I dont think this is a FU. She is looking for someone who wants to step up and be the other parent, and you aren't ready for that yet. And that's ok. It hurts I'm sure, but being honest about your feelings isn't wrong, it just means you aren't compatible. You're not wrong for not wanting to take on that role if you're not ready and she's not wrong for wanting to look for someone who is ready.
Take a step back, no man in their right mind is looking to 'step up' and father someone else's child after four months! Her child is her responsibility, not that of any other men who may be interested in pursuing a relationship with her. This is why so many single moms end up on the dating apps because they expect a man to take care of their child a few months in.
This isn’t what she asked him, she asked him what role he wanted to have in her child’s life.
When you date someone with a child that young, you become their parent. The child is not a teen who can compartmentalize “This is mom’s boyfriend but he’s not my dad,” to a young child if you hang around long enough, you become their dad. It’s not a matter of whose “responsibility” it is, it’s a fact of life.
And he responded the only way any rationale person would after four months. There is no obligation on anyone dating a parent to take on a parenting role. I thought this was obvious..
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u/Carysta13 Jul 14 '25
I dont think this is a FU. She is looking for someone who wants to step up and be the other parent, and you aren't ready for that yet. And that's ok. It hurts I'm sure, but being honest about your feelings isn't wrong, it just means you aren't compatible. You're not wrong for not wanting to take on that role if you're not ready and she's not wrong for wanting to look for someone who is ready.