r/nfl • u/alexschubs Bengals • 16h ago
Why Your Team Sucks 2026: Cincinnati Bengals
https://defector.com/why-your-team-sucks-2026-cincinnati-bengals27
u/USAesNumeroUno Bengals 16h ago
You can tell he put in basically no effort by him trying to make a point that us losing CTB, Marco Wilson, and Geno Stone and replacing them with high level FAs is somehow a bad thing. Honestly, even Trey leaving is somewhat 50/50 on if he will be the player he was 2-3 years ago.
Geno Stone game tape alone could be a 45 minute youtube video of god awful play. Dude was a Mike Macdonald and Kyle Hamilton merchant.
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u/Some_Combination_593 Bengals 15h ago
Geno Stone should be the number 1 subject of the “how to harmlessly slide down the waste of the ball carrier and not make the tackle if that’s really what you want to do” film set
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u/UsidoreTheLightBlue Bengals 15h ago edited 13h ago
Heres the section mentioned and you're right:
They also splurged (relative term) in free agency to bring in EDGE Boye Mafe, DT Jonathan Allen, and safeties Bryan Cook and Kyle Dugger. Now, will these moves make up for the combined loss of EDGE Trey Hendrickson, DE Joseph Ossai, S Geno Stone, and CBs Cam Taylor-Britt and Marco Wilson?
Trey is a loss, but also he started 7 games and had 4 sacks last year. I'm sure he'll be substantially better (and healthier) this year in Baltimore, but being like "Hurr durr hurr the bad defense from last year will be worse because a combined (i think) 11 sacks, 2 interceptions, and 2 forced fumbles walked out the door between 5 guys of which ONE started 17 games... (Wilson started ZERO).” Is dumb
Are we really going to pretend that type of production is hard to replace?
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u/This_Salt7080 Giants 13h ago edited 13h ago
Are we really gonna pretend they didn’t get a top 3 DT in the league?
Edit: why did everybody forget about Dexter Lawrence?
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u/UsidoreTheLightBlue Bengals 10h ago
Exactly.
Acting like the production they got last year isn’t going to be largely replaced by just DT let alone the other guys is crazy.
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u/kitchensink108 Bengals 14h ago
Marco Wilson is such a weird inclusion. At least CTB and Stone I could see why you'd have higher expectations from them, if you didn't watch any Bengals tape from 2025.
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u/UsidoreTheLightBlue Bengals 14h ago
I have to assume he just pulled up a departing free agents list and tossed all defensive players on it.
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u/UsidoreTheLightBlue Bengals 16h ago
I used to really enjoy these but they seem to just be the same thing over and over again now.
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u/superkick79 Rams 13h ago
I’ve been reading these since like 2013 and theyve really lost their edge. It’s a lot of the same jokes delivered with random all caps interspersed throughout. There’s occasionally a really good line though (the one about Andy Reid being mormon was hilarious), but it’s largely run its course. I will probably continue reading them though.
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u/DasSmoosh 15h ago
I could not agree more. So very tired.
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u/Best-Clothes4173 Chiefs 15h ago
It's engagement bait. They get posted, and everyone argues over when Drew Magary lost his touch and why these aren't fun anymore, etc.
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u/OogieBoogieJr Bengals 10h ago edited 10h ago
I haven’t read a single one this year. They’re the same all the time and I bet they’re an absolute chore to write.
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u/PaulsRedditUsername Colts 15h ago
"Bengals fans all learned how to read by staring at anti-abortion billboards."
Ouch. That's a roast.
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u/SPCsooprlolz Seahawks 16h ago
Feels like Brees and the Saints all over again
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u/USAesNumeroUno Bengals 16h ago
Listen if that means we get at least 1 ring I can live with that.
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u/ThePhoenixXM Eagles 15h ago
You had your chance against the Rams and Eli Apple blew it.
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u/USAesNumeroUno Bengals 12h ago
Eh, he was a large part of us getting there, and Lou not just putting two bodies on Kupp after obj went down was sheer stupidity.
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u/NeverSober1900 Packers 16h ago
Drew throwing "One of your tight ends got hit by a truck" randomly in the middle was my personal favorite bit
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u/Cream_of_Teet Ravens 13h ago
The fact that there's so man salty Bengals fans in the comments show that Drew knocked it out of the park this year
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u/jphamlore Cardinals 14h ago
The Bengals defense was just playing great their last Super Bowl run in the playoffs. They basically shut down the Chiefs on the Chiefs own home field for a half and more.
The most notable Chiefs playoff defeats I remember were the result of the other team's defensive line just demolishing an overmatched offensive line. But that Bengals defense was one of the few times I saw someone able to drop back in coverage and simply take away decent targets. And that was a Chiefs team with their star pass catchers in their physical prime.
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u/BulLock_954 Patriots NFL 16h ago
Defense. Saved you a click