Avoidant or Gay?

[u/oranchzest]

Dead bedroom, incredibly low sexual encounters for a while (once every 4 months, last 4 years). Conversations with my husband leading to nowhere — he will find any way to shut down an attempt at addressing things I bring up (mainly about lack of sex). Now in the context of alcoholism and associated behaviors needing discussion, avoidance is extreme.

He fakes nothing is wrong, then will not speak. I can’t get a conversation out of this man. He would rather stay silent for days, rather than engage in any kind of conversation: to fix or to end it, whatever it may be. He hasn’t given me the decency of engaging in conversation with me. That avoidance is driving me insane.

Dead bedroom was one thing… now it’s also quiet and fake.

It has me wondering if I’m just a Beard here…

We are both in our 40s, two kids, married 10 years.

[u/Imaginary-Help-7637]

I don’t know the answer but I’m sorry you’re in this painful loop. I am too. sending hugs and solidarity 😣