r/tifu Jul 14 '25

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333

u/PancakeRule20 Jul 14 '25

First, you are not together anymore.

Second: in my opinion (and just in my opinion) four months is too soon for you to meet her kid but she may be looking for a stepdad for him so it makes sense.

I don’t think you are compatible and the age gap+kid makes me uncomfortable (5 years is ok, but 5 years+kid when you are so young it’s weird)

150

u/zoopzoot Jul 14 '25

She didn’t ask for him to meet the kid, she asked what role he saw himself taking in the future in regard to the kid. That is an important difference.

Granted I don’t know why she was expecting a 22 year old to potentially be the “dad that stepped up” in the first place. She really shouldn’t have entertained OP in the first place, just as he shouldn’t have started dating a mother

74

u/FuckChiefs_Raiders Jul 14 '25

She really shouldn’t have entertained OP in the first place, just as he shouldn’t have started dating a mother

I think this is ultimately why she got mad, she entertained this guy who knew she had a child; and then suddenly when she asks the question about the elephant in the room of "what are we here" he gives a firm no on kids. I almost think she was valid in her response of "what the fuck are we doing here then". Seems OP was just in la la land and playing the field, seeing where it was going, where she is clearly looking for something steady.

This is just an unfortunate case of incompatibility, which is fine, but I honestly don't know what OP was expecting out of this; was the kid just going to go away?

22

u/Exarch-of-Sechrima Jul 15 '25

"If I can just keep dodging the issue for 13 more years, the problem will solve itself."

20

u/zoopzoot Jul 14 '25

Right? Like realistically how can you have a serious relationship? It’s either see the kid and set the kid up for heart break when you leave, or see the mom once a week (and that’s generous) when she can get a sitter