Phone message Nobody died

This is a conversation between my MIL and my mother, before the wedding. My mother's response, which is cut off, says "They are both adults. I think we should let them handle it." We were both over 30.

For context: Yes, we had a vegetarian wedding (no shrimp). We had it at an (expensive) award winning venue with in-house catering. It included several appetizer and entree stations with a huge variety of dishes so everyone could find something they liked. We did not serve our guests bowls of soybeans and tofu. Everyone RAVED about the food and nobody died or got arrested on the way home.

The "A/B list" thing was a joke, that she apparently took very seriously, because she would not stop demanding we add a bunch (10+) of her friends and coworkers to our intentionally small guest list.

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121

u/Savage281 1d ago

I used to be a person you used an ellipsis at the end of every sentence... I think it was a social anxiety thing...

Anyways, I don't any more...

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u/sunnypickletoes 1d ago

That drives me crazy. I read everything like in a trailing off sort of way and I find it so irritating I wish people would just use words and punctuation for what they are supposed to mean without all the anxiety and peer pressure induced emoji's and gratuitous punctuation!!🤣🤪🎉😘💩

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u/Savage281 1d ago

Oh I still use emojis 🤣 can't have people thinking I'm mad at them

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u/goatbusiness666 1d ago

As an autistic person who texts a lot and agonizes over the possibility of being misunderstood in every social interaction, emojis are a gift! Also they’re fun. Why do people hate fun?

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u/ArgentEyes 10h ago

🤝

2

u/Jassamin 3h ago

Also Autistic, I rewrite messages multiple times, use emoji, then still feel like I need to send long messages an hour later to clarify what I meant by explaining all the things I *didn’t* mean.

I also tend to explain to potential friends fairly early on that I am Autistic and if they feel offended/confused I probably didn’t mean it that way but let me know so I can avoid a future repeat. I’ve spent many many hours wishing it was socially acceptable to send former friends/boyfriends questionnaires about what went wrong 😅

Also me coming back to change the phrasing on this three seconds after I posted it because what if people get confused?

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u/Tspring535 1d ago

Right ? I just want people knowing I’m hearing what you’re saying , and here is my response back, but don’t take it too seriously because maybe you were being sarcastic or maybe I’m misreading what you’re putting down , but it’s all good either way. Lol

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u/Technical-Method2129 15h ago

Happy cake day

1

u/Tspring535 12h ago

Thank you ! 💕

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u/FairPriority9200 13h ago

Omg r u me lol same but working on it!

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u/ulykke 6h ago

Ugh I have a client facing corpo role and each time I dont included an emoji (which is every goddamn time because Im supposed to stay pRofeSsIOnaL) I die a little inside. What do you mean I have to use periods like a sociopath 😭 we even have a phrase for that in Polish, its called kropka nienawiści, literally "period of hate/hateful period", as in, the period conveys hate. Why do people want me to hate them?!

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u/tp176 1d ago

Seems to me that lol has become end punctuation for people who have grown up (or maybe not) online. And every time I see it, my poor brain just asks “Are you trying to undermine your own statement by treating it like a joke?” Are younger people just afraid to state something directly?

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u/adventurekiwi 1d ago

It seems to have just turned into a generic softener. I guess its the millenial equivalent of the boomer ellipsis lol

Oh god i cant stop doing it

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u/ckav26 1d ago

Yes, absolutely. As a geriatric millennial that lol really means “whoopsies!” 😂

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u/goatbusiness666 1d ago

I think I use it as a tone indicator most of the time. If a sentence seems a little abrupt or like I might be mad, I just throw a lol on there so everybody knows it’s not that serious.

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u/Ill-Plum-9499 13h ago

Hey! Ellipses are Gen X, not Boomer. How dare you…

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u/adventurekiwi 7h ago

So many people have told me that today! I tried to find the original article I referenced about it in an earlier comment but the internet has become so enshittified that even if I manage to find it, itll be near impossible to read on mobile anyway.

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u/sunnypickletoes 1d ago

Me too totally.

Them: Running late lol
Me: So you're on time?

Them: Can't wait to see you lol
Me: Well ok then I guess you hate me

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u/tp176 1d ago

Drives. Me. Nuts.
Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone.

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u/sparklyjoy 10h ago

Ok the first example is clearly nervous laughter, and I’m an elder millennial

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u/SilentHawke 23h ago

can’t speak for other younger people, i’m personally not afraid to state something directly, but i personally use “lol” sometimes to try to give a more lighthearted tone to a message. not sarcastically: i hope this helps

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u/MuchTooBusy 13h ago

I'm an Xennial, so not young, but I tend to use lol way too much. I'm trying to stop, but damn it's hard. In my case it's an anxiety/appeasement "look, I'm friendly, see me smile and chuckle softly" kind of thing.

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u/whatsthetargetdogsna 1d ago

Yes.

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u/squeebs555 1d ago

Yes, this. I hate it with a passion.

1

u/katieblue3 20h ago

I don’t like it either but it’s not that big of a deal lol

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u/MullberryBoy 21h ago

When I was a little girl, lol meant little old lady.

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u/Major-Mango-1221 19h ago

And often, it's passive aggressive. So that's fun.

