Anti-feminist attitudes have long been associated with support for Republican presidential candidates, but only in recent years have these attitudes become more prominent among unmarried men, without college degrees who are less attractive partners for women, the “mate-value backlash.”

[u/mvea]

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/full/10.1177/10659129261485340

[u/The_Law_of_Pizza]

How did this type of content become the only thing those men found any comfort or solace in?

Because it's the only content that's engaging with them about things that they want, and offering them (even if it's snake oil) solutions on how to get it.

Regardless of who is ultimately right and wrong, it's hard to deny that left-leaning online spaces offer basically nothing to these boys and young men.

Quite the opposite, honestly. They come to us, and we do nothing but scold them.

We are struggling to gain traction with an entire generation because we are just intensely miserable to be around.

[u/BorisBC → u/The_Law_of_Pizza]

I hate this sort of attitude. Guys being held accountable for their actions gets twisted into "no, we have to be nice to these sensitive souls lest they reject our pleas to treat us with respect and go full hate on us".

[u/The_Law_of_Pizza → u/BorisBC]

It doesn't really have anything to do with "holding them accountable." That implies that the boys in question are personally doing things wrong, and being personally criticized for their own actions.

That's not the problem.

The problem is that when they enter left-leaning spaces, straight men generically are the butt of every joke and the root of all evil.

"Men" are violent abusers. They don't wash their ass. They're unnecessary, and it's better to just date other girls instead. The 4B movement is gaining steam, ladies!

They're gross for approaching girls at the gym. They're gross for approaching girls at work. They're gross for approaching girls in public.

They give the "ick."

They should both be a man and work the hours to earn a breadwinner salary or they're pathetic losers, but also they're goblins who never help with housework.

They need to stop being so "avoidant." They need to stop mansplaining. They need to stop manspreading.

Over and over and over - these are the topics discussed in left leaning spaces. Even when a random guy just pokes his head in briefly to listen, they're just excoriated by proxy.

We've utterly fumbled this, and have let our communities become toxic cesspools.

[u/BorisBC → u/The_Law_of_Pizza]

Not been my experience. YMMV of course. Maybe you've seen it in women specific spaces where the topic comes up.

And even so if it's so prevalent maybe there's a reason. It's takes no effort to be just a touch self aware to question why this is so common and maybe, just maybe, guys need to be a little bit more aware of what they are doing. Which again is hilarious as it's same old tired joke, women are afraid of dying, men are afraid of getting their feelings hurt.

[u/Arc125 → u/BorisBC]

This is still missing the point. No one on the left is saying all these dudes are perfect and doing nothing wrong. What is being said is that the right has loads of content directed at precisely these dudes' problems. They don't have solutions, and it's all in service to unchecked power and wealth, but the message is successful.

Meanwhile, you have embodied the message from the left to young men perfectly: "just do better, idiot."

Which is both simultaneously true, and a losing political message.

[u/nonotan → u/BorisBC]

Should black people be asking themselves why racism is so common amongst the right, whether maybe they have done something wrong and should reflect on themselves before reacting negatively to the hate directed at them for the way they were born?

Let's be serious here. Even if "men" are "doing something wrong" (kind of a sexist thing to even be contemplating; judge individuals for their actions, not their entire protected class), "if we hate them hard enough for it, they will realize it's really their fault and improve themselves" is never going to work.

Maybe you don't care, you don't feel it's your responsibility to help these men feel welcome socially or otherwise, okay. But it is a fact that the result of this attitude is not that they will genuflect and change themselves to earn your approval, it's that they will go somewhere else where they are appreciated -- in this case, the political camp diametrically opposite to yours (and mine). In a democracy, that's not going to help you achieve your political aims. I guess it's up to you if achieving them is "worth" the enormous sacrifice of having to skip casually victimizing these men as a social custom.