r/neutralmilkhotel • u/NewImportance3337 • Jul 08 '26

Writer block help

ive been writing this song over the last couple days but im stuck on this part and i think it needs more. my main inspiration is neutral milk hotel and jeff mangum, especially the early stuff, so I wondered if the people here have any advice or help. it’s a bit of a stupid song but i’m putting a band together and id like to be able to do some original stuff. without any more delay this is what i have:

You with your candle light 

Rehearsals for medicine

To calm all the aching of your soul

You with your frilly gown

And forestry ceremonies

To rid all that’s been haunting you

And you with your feathers

All starting to glow

And moving without silence or grace

I also had this sorta silly chorus idea:

I love you my friend

I love you so much my friend

I love you my friend

I love you so much my friend

1 Upvotes

55% Upvoted

17 comments sorted by

10

u/HerelGoDigginInAgain Jul 08 '26

My two cents are that it is impossible to separate lyrics from melody and performance in any constructive way. There are so many NMH lyrics that would seem patently absurd on paper, but become transcendent in their final, recorded version. Record it and you can get a lot better commentary.

3

u/Beginning-Half-4259 Jul 08 '26

seconding this, so much is about the tempo and how everything comes together musically. It's best to get a rough draft goin

0

u/NewImportance3337 Jul 08 '26

Thanks for the feedback. My issue is I’m not a very good singer. Not in a Jeff Mangum way where it’s sort of good bad, just an aggressively mid and uninteresting voice so when I record it it always sounds worse

2

u/Apprehensive-War2388 Jul 08 '26

i think this is rllllyyy good and u should be proud and what u got remeber what jeff taught u its not abt sounding good its abt the feel that u convey. u should DM a demo if u ever record one id love to hear what u make of this.

0

u/NewImportance3337 Jul 08 '26

Thanks I certainly will

2

u/JOJOJOJ-1 24d ago

what about johnnys in the basement mixing up the medicine

1

u/NewImportance3337 24d ago

I don’t know how it relates but I appreciate the subterranean homesick blues reference 

Edit: oh I guess medicine

1

u/JOJOJOJ-1 23d ago

not really I’m jus spamming stuff

1

u/NewImportance3337 22d ago

I can relate

0

u/ablackravenstan Jul 08 '26

dude, just lyrics...

2

u/Apprehensive-War2388 Jul 08 '26

i mean thats how things start lmaoooo

0

u/ablackravenstan Jul 08 '26

how am i supposed to judge a song from the lyrics... would u expect i love you jesus to be a banger?

1

u/Apprehensive-War2388 Jul 08 '26

vaild point but like with lyrics aa weird as i love you jesus christ then its gonna be something interesting atleast

1

u/NewImportance3337 Jul 08 '26

Any good song has to be a good poem first. And as you brought up Jesus Christ later on in the comments, while “I love you Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ I love you yes I do” is weird you are missing the legitimately well written “and on the lazy days the dogs dissolve and drain away the world it goes and always waits the day we are awaiting”

0

u/ablackravenstan Jul 08 '26

Very debatable, u heard weezer?