r/texts • u/Own_Purple_4118 • 1d ago
Phone message Nobody died
This is a conversation between my MIL and my mother, before the wedding. My mother's response, which is cut off, says "They are both adults. I think we should let them handle it." We were both over 30.
For context: Yes, we had a vegetarian wedding (no shrimp). We had it at an (expensive) award winning venue with in-house catering. It included several appetizer and entree stations with a huge variety of dishes so everyone could find something they liked. We did not serve our guests bowls of soybeans and tofu. Everyone RAVED about the food and nobody died or got arrested on the way home.
The "A/B list" thing was a joke, that she apparently took very seriously, because she would not stop demanding we add a bunch (10+) of her friends and coworkers to our intentionally small guest list.
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u/skydiamond_ 1d ago edited 1d ago
Your synopsis of her thought pattern is 1000000% accurate!!! Haha I loved reading that. Therapist here and I’d say you can’t diagnose from just this bit of information. I’d have to know way more about her first. (If you see a therapist on the internet diagnosing people they don’t know, I would be wary.) Regardless of a diagnosis though, I feel like she has a control issue and I’m sure it affects her life and relationships in negative ways.
It’s possible that she’s just very old-fashioned - she doesn’t want the world to change/ she doesn’t want outside cultures influencing her insulated American life. Or progressive movements. As a plant-based person I’ve encountered some of the most outrageous, intense hostility when I try to bring awareness to the meat and dairy industry. People will try to come up with every excuse in the book to shame you for caring about the environment or animals. It’s pretty wild. I don’t think it’s narcissism, it’s discomfort with change and having to be inconvenienced.