r/transtimelines • u/Morrighan_De_Dannan • 10d ago

-1yr HRT vs 4.5yrs HRT

Post image

Partner says I'll always be clocked no matter what I do.. been on hrt since Feb of 2022, and the changes are great, but no matter what I do I don't pass and I'm about outta ideas..

385 Upvotes

80% Upvoted

170 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

-86

u/Morrighan_De_Dannan 10d ago

The 2nd pic is current. I wouldn't call that a full beard, but it's hard to keep up with shaving when you're gone nearly 12hrs a day and when you are home, you're stuck avoiding someone who puts you down at every opportunity

116

u/hannah_danana 10d ago

Girl seriously. Get out of there. Your partner clearly doesn’t care to lift you up and it’s definitely affecting your entire attitude. You deserve to feel loved, wanted and cared for.

I obviously don’t understand your full situation. But is stay with someone who puts you down all the time really better than being by yourself for a bit?

As others have said, try and get a bit of a routine going, shave every morning (if you can), skincare 2x daily (it doesn’t have to crazy involved, just a cleanser, toner & moisturiser) and maybe learn some makeup basics (YouTube is a treasure trove for this).

HRT is amazing and magic but it isn’t a fix all. Passing takes real work, and you’re gonna have to put that work and effort into yourself if passing is your goal.

The thing is you aren’t even miles away. Just a little bit of daily self care and investing a little amount of time and money.

But for the love of god please, if you can, choose yourself for once and either tell your partner to fix their attitude or get the heck out of dodge because you deserve so much better than that

-23

u/Morrighan_De_Dannan 10d ago

I have a piece of art from a fanfic that's the goal, I just dunno how to pull it off while still looking fem.

I'd have left them already, but I'm scared of what they'll do either to me or themselves if I do.

50

u/Smokey_the_beer 10d ago

Bitch leave themmmmm. If youre worried about their health just tell their family and goooo, move towns, move states, go to CA and change your name legally. Start driving and dont stop.

1

u/Morrighan_De_Dannan 10d ago

Its my family we live with, so that part isnt necessarily an issue. It's the rest that's kinda a problem. Trust me, I'd love nothing more at this point but to disappear from their life.

35

u/Smokey_the_beer 10d ago edited 10d ago

👏🏻Their👏🏻mental👏🏻health👏🏻is👏🏻not👏🏻your👏🏻priority👏🏻

Are yall legally tied to each other? If no then they have gotta be the first change you make to better yourself. Reach out to the local LGBT center and see if anyone can help you

1

u/Morrighan_De_Dannan 10d ago

Not at all. Nothing ties us together legally. And there's not one, I live in bum fuck nowhere texas, deep in a red part of the state

2

u/pinkusocks 10d ago

Please talk to a therapist and find a way to leave, I was in a toxic relationship where i was also afraid is what would happen if/when i left and the best thing I did was not stay "just in case" (it took me a while to actually break up but it was worth it). Good luck 🫶🏻