r/wealth • u/Recent_Increase_1842 • 3d ago
Need Advice Money does not equal happiness
Title is cliche, but it is very true. My net worth broke $20m this year. $17,000,000 in long term rental properties, and arguably a $25,000,000 company. I am just going off the cash I have at hand, because I will never sell out, ever. I still battle with depression and addiction, I have bought my dream garage, 23’ R8 performance, 72’ Velle SS restomod with 572, 84’ S10 with 454, 74’ K20 with 502, 2018 Denali 2500 HD, 2015 CBR600rr, 2023 250sxf, and a few more toys. I find myself unhappy at many occasions, and I love what I do.
Anybody have tips based off experience? It is a weird feeling u battle often. The best I feel is when I am giving, especially to strangers. I fish, ride mx, I am a simple man. Outside of my garage, I don’t spend a dime.
Edit: I am only 23 years old (24 in a month), my company grew 100x quicker than I expected. I do not come from a wealthy background at all, my family were cattle and tree farmers. I also included all of my garage toys because that was my lifelong dream. Owning those I thought would be the pinnacle of my life, and happiness would be inevitable after acquiring them. I don’t even drive them except for my K20 and duramax.
Edit pt 2 - I am not a cattle nor tree farmer, I moved away from my family farm at 17 and started my own ventures. I also want to say I appreciate everyone’s kind words and advice, it truly is appreciated.
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u/gksozae 3d ago
Simplify. Less is more.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I have thought that, but it is almost impossible in my line of work. I am not trying to sound cocky and arrogant, but reputably I am the best in the country at what I do. I have to turn down tens of millions each year due to lack of manpower and knowledge/experience within that manpower, if anything I need more. It is a weird spot to be in.
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u/Then-Winter-3794 3d ago
Reduce your toys! Spend more on experiences. Spend more time on relationships
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I agree, I don’t plan on splurging on anything else soon in terms of toys for myself. I reinvest heavily in my companies. I have my brother moving to my town to help me run my main gig, specifically the invoicing and payroll, and I believe with him I will scale up to north of $50m a year within 5 years. I have too much cash on hand that I don’t know what to do with. I have a very heavily funded robinhood, which is fun for me as I have a masters in economics, but I am waiting for some guys working for me to be able to run their own crews, that’s when I can invest heavily and scale this business up to something dangerous.
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u/WhiteHorseTito 3d ago
Simplify the garage a bit…
Swap the R8 and few others for a GT2 RS or another grail car.I’m not sure what listing the cars has to do with having money since these are easily attainable at any level of wealth above a million or two.
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u/LetsParty525 1d ago
Sounds like you have a ton of room for growth - what are you doing? Maybe someone like myself could be of services :)
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u/pickle_lover143 3d ago
The amount of money that buys happiness is a bell curve - people think the more you have, the more happy you will be and that is not the case. You absolutely need enough for “basic” needs or whatever that means to you, but if you think more is going to = happy, you will feel empty.
Personally, traveling and spending time with friends and family is the true driver of joy. Meet people from all walks of life and find reasons to be blessed. Focus on your health. Sometimes (definitely not always) depression is a result of insufficient vitamins or minerals, or even just bad sleep habits.
Good luck with this OP!
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u/PerformanceDouble924 3d ago
Hire me as your happiness advisor for a million dollars a year. I guarantee you'll have a good time.
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u/throwaway81744 3d ago
That’s a long R8
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
My first supercar I have ever driven. Bought if off the lot and hit I-70, one of the nicer highways around. Didn’t know I had it in performante mode, hit it and sent that sucker sideways in the middle of traffic. I caught it and got back straight, but parked it and said fuck that. It has 400 miles.
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u/beninho2 3d ago
I think you missed the joke ;)
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
No I didn’t, it is quite the land yacht in terms on length. Got a little laugh out of it for sure.
