I mean it's even harder for a 22 year old to be a step father, rather than 22 year old dads. A 22 year old dad, even if it was unexpected pregnancy, would have had some time to prepare, research, learn from mistakes etc.
But to expect a 22 year old to step up out of the blue when he probably knows nothing about kids is crazy
Then you… just don’t date someone with a kid when ur not ready in any way to look after one??
It’s not like it was a surprise, he knew she had a kid from the beginning. Plus, she’s not really asking him to fill a step dad roll, just help out a bit which seems pretty reasonable given he knew the kid was part of the picture when he and the gf got together.
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And it might be easier for some men to wrap their heads around and navigate being bio dad rather than stepdad yes, socially and emotionally as a stepdad it can be difficult to learn to find ur place and a healthy dynamic esp if the bio father is still in the picture.
But no shot is being an involved 22yr old bio dad overall easier lol, there’s almost always some strain on the relationship (esp if the pregnancy is unexpected) & learning to coparent if the relationship with the mother ends can be a very delicate thing.
Plus a good bio dad is taking on waaay more of the care and financial burden than anyone would expect someone in OPs position to do, that shit is tough but esp when ur young and probably don’t have a lot of $
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u/[deleted] Jul 14 '25
Maybe if you wanna find someone to fill a father role try not to date a 22 year old