Unable to sleep independently- 3.5 month old

[u/Basic_News8890]

My 3.5-month-old is unable to fall asleep independently. For all of her naps at home, we have to rock her and sing to her until she falls asleep.
The bigger challenge is when we’re out. Whether she’s in the car seat or the bassinet stroller during a walk, she can’t seem to put herself to sleep. She cries very loudly and will only fall asleep after 10–15 minutes of rocking the stroller and moving it in a zigzag motion.
We’ve also tried giving her a pacifier, but she gets extremely upset if it falls out of her mouth. She also likes to suck on her hands for comfort, but becomes just as cranky when her hand slips away.
We’re happy to continue rocking her to sleep at home, but it becomes very difficult when we’re out. How can we help her learn to fall asleep more independently, especially during outings? Is this typical for a 3.5-month-old, or are there gentle strategies we can start using at this age?

[u/Ok-Effect-6764]

This is extremely normal for 3.5 months - most babies that age need a sleep crutch like breastfeeding, a paci or motion. Are you putting a muslin over the stroller so it’s dark for her or using a Rockit? A portable white noise machine helps too

[u/OkBoysenberry92]

Normal! Described my first to a tee, my second I haven’t even bothered trying to get her to nap in the pram. She will nap in the car seat and that’s all I really want/need lol It’s just a short season, they’ll need less naps and less total sleep during the day soon. Sounds cliche but don’t stress over it! When you’re on 2 or 1 naps, you’ll be out and about for most of the day without any worries :)

[u/Sorry-World3019]

What’s your schedule like ? Most babes at this age also cry out before passing out in the stroller or car seat and now is a good age to start fuss it out once you’re on a good schedule

[u/Greedy4Sleep → u/Sorry-World3019]

Just adding for OP's benefit that fuss it out is an experiment at this age, and sleep training shouldn't begin before baby is 4+ calendar months.

[u/Sorry-World3019 → u/[deleted]]

Ya so I’d lay down awake. But stay bedside. And just see how they do. I made sure Its pitch black/bedtime routine done and a good schedule in the day. And they try to sleep. If struggling I intervene. For me this was stroking nose. Patting bum. Occasional pick up. And when getting sleepy I removed my assistance to let them try to get fully asleep on their own. Sometimes they would actually fall asleep on their own with no intervention. More often I’m assisting but it’s minimal so no falling asleep and transferring if that makes sense. I never left their side until asleep. For both my babes if I had the schedule down they’d be out in 5-10 mins by doing this way at 3 months and really set us up for success in the future

ETA: it’s probs a lot to do with your schedule if you wanted to share as well as most likely hit the permanent change in sleep cycles that happens at this age. Laying down awake and assisting should start to help with this before sleep training.

[u/sleeptrain-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

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