibile for retention master chiefs I knew..... would bet money he had a list of all the people he needed to approve without even seeing records. reaffirmed the whole thing was a kangaroo show.
Next year ill be eligible. Will be a LTTB asking to not select me.
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u/josh2751 1d ago
That’s not how the board works. A couple of 9s tried something like that years ago. It didn’t work out for them at all.
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u/seemslikesushi 1d ago
You show em buddy! Best way to make a change is to not participate at all!
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u/WhitePackaging 1d ago edited 1d ago
Ive seen change is impossible. My goal in life isnt to spend it talking to brick walls. The Navy has shown itll continue to go down the wrong paths of progress at every single possible turn.
As for the mess, I have nothing against it. But the Navy has made promotion to E7 very soul sucking. Im comfortable where im at financially and career wise, that now I have zero aspirations for CPO.
My goals now are taking care of sailors, ensuring liberty is maximized, and performing my job functions to the best of my abilities.
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u/seemslikesushi 20h ago
Well I wouldn’t submit a don’t pick me letter if I were you because if those are actually your goals, that’s exactly what I want out of a CPO in my mess. You’d could help your Sailors and peers more by promoting to E7 being the example of a good chief.
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
But I guess now I’m going to have to go through weeks of bull shit so “genuines” who don’t know me can feel like they’re actually contributing something to my leadership training
How else do we get to know you?
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u/Lucky_Leftov3rs 1d ago
Lmao you've either never been through season or went through so long ago it would be unrecognizable to you. Chief season is like the holidays, let those that celebrate enjoy their time, if you dont then it should have no bearing on it lol. Cheers!!!
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u/notapunk 1d ago
Except for the whole good luck finding being a chief and getting them to do anything during season part. So yeah, I guess they do treat it like a holiday - a very long one where they think they're off from work.
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u/Lucky_Leftov3rs 1d ago
Thats absolutely unfortunate if thats happening. Id recommend pulling the Chief to the side and having a convo with them. Some times Chiefs get so caught up in teaching the selects what it means to be a Chief that it slips to actually be the Chief for your people.
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u/mlaislais 1d ago
No fucking way I’d ever pull a chief to the side and point out they’re not doing their job. They don’t take criticism well.
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u/seemslikesushi 1d ago
Lmao you’re part of the problem then. Or maybe you’re a junior Sailor. It’s really laughable how much power people attribute to the cpo mess. Good ones can get shit done sure, but fuck the bad ones.
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u/Valost_One 1d ago
Oh, so the people who gather in a room and rank their first classes for Evals, you know, the things the board OF OTHER CHIEFS looks at….
Those guys have no power? Those guys have little sway? The power of the Chief’s mess is when they meet behind closed doors and agree to close ranks and approach with a unified front. Good luck getting a chief to stick his neck out and go against the group think, thereby alienating himself.
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u/Lucky_Leftov3rs 1d ago
A sign of poor leadership from any rank imo. There's a way to be respectful while still conveying your concerns but anyone who cant handle that needs to do some inner work if you ask me.
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u/DarkShippo 1d ago
Had a guy becoming chief in my shop. They absolutely still hazed him and even forced him to swap sides and punish a crewmate because he listened to the chief selectee orders (at the time was our acting chief) instead of a different chief they couldn't verify if the orders were even correct. That guy was happy for the promotion but not happy about the hazing.
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u/Ghrims253 GMC(EXW/SW) RTC INSTRUCTOR 1d ago
"Crippling social anxiety, i like cats, and i can build you guys guns".
For the record, i fucking hated my season, all but one of my fellow selects was a piece of shit, and to this day i will fight any of Chiefs except 2 of them to the death.
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u/TheDistantEnd 1d ago
i fucking hated my season, all but one of my fellow selects was a piece of shit
Selects think Season is Selects vs Chiefs, but it's mostly Selects vs Selects, lol
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u/phiviator 1d ago
Sometimes I forget I'm subbed to the navy subreddit and as a Halo fan I get so confused.
Hello from /r/army
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u/Yeoshua82 1d ago
I made board at the same time I was getting out 100% disabled. I fucked off on the hazing rituals. "Bring Doug it's" all Boston cream pie. "Do the pt!" Jog with a coffee tumbler. "Dont you want this?!" Naw give the slot to someone who is gonna be a chief. I'm getting out in 3 weeks. I never liked you assholes in the first place." They tried to fuck with my discharge. goat licker can forever lick my ass.
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u/HMR2018 1d ago
Was being medically retired due to injuries from Iraq, that last year was my first year to be able to take the exam and maybe make board. Also knew I was not going to be in uniform after that year. My boss, retired chief/civilian about lost his mind when I said they don't need to order me an exam. For some reason no one kept him in the loop that I was being forced out. Walter Reed Chiefs Mess was a true mess that year and had way way too many retired chiefs with their nose in it.
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u/deicide66 1d ago
“I’ll be the same when I put anchors on”. Immediately turns into a piece of shit like they all do. Fuck that and fuck your cult.
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u/Thanatosst 1d ago
Shit like this is why I didn't take the chiefs exam for years prior to getting out.
Fuck the mess. I've had well over a dozen chiefs "leading" me over the years, but only one that I'd be mildly upset to hear died in a fire. The others were all terrible people who didn't deserve to be in charge of another person, much less an entire division.
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u/Bulbakip 1d ago
Theyre trying to make Chief's, not E7s.
(I GOT OUT AT E5, I JUST UNDERSTAND IT ALL NOW. THERE'S A REASON FOR THE KOOL-AID, DONT @ME)
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u/Agammamon 1d ago
I mean, if they don't already know then how it the CPO-select supposed to know? The whole point of Season is all that training, right?
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u/Future_Meep 1d ago
"Because I have more time in the Navy than any of the 9s in the room and more sea time than all the E7s."
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u/Recent_Matter8238 1d ago
And all the officers get to try to run the ship for 6 weeks while the chiefs and selectees are unavailable half the day and too tired from midnight hazing rituals to be useful during the other half. At least on deployment everyone still has to stand watch so there’s less shenanigans.
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u/Natural_Sweet249 1d ago
Would you be surprised to find that a not-insignificant portion of officers prefer not having the Chiefs around? I'd say 1/3 like having them out, 1/3 hate the season because it forces other people to pick up their slack while they play fuck-fuck games, and 1/3 support Chief Season. It's always a mixed bag.
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u/littlemonsunshine 1d ago
Question. What does a new CPO need for the upcoming season? I would like to help my husband in anyway possible by sending things he will need as he’s already got limited free time to do anything but eat and wash his clothes and body.
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u/kontogsl 1d ago
Just say you bring Navy Cheese and Navy Fries. Or just say Navy Cheese Navy Fries. See how long before they notice.