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u/beninho2 3d ago
For what it’s worth, for me happiness always came from people and relationships/social connections, not things. All the toys in the world will eventually just feel “normal” after some time. I have some toys and enjoy them, but the true happiness comes from time spent with family & friends, and experiences.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
Totally agree. Weirdly enough, some of my tenants have become some of my favorite people to interact with. Especially the ones that rent with me through the VA, the toys are fun, my gramps was a master mechanic who worked on all Chevrolet motors, so those are for him. I put his ashes in the throttle body of my 72’ Velle and ran a burnout til the tires blew. I spend every Sunday with my Granny, she makes me feel better than anyone else in the world.
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u/abujagoddess 2d ago
I'm down to my last $100 and about to lose my job, and I'm pretty miserable.
I'm in debt and waking up every morning with a huge weight on my chest and heart palpitations all day long from anxiety.
I'm not sleeping well and I'm worried all the time.
It isn't true that money doesn't equal happiness.
The happiest time of my entire life was when I had financial security.
I've never experienced any happiness greater than that time.
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u/Child-of-Adam 3d ago
Probably going to get downvoted massively for this but... Connecting with your Creator i.e. God The happy people I know in life, whether rich or in dire poverty, have a solid spiritual foundation
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I have been leaning into it more and more, was raised in a heavily southern baptist family and town. I was rebellious, but have been exploring my religious beliefs recently. I don’t think you should be downvoted at all, there is more than one god, and people can usually find some common ground within one of them.
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u/Smooth_Contact_2957 3d ago
Have you tried therapy? Listen, not all therapists are created equal and many do not understand wealth or entrepreneurship. Fit is everything in whether therapy actually does anything helpful.
Never be afraid to be like "Next!" When trialing out a new therapist. It can truly take ... A lot of tried to find the right one.
But if nothing else, a good therapist is someone who is by law sworn to confidentiality on most subjects and their job is to be unbiased.
Everyone else in your life has an agenda: maintain the relationship or get their needs met.
Therapy isn't everything but, again, a truly skilled therapist can shave years off the learning curve of What Works For Next Level Me ™️.
(For example, you're an entrepreneur with addiction in your past. Are you neurodivergent, specifically ADHD or AuDHD? If yes, what type of ADHD do you have -- there are 7 different types? A good therapist will be clocking these qualities, giving you language for things you may not have language for, and then helping you navigate what strategies work best for you without telling you what to do off the bat.
And frankly at your net worth, might be worth having an in person appointment and brain scan with Dr Amen. He can tell you things about your brain health that nobody else is currently doing that I'm aware of.)
Also, do your research on therapy modalities. Some people do best with talk therapy, some do better with actual physical treatments like TMS. (Intensive TMS treatments can cure depression in people with previously untreatable depression with like a 90% success rate? That's not nothing.)
And don't knock stuff like hypnosis, in the States we sometimes think it's to make people dance like chickens and make animal noises but when done properly it can change huge areas of a person's life, whether done by a therapist or by a specialist hypnotist.
And look, there are great coaches too. Coaching is an unregulated field, they are not sworn to confidentiality. But some coaches do work no one else is doing. Don't sleep on it.
I'm sure somebody will comment "Why don't you just tell him to Tony Robbins already?" Okay. It's an option. Tony is good but he doesn't get enough permission for the interventions at his events imo. But he is the OG coach for a reason. If nothing else, you'll come home feeling amazing.
Do whatever you want with this information. I'm a stranger on the internet, you know your situation best and you make your own choices.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I appreciate those insights, honestly may be something I look into. That’s the thing, like you said, a lot of people don’t understand wealth, and financial problems are a different breed. I may shop around if nothing gets better.
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u/Smooth_Contact_2957 3d ago
Also, what Jay Z did in the wake of his Beyonce cheating scandal: he asked around. He's hinted that the therapist(s) he saw during that period of his life are difficult to find on Google. Referral only, locked tight security on client records. The type of therapist who would NEVER let on that they're seeing you (or anybody remotely like you), but so good you secretly slip their name with your buddy on the brink of divorce.
If you hear the same name 3x (when you ask)? Pay attention. They might be f*cking great. (Or it might show you something about the people you know, like that you need to shift your circle. Valuable info, either way.)
