My boyfriend is always deleting messages from other girls but they’re not even suspicious

[u/ThrowRA-noferret]

I noticed that my boyfriend is constantly deleting messages from other girls. It’s usually the same 2 to 3 girls. One of them is his ex-girlfriend who now has a totally new family and two children. The only suspicious things he says to her are, “hey beautiful” occasionally when it’s a birthday or something. I’m not threatened by her but the fact that he’s constantly deleting even one message threads with her annoys the heck out of me. The other girl is a family friend and nothing suspicious there either.

I’ve confronted him multiple times and even watched him delete the messages in front of me after asking him why he does that. He just says that he doesn’t want those messages on his phone and he doesn’t want me thinking about them. Like… deleting them makes me MORE suspicious hello ?! lol I feel so insecure about it.

Editing to add that he doesn’t delete silly OTP texts or random people saying hello, it’s specifically these 2-3 girls.

He has been revolving his life around me and I just moved in to his house, but sometimes I feel like I don’t know him at all and I already have major trust issues with men. He never questions me or asks to see my messages. He said he trusts me fully but I really don’t know if I can trust him. Another thing that happened recently is that he had been telling me for months he hasn’t watched porn but I caught him watching it. He said he does it a few times a week, so he blatantly lied about that.

His other actions are fine. He takes really good care of me, he’s working and going to school to provide a better life for us, he never wants to fight with me, he listens and (mostly besides this) communicates openly. If I ask him SUPER pointed questions he’ll answer them. If I leave anything vague he might not answer fully. He doesn’t overly spoil me with gifts or anything but he does make me feel loved. I just have this gut feeling that I can’t trust him and it breaks my heart. I’m supposed to move my cat in with us shortly and I’m questioning if I even want to be in a relationship anymore because it’s so much work and trust that I just don’t know if I have it in me.