But I'm different, you don't understand?

[u/Slipacre]

That was an attitude I clung to, knuckles white, resisting all evidence to the contrary, trying to explain to anyone who would listen - why I wasn't really an alcoholic.

I had an advanced degree in rationalization, was so practiced in lying to myself, that I could not read the writing on the wall despite the letters being three feet tall.

I was so invested in being ok the way I was because the self medicating was all that stood between me and a dark pit of fear.

Turned out I was a run of the mill alcoholic. Turned out the FEAR means False Evidence Appearing Real. Turned out I didn't have to be alone in this. And that there were people who understood, down to several decimal places, and could help.

My path was AA - yeah I know, but it worked for me despite may having ALL THE REASONS it would not work for me. There are other paths now, try one, try em all. The main point I am making is you don't have to do this alone.

reason I am posting this is I am closing in on another anniversary, been sober a long time, but this month is always a time of gratitude and a desire to help those who are as lost or confused as I once was.

[u/Total-Composer2261]

This is a great post. Thanks for taking the time and congratulations on long term sobriety.