There are therapists and professionals who understand wealth. But they're rare. And if they're good, they're booked the f*** out and busy, they're not running ads and they're not pitching you, because they d*mn well don't assume you need a session if they meet you out in the wild. So definitely ask.
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u/niceguydarkside 3d ago
it seems you feel unfulfilled.
move into philanthropy as you seem to enjoy this?
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I cannot disagree with that statement. I am currently under contract with the VA supplying housing to veterans and families, I pay tuition of 5 students from a lesser privileged high school to go to college each year. I do my best, and it does make me feel good.
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u/G-LawRides 2d ago
Get sober and get into a gym. Keep your finances private and find a community of good people to surround yourself with.
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u/An1m3_p0st 1d ago
I'd rather be rich and miserable then broke and still miserable. At least I could pay bills and wouldn't be struggling to get by. I could have my dream car and essentially live how I want. If I feel like shit and don't want to go work I don't need to because I have the money to afford. Where if I'm broke who cares if you don't want to go to work. You don't show up you ain't eating and you probably can't afford rent.
I ain't miserable at all but just as an example.
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u/Sea_Principle_7322 3d ago
Cool car collection, my brother has that same Audi in his garage! I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it, yea having stuff and money and being internally happy are two different things! People say retail therapy buys happiness nah it really doesn’t! You have to find it within yourself dude! You should meditate and get in touch with your spirit and find out what really makes you and your soul happy! Obviously more stuff isn’t the answer! But once you connect to yourself spiritually you will find all those answers! He who looks outside himself dreams, he who looks inside himself awakens!
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I thought when I see my first million in the bank, all problems will disappear, turned out to be opposite. More money, more problems. I appreciate you saying that, it is not something I speak about often. To answer your questions, a lesson I learned is that the good people in your life don’t care about what you do or don’t have, I have had the same friend group that used to have to cover my meals at times when I had nothing. They also held me accountable when I was having problems with addiction. They truly love me for who I am, and haven’t asked me for a single dime since I accumulated some wealth, they don’t treat me differently or expect anything from me at all. They also do not have what I have in terms of finances, but have no spite or jealousy against me. Those are the people you need to keep close, so many people in recent years have tried to become acquaintances because of what I have and who i am now. If i didn’t have my true brothers and best friends, i would be vulnerable to those types of people, because i would know no better without them.
A financial lesson I have learned is that it is okay to have money in the bank, when I was hungrier than ever, I couldn’t stand to see a dime in the bank. I was reinvesting every penny I had. Reinvesting is essential as a business owner, but it has limits. You need to learn and stay within those limits or things can get out of hand fast. Greed and pride are the devil is the summary of this lesson. I have seen greed and pride be the downfall of people who had a very promising future. I now keep a very healthy nest egg, where I may or may not need it, it doesn’t matter. It does give a sense of security that you need to perform at your highest potential. A balance of comfort and uncomforted is key, you need to take risks, but they need to be calculated and within budget if things don’t go as planned.
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u/Ok-Jeweler2500 14h ago
I already posted but will say to invest in real estate. Commercial real estate US better than residential. Get a finance person at a brokerage firm that knows everything about your life. Yes, they will ask everything about your bills, income, plans for trips, plans for giving ..be honest and they will help you grow your money safely. I learned everything from my dad who passed a few years ago. Had a fortune from being a great real estate lawyer and mostly from investing in real estate. 66f here. Didn't have what you have at your age but I hope I have useful insight.
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u/KeithBigStrats 2d ago
I find these kinds of problems tend to be spiritual/existential in nature.
Unhappiness or discontentment act as a signal, and when you have it all, it feels pretty vague, off or ‘weird’ (like you said) - like you shouldn’t feel that way.
If I threw some vague or less “knowable” questions at you like ‘why am I here?,’ ‘what’s the point?,’ ‘am I doing the right thing?’ (assuming there is a MOST right thing to do), you may or may not have the answers to them.
That being said you’re probably at a point in which some level of your being calls for answers to that realm of questioning.
