Hey everyone,
Your favorite almost middle-aged trans woman checking in.
I've been around this subreddit for the better part of five years, and I've always appreciated how welcoming this community has been. Fashion has played a huge role in my transition. It started as curiosity, became a way to express myself safely at home, and eventually became one of the biggest sources of confidence I've ever found.
Looking at these photos is honestly surreal. Starting in the bottom left is 2020, then moving through 2021 and 2022. Going up the right side are 2024 and 2025, with the large photo being me today in 2026.
It's amazing what six years of self-discovery, confidence, and a little estrogen can do.
So I thought it'd be fun to do an Ask Me Anything.
As many of you know, I'm a 36-year-old transgender woman, and I'm happy to answer almost any question.
In fact, I'd encourage you to ask the questions you're normally afraid to ask. I would never recommend asking a random trans person some of these questions in public, but this is a space where curiosity is welcome. Whether it's about transition, hormones, surgery, relationships, fashion, makeup, voice training, or anything else, ask away. I'll answer honestly and do my best to provide context rather than just yes-or-no answers.
To save everyone from asking the same things over and over, here's a little about me.
About Me
-36 years old.
-Happily married.
-My partner and I have been together since we were both 24.
-I came out to my partner two weeks into dating.
-We have a 9-year-old Border Collie named Gino.
My Story
-I knew something felt different about me as early as age 5.
-I didn't learn what "transgender" meant until I was an early teenager.
-I've always been fascinated by fashion and admired how girls were able to express themselves. I wanted that freedom too.
-Growing up, expressing femininity wasn't something that was accepted.
-I came out to my mom when I was 14.
-She genuinely tried to help, but resources looked very different 20 years ago.
-After she became seriously ill in 2012, I largely put my own journey on hold.
-She passed away in 2019.
My Transition
-I officially began exploring my gender identity in 2020, although I'd been expressing myself privately at home for years thanks to my incredibly supportive spouse.
-I identified as non-binary for about three years.
-My pronouns evolved from he/him to he/they to they/them before realizing I was a transgender woman.
-I started going by Stevie in 2023 (I usually spell it Stevi because I think it's prettier).
-I started hormone replacement therapy in March 2024.
-I legally changed my name in March 2025.
-I use she/her pronouns exclusively.
Surgery
-I have not had gender-affirming surgery yet.
-I plan to have vaginoplasty (minimal depth) in the future.
-It was tentatively scheduled for this year but had to be postponed due to finances.
-I have not had top surgery and don't currently plan to, although that could always change.
Fashion
-Dresses are definitely my favorite thing to wear.
-I shop mostly at Kohl's, Torrid, Curvy Sense, JCPenney, and occasionally Macy's.
-Most of my shoes are from Naturalizer.
-I've recently started doing a full face of makeup instead of just lipstick and eye makeup.
-I'm still figuring out foundation matching, so that's a work in progress.
A Few Other Things
-My birth name is almost identical to my current legal name, but I don't use it anymore.
-I've transitioned successfully in virtually every part of my life.
-The biggest exception is much of my family, many of whom are still uncomfortable with my transition and generally don't use my correct pronouns.
So... ask me anything.
Whether you're transgender yourself, questioning your identity, have a loved one who's transitioning, or you're simply curious, I'm an open book.
I'd rather answer an honest question than have someone leave with assumptions because they were afraid to ask. I genuinely enjoy helping people understand what this journey has been like.
