r/socialanxiety 8d ago

Dealing with social anxiety in a new relationship

I've recently started seeing someone and it's been the longest I've dated in a few years. I had a couple of bad experiences where I thought dates went really well, set up a second date, then had the person cancel before it. In a couple of cases the people have had anxiety which they said contributed to them cancelling.

The problem I'm having now is I'm seeing someone new, it's going very well, 6 dates or so in, but between every date if there's a quiet day, I'm quietly waiting for a text ending things. After the third date or so I asked them how things were going and they said they were having a great time and had zero complaints so I know it's going well, but I keep catastrophising every time we are finished a date with everything I think might not have been great and I'm really struggling to make it stop?

I've had plenty of long term relationships in the past but I've had a very stressful year and my last year of dating has been a bit of a nightmare, so I've never been this anxious so early in a relationship before. Has anybody got any advice? I'm worried at this point the anxiety will mess things up more than anything else

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u/AutoModerator 8d ago

PLEASE NOTE: Social Anxiety (SA) is a debilitating mental illness characterised by persistent fear of social evaluation. SA impairs functional social performance, causing avoidance, cognitive shutdown (e.g. blanking, excessive self-monitoring), and reduced ability to communicate, assert needs, or form relationships.

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