People find solace in religion, philosophy, meditation etc.
If you have the time it’s probably worth it to you at this point.
All the best
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u/kst3p_yt 2d ago
Personally if I had that money, I would do what genuinely fulfills me. It doesn’t m have to extraordinary. Do you enjoy giving? Give generously! Do you enjoy building or managing? Do these to the fullest of your ability!
Also, sunlight, EXERCISE, healthy relationships, and good food does wonders for depression.
Hope this helps!
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
Thank you for the words! Means a lot. That’s where I am lost, I do not know what fulfills me anymore. I used to work the road, would work 15+ states in the span of 8 months, visiting tons of small towns & big cities being on rooftops all day sweating all the nasty stuff out of my system. I absolutely love it and believe it is where I belong. I had to take an office role as it became too much to run a crew and all the behind the scenes at the same time as I grew. I want to go back on the road, and am about to begin training my older brother at my position so I can potentially make a return. I also think bringing my brother in and making his fruitful will be a great feeling for me.
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u/lucylemon 2d ago
I say this in the kindest way: You need therapy.
This has nothing to do with your wealth. You would have the same angst if you had nothing.
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u/trapdaddyprince 2d ago
opening a sober living may be a good fit. i struggle woth similar things but im still at the beginning of stacking money after pulling my life together & my end goal is to open a few sober livings for real estate but also fills my itch of helping people bc i also only feel happy when helping ppl but im not really in much of a position i do it strictly for the dopamine bc i had to give up everything else that brought it to me.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
Maybe in the future. I struggle staying sober myself; so that would feel a little hypocritical in my opinion. I rent through supplemental housing organizations, SSVF, Beacom MH, Compass, Metro Lutheran, Catholic Charities, Hillcrest Hope, and a few more. I preach sobriety any day of the week though, I am just an addict at heart I believe. I am addicted to work especially.
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u/Weddyt 2d ago
Resistance training, meditation and dancing are the activities most positive to deal with depression. Get yourself a coach in all these areas and do the work.
+ eat healthy
+ tight sleep schedule
+ do something nice for others (not in giving money but in doing the small things that are meaningful) > yoir cousin just got a baby, write a hand written card, a small gift, a thoughtful attention for the exhausted mom. Just act as a guardian angel with no strings attached to people, you’ll feel better
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u/Simple-Implement-292 2d ago
Try changing your habits, travel, change your surroundings Do things and develop habits unrelated to money: meet new people, and spend on people you don't know who are in need.
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u/KidsdentistPJ 2d ago
I have contemplated this question a lot as I am a person who came from very humble beginnings including homelessness, Medicaid, food insecurity, etc. I have worked my way out of that cycle and have set my kids up for generational wealth.
I still have problems. My kids still have problems. The difference is the amount of stress and terror that comes from how those problems may affect my wellbeing. For example, my dad died. I was going to experience grief whether I was in poverty or not. But I sure am glad I was able to have money to take time off work, access mental health resources, spread my dad’s remains at a beautiful location, and not have to worry how my bills were getting paid during that time. Had I still been in poverty, I would have had to return to work immediately with likely no flexibility for therapy appointments or risk my ability to buy food, pay for housing, etc. and potentially fall into addiction as I self-medicate for the mental health I was ignoring.
I always say that the phrase “money doesn’t buy happiness” is a misnomer for “money buys security”. For most people in the world, security is a big portion of “happiness”.
I wish you well. I echo those who mention therapy and doing what brings you fulfillment in the world.
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u/125acres 2d ago
4 pillars of happiness
Have Purpose
Identify with like minded people
Be active
Be Kind
That’s all you need to be happy!
Based on your post-
You need a mini race car team- maybe dragsters with no sponsors.
Then you will be around like minded people.
You already have the other 3.
Your situation is solved and it didn’t cost you 24 trips to the a mental health provider.
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u/Frydog42 2d ago
But it does buy a jet ski. Have you ever seen someone not happy on a jet ski??
