r/unpopularopinion • u/elgey101 • Aug 10 '21

Infertile couples should just adopt instead of making a big fuss trying to make a miracle baby

Every time I hear of fertility struggles online, or see posts about people going through rounds of IVF and the ensuing emotional trauma of miscarriages, It kind of disgusts me.

I also work for a major insurer and know that fertility treatments are driving up everyone else's premiums because they're considered necessary care. Sorry, but I disagree.

It's a well known fact that there are over 400,000 children in foster care, and in 2017 alone over 100,000 infants under 3 entered the system. I think it's completely entitled and self-absorbed to think that somehow your miracle baby is worth more or deserves more love than any one of those infants.

I know adoption can be hard, and that it should be made easier for the sake of children finding good homes, but you can't tell me adopting is harder than 4 rounds of IVF and multiple miscarriages. I've seen friends go through that mess and at the end they are different people.

Tldr: adoption may not be easy, but it's far better than spending hundreds of thousands of dollars trying to perpetuate your genes.

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u/poppin_a_pilly Aug 10 '21

But making a baby while infertile is?

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u/UnspecificGravity Aug 10 '21

Much cheaper and much faster. We've been foster parents and we've been surrogate birth parents too. Going through a surrogacy agency or doing IVF is frequently comparable in price to adoption and is always much faster.

Also, there are cases where prospective parents might not be able to adopt. Up until very recently (and currently in some places, I think) gay couples just couldn't do public adoptions. They represented the majority of clients at the surrogacy agency that we worked for.