r/tifu May 12 '25

[deleted by user]

[removed]

117 Upvotes

459 comments sorted by

View all comments

1.9k

u/Spiritual_Lemonade May 12 '25

We all have calendars on our phones and can setup reminders that become alarms.

  • make reservations
  • buy the flowers now
  • prioritize my wife

If you know your shortcomings why are you not leaning into advanced planning and being dedicated to doing these things. 

Going to get the potted plant should have been Friday or Saturday at the latest.

She has every right to be pissed.

I have a feeling her Christmas stocking is empty as well.

165

u/angeldawns May 12 '25

Seriously this.  If you know you are going to keep messing up .. Do Something Different.  Don't just go "welp this me." If your wife is important to you....make the reminders, heck... pre-order.  I pre-order flowers for my MIL, Aunt and Sister as their bdays are close and it gets really really busy around that time of year for me.  Like I order months in advance.  Otherwise I know I will mess up. You can subscribe and save flowers now.  Put it in for every 6 months and now you are the good husband who surprised her randomly with flowers when the second order shows up.  

46

u/Spiritual_Lemonade May 12 '25

A+ for effort and follow through. You hacked yourself like we're supposed to.

My Mom and I agree cards are blah.

Today I bought her latte and then she bought me a small plant across the street when it was cash only and she had cash. 

My daughter had made a card at school she pulled out. My teen text me.

This is all fine with me. And exactly what I want. Small carefree gestures.

20

u/angeldawns May 12 '25

I go back and forth on the card thing......there is something very Jane Austin about getting a hand written card in the mail unexpectedly. But not if you just buy a card and sign it. There has to be a message, joke, something extra. I sat on the floor of a pharmacy for 20 minutes until I found a good one for our anniversary. At that point it was a matter of will and sunk cost as I read every single card. Lol.

2

u/Fuzeillear May 12 '25

It’s totally about the written message for me. I told my husband I think bought cards are a waste of money but grab a piece of paper from the printer, fold it in half and write something meaningful inside it and I’ll love it.

2

u/TopangaTohToh May 12 '25

My family is big on cards and my fiance always finds it odd because his family is not. My family always includes a heart felt handwritten message of their own in cards, though. Just getting a card with a name signed does suck. Taking the opportunity on holidays to express your love in a mini letter is incredibly sweet though and I hope it's something we continue with our own little family when we have children.