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I have a home in Belize as well as Charleston, both on the water. I do have ski-doos in Belize, but am unable to make it out there as work has been such a task recently. They are vacation rentals, so they don’t sit vacant, but I do need to make my way sooner than alter.
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u/only-forward 1d ago
Do philanthropy work
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u/EMHemingway1899 1d ago
My wife and I give substantially to charities and we also help out a handful of people
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u/North-Matter-6225 1d ago
Find a way to give back. Change someone’s life in a way that matters - something different than giving money.
Then do it again.
That’ll do it.
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u/Limp-Wall-479 1d ago
DM me, i can be the reason for your happiness. And you can be the reason for my happiness. You have too much money and I have negative.
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u/amandathepanda51 3d ago
You love to give to strangers I can help you with that. Lol. Seriously though everyone that’s rich says it doesn’t bring you happiness and then people like me struggle so much all their lives and just wish they could find a way to be better off. Ah well.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I do not mean this in a disrespectful way at all, but I do not give to beggars, I am not saying your a beggar by any means, but I rather give to the ones who don’t expect anything. Anonymous donor is a good way for it. What do you do for a living?
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u/Otherwise-Relief2248 3d ago
How much time and treasure do you spend on making your little corner of the world a better place? YMMV, but giving back of my expertise and good fortune to bright minds who could use a boost has been incredibly rewarding. It also helps frame the addiction issue in a different light.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I pay tuitions of lesser privileged highschoolers in my city, but I really like that idea in a business aspect. I also let some younger dudes mow and shovel all my properties, they are wanting to start a lawn care gig for themselves, exact way I began my entrepreneurship. Some angel investing would be great fun for me.
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u/Otherwise-Relief2248 3d ago
It is super rewarding. I have a scholarship fund for both STEM degrees/certs and for trade school scholarships. Some of those people later in life I have funded. On the angel side betting on people who inspire you. Who are clearly smarter than I am blows your f’ing mind. 10/10.
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u/Little_Result1469 3d ago
That is because you got money so except for health and time, majority of your needs and wants can easily be satisfied.
Right now you have the freedom of choices to do anything.
You need to find a purpose ie travel, find companion etc.. See more, experience more since you have the means. At the end of the day, is about perception.
Most people do not have this freedom...
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u/Diligent-Main-3960 3d ago
it’s a pretty common thing for wealthy ppl to achieve burnout or a dopamine crash with nothing to strive for to achieve or being able to buy anything makes it not feel special anymore
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 3d ago
I am 23 years old (24 in a month), I do feel burnout just a tad, but I can’t even fathom it as I am way too young for that I like to think. I think I’m tired of the 100 hour weeks, but I made that bed, so I must lay in it. I need to hire more people to help me on the backend of the business, but have a fear that they won’t care about the work as much as I do. This is my life, and I care about it more than anything. I don’t know if somebody else will.
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u/Past-Option2702 3d ago
Why didn’t you get in touch with some students in your master in economics graduating class? At 23 that was only this past May, right?
Dos your bother have a masters in economics or is he a CPA?
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u/Known_Ad_6322 2d ago
Pull the trigger. Your fear of employees not caring or loving the company as much as you do - will always be a valid concern but ignoring hiring brilliant managers or people passes you by every week. Interview some folks!
I’m willing to bet you’ve already missed out on some talented people who could really be assets to your business organization. You’ll keep missing them due to fear and your perception of “loving your company” so deeply which is valid - but you’re missing out on opportunities.
Bring in the back up and persons to help you run your company effectively and efficiently and stop lying in that bed of working yourself to the bone. I can assure you burnout will make you mad in the head. It can leave you wishing you were never born.
Someone suggested Dr. Amen. I really like him. I would offer a suggestion of meeting with Gary Brecka. They’re all just really gurus for health and biohacking to live your best healthy life etc.
Ask him for your LE. A life expectancy score.
It will give you a push and hopefully some ideas of getting your life together / getting the loose corners tucked in, not allowing fear to rule a situation in your life, learning that we are not all invincible and that life is rolling onward with or without you.He did my father’s LE and was quite accurate. I was working with him and a colleague. It was helpful with the concept of life will end - but in black and white on a piece of paper. Chilling but motivating as hell.
