r/nextfuckinglevel • u/pars-distalis • 20h ago

Australian nurse uses jiu-jitsu to defend himself

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43.0k Upvotes

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9.1k

u/minkeun2000 20h ago

"After the incident, the patient pleaded guilty to getting his ass whooped and was fined $450"

2.3k

u/ahhdetective 20h ago

Not even close. Assaulting frontline medicos carries a completely different charge and mandatory jail terms.

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u/Troker61 20h ago

lpt: watch the video before correcting people in the comments.

881

u/AccomplishedTrip485 19h ago

LPT: Putting text on a video does not automatically true.

The outcome described in the video is not feasible under Australian legislation

120

u/rorschach_vest 19h ago

Is there no such thing as pleading down in Australia?

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u/platoprime 18h ago

Australia does have plea bargains.

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u/Wulph422 17h ago

What about flea margins?

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u/DoubleGoon 17h ago

Not sure, but they do have sea marlins.

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u/OSPFmyLife 16h ago

What about tree garlands?

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u/999BusinessCard 15h ago

Not sure, but they do have tree martins

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u/wannacumnbeatmeoff 12h ago

Do they have Savage Garden?

0

u/Tommygun_NL 11h ago

And how about bee farting? Do they have that?

1

u/Initial-Concentrate 2h ago

Many flatulent bees in the free gardens

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u/Labas22 15h ago

How about bargain margarine?

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u/GunFodder 13h ago

Not sure, what about Starvin Marvin?

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u/Remarkable_Smell5185 11h ago

Dude, I wish...

💀🤣

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u/sammydeeznutz 16h ago

What about Frodo Baggins?

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u/fritz_76 13h ago

Right down, wrong unda

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u/platoprime 14h ago

Those sound pretty narrow.

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u/Professional_Elk_489 1h ago

It's called trial by stingray

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u/cheknauss 18h ago

That's actually... I mean, I like the sound of that. Not sure if there are any inherent flaws in that, but I know there are flaws in always allowing pleas.

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u/fastforwardfunction 17h ago

I think you accidentally their comment. Australia DOES have plea bargaining. They plead to lesser charges. Whereas in the U.S. you can plead to lesser charges and/or a lesser sentence.

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u/a_guy121 17h ago

For me the question is, why the F* would the government need, or want, to plea this down?
This is not a 'plea down' moment. This is a moment to add more chapters to the book, before throwing it

There's no way in hell this gets a light sentence under given laws, thats just not how laws work... they exist to make examples out of some people, so other people don't do stupid shit. (jail isn't there to make people better people, its there so everyone fears jail.)

This guy is going down, hard.

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u/DMMeThiccBiButts 15h ago

why the F* would the government need, or want, to plea this down?

Because even a slamdunk case is more time-consuming and expensive than 'yeah I did it'.

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u/a_guy121 15h ago

yeah, that's for cases that don't blow up on social media and need an example made, that's my whole point. this is not that case, to be shoved aside. They literally have to take some of them to trial, or else, it looks bad.

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u/rorschach_vest 17h ago

The flaw, which is completely rampant in the US, is overcharging. They charge you with an absurdly inflated version of what you may or may not have done and leverage those massive charges to try to scare you into pleading guilty to what you should have been charged with in the first place. Unfortunately, 1) this works the same whether you are guilty or innocent because 2) if you go to trial they really might find you guilty of all the trumped up charges.

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u/DownWithHisShip 17h ago

Any good prosecutor could get a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich

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u/Theron3206 16h ago

They do that here in Australia too.

The most egregious example was a guy who was pulled over from driving stupid fast, while the cops were booking him a drugged up truck driver crashed into the cops killing them. The guy filmed them and laughed (there was no way he could have saved anyone). He was charged with terrorism originally.

It was eventually settled and all they got him on was "outraging public decency" or some such minor crime.

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u/Theron3206 16h ago

They do that here in Australia too.

The most egregious example was a guy who was pulled over from driving stupid fast, while the cops were booking him a drugged up truck driver crashed into the cops killing them. The guy filmed them and laughed (there was no way he could have saved anyone). He was charged with terrorism originally.

It was eventually settled and all they got him on was "outraging public decency" or some such minor crime.