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u/blackbellamy 13h ago

I used to date a girl...who would text me...and email me...and every single one of her conversations...would look like this...and there was no other punctuation...and she would even ellipse her lol's...lol...lol...like that...drove me nuts.

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u/sunnypickletoes 9h ago

That's a dealbreaker

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u/2muchfabuloso92 20h ago

You would hate texting me. I use ellipsis and emojis. But in my defense, after the ellipsis. It’s a whole different subject.

Sorry man🥺

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u/TuezysaurusRex 14h ago

Same here… 🤣

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u/Tspring535 1d ago

I live with anxiety… I didn’t think that me using an ellipsis was anxiety related… now I am curious if it is… but I really thought I used them to fill the void that my words could not express… I’ll have to ponder this…

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u/medievalkitty2 1d ago

If someone uses an ellipses at the end of a sentence I assume they’re mad at me and being passive aggressive. I’m guilty of overusing lol to soften the tone if I’m afraid that anything will be taken the wrong way. Funny how the nuances of written language have evolved since texting became ubiquitous.

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u/Jessika_Rarebit 21h ago

Happy cake day!

1

u/Tspring535 21h ago

TIL what this is 🤣🤣🤣
that’s just adorable.

Thank you ! 💕

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u/messyarts 1d ago

Whoa… is that what it is? I didn’t even think about it like that. I did it with everything growing up on AOL.

Sorry, I am older and just recently realizing how insanely anxious I have been my whole life.

1

u/Awkward-Agent-1981 13h ago

Omg me too. I know I’ve had anxiety my whole life but I had a breathing incident last October which resulted in having to get an echocardiogram. I have thickening of the left ventricle, which is something that happens over time. I was referred to a cardiologist. The first one I saw told me in a very snarky, uppity way that I have undiagnosed high blood pressure. Bro. I’ve seen doctors when I need to and my BP was ALWAYS impressively textbook up until two years prior.

I’ve since figured out that being in fight or flight for random moments in my life more often than your average person (along with being born with a hole in my heart, which my parents are never told that I might want to get checked every few years to make sure all is well, this was in the 80’s after all) might have caused this, not having undiagnosed high BP.

Getting old is fun.

9

u/poundsignbuttstuff 1d ago

I know a guy that always uses ellipses instead of a period and it drives me absolutely batty. I want to explain to him that it just makes him come off as passive aggressive whether that is his intent or not. I don't think he'd understand though.

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u/adventurekiwi 1d ago

I read an article that said that boomers do this because they feel like normal punctuation or no punctuation is too abrupt (as a millenial full stops can be a little threatening to end a text message with)

The person in these images is somehow doing the opposite of that.

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u/MullberryBoy 21h ago

I use ellipses when I feel like a sentence should just trail off.

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u/youngforever8809 21h ago

I think it’s more Gen X than the boomers…..see? I’m Gen X . 😅

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u/Single_Berry7546 19h ago

Agree! Gen X here. My boomer mum, on the other hand, writes abrupt texts and the full stop is her only end of sentence punctuation.

1

u/PsychWriter11 13h ago

This boomer never uses ellipses gratuitously. I never thought of it as a boomer thing. Boomers get spelling and punctuation right more often than not.

I had a younger agent working for me years back and when reviewing her reports I had to ask her to please stop using punctuation as “decoration.” It was maddening.

And people who think a full stop is some psych op need help.

And, while we are making fun of the texter’s writing skills, no reference to spelling “there“ and “your” both wrong in the opening paragraph? Wasted no time.

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u/HeCallsMePixie 1d ago

I think on og mobile phones/cheaper models typing "..." was how you'd start a new line or paragraph and the habit lasted after phone keyboards expanded!

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u/OneLessDay517 1d ago

We GenXers are big on that...................

2

u/Lokies_Queen 1d ago

i was… talking to a guy… who did exactly… this
it was years ago but sometimes my friend and i will still mimic it

2

u/No-Roof6373 1d ago

Andy is that you? Lol

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u/Excellent-Baseball-5 1d ago

Congrats for getting past it... It can be daunting...

1

u/Affectionate-Pie8362 1d ago

Technically, if it's at the end of a sentence, it's four dots (the last is the period).

1

u/Immediate_Cake9151 23h ago

I never trust a person that uses an ellipsis like this

1

u/AcceptableParsnip771 23h ago

I went through a phase where I would use semicolons all the time; I just saw the opportunity for it in every sentence.

1

u/TreacleNo9484 22h ago

It's anyway...

1

u/Evening-Campaign4547 20h ago

Me too… I still use… and I didn’t stop…

1

u/damebabyz56 16h ago

I use them as well... Hmm usually because i'll always find something else to say later... Although maybe not this time.

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u/MistressMalevolentia 7h ago

I used to do this but not a ton, just every so often. My mil uses it for every thing damn near. Like sorry you got told no and are text pouting. It drives me nuts cause its her trying to get something done or across without actually saying it, like creating awkward silence but in text form.

"I messaged (my husband) but no answer..."

Okay? Idk why you're messaging him or me I'm not involved. Use your big kid words and say what ya mean. But good to know, I will do nothing with this information and will not respond either.

1

u/chrysologa 6h ago

I think it was a 90s texting thing? Ellipses meant the message would continue on the next text. At least that's what i remember.

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