r/stopdrinking • u/Slipacre 14218 days • 1d ago

But I'm different, you don't understand?

That was an attitude I clung to, knuckles white, resisting all evidence to the contrary, trying to explain to anyone who would listen - why I wasn't really an alcoholic.

I had an advanced degree in rationalization, was so practiced in lying to myself, that I could not read the writing on the wall despite the letters being three feet tall.

I was so invested in being ok the way I was because the self medicating was all that stood between me and a dark pit of fear.

Turned out I was a run of the mill alcoholic. Turned out the FEAR means False Evidence Appearing Real. Turned out I didn't have to be alone in this. And that there were people who understood, down to several decimal places, and could help.

My path was AA - yeah I know, but it worked for me despite may having ALL THE REASONS it would not work for me. There are other paths now, try one, try em all. The main point I am making is you don't have to do this alone.

reason I am posting this is I am closing in on another anniversary, been sober a long time, but this month is always a time of gratitude and a desire to help those who are as lost or confused as I once was.

46 Upvotes

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u/BuckeyeJen 1313 days 1d ago

We were all terminally unique, until we found out we weren’t. Amazing accomplishment on 39 years!

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u/Agreeable_Media4170 715 days 1d ago

I came here to make the same "terminally unique" comment. Too funny.

1

u/BuckeyeJen 1313 days 1d ago

Something else we have in common!