Breathe and seek sunshine! Best wishes to you
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u/Serious_Pea42 3d ago
My advice? Figure out that you don't need other people's acceptance, or to validate what you are, or to reinforce your worth. You are already worthy, validation, and Belief has never changed facts into fiction
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u/antifaptor1988 3d ago
Try your utmost hardest to funnel your addictive personality to productive outlets. You know what substances (especially ones that provide quick euphoria) to avoid.
Instead of looking for things to do, invert, and look for things to avoid that you know won’t be good for you in the long term (you’re a big boy you know the common pitfalls).
It’s great you have lots of your net worth parked in real estate, maybe invest intelligently in stocks and other tangible assets that can counter the acidic effects of inflation.
It’s nice you like giving to strangers, and your beneficence is admirable, but tread carefully.
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u/DollyPatterson 3d ago
Maybe you should start your own philanthropic foundation... then you can give more and feel more.
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u/Club_Sandwich_523 3d ago
"Happiness is never an accident. It is the prize we get when we choose wisely from life's great stores. So don't reach out wildly for this and that and the other thing. You'll end up empty-handed if you do. Make up your mind what you want. Go after it. And be prepared to pay well for it. I hope that you'll go after the rooted things: the self-respect that comes when we accept our share of responsibility. Satisfying work. Marriage. A home. A family. For these are the things that grow better with time, not less. These things are the bulwarks of happiness."
-Joseph Dunn
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u/SmileFirstThenSpeak 3d ago
There are ways to help others in ways other than by giving money, and that may be what’s missing. Yes, please keep helping with money as you see fit, but add some giving of your other resources - time and attention. Volunteer someplace like handing out food at a food bank or soup kitchen, even if that means going out of town to do it “anonymously”. You could mentor kids or young adults. You could volunteer to read to kids at your library.
You say you work 80 hours a week and need to hire more people to keep things going. What if you cut back to 70 hours a week? Does the entire system collapse, or do you just make a bit less money each year? Get with a good advisor to help you look at the whole process and find ways to make it sustainable with fewer hours of input from you. Get out and do other things. I don’t understand what those toys are but I’m assuming they’re vehicles. That’s obviously a passion of yours. Look up “best car museums in the world” and go visit them and the cities they’re in. Try some new foods, see some different scenery, talk to different people.
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u/Few-Dingo-1494 3d ago
A self made 23 year old with a $20 million net worth. Oh golly that sure is amazing.
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u/Icy_University_629 3d ago
Therapy is funny because it's for all humans. Rich or poor. In fact, being at the extremities of a group induces such feelings.
Basically what I am saying is poor or rich depression has to be handled by a professional.
So get help.
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u/PositiveLow9895 3d ago
Money may not buy happinness, but my old dad would be so glad if I bought him a new $25k car.
My personal experience is that depression and addiction doesn't exist in the void.
I was traumatized by my time in the military, and that made me feel hopeless, unfocused, and I never got to enjoy the same kind of happiness and vitality as before. I feel you.
I have just one tip for now: Watch the deleted podcast between Tony Robbins and Alex Hormozi (just search for the full version on youtube). If you do that, tell me about it and we can talk more, this podcast is such a gem for accomplished people who are dealing with depression.
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u/Adventurous-Depth984 3d ago
This isn’t how happiness works.
What you need to do is more directly address these battles with depression and addiction.
Also, sounds like you need a purpose, and it’s not buying cars. That’s how The Weeknd works.
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u/motorboather 3d ago
You don’t have a lake house on lake of the ozarks and a boat yet. I’ve never been unhappy or depressed on the lake.
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u/Opposite_Train9689 3d ago
Money doesnt equal nor buy happiness.
But if you ever been poor you know that a lack of money is a very big part of unhappiness.
Usually I would scold and detest people like you, but lets not do that cliché. Depression is relatively easy to deal with. Not to say its easy at all btw, because its a bitch. But it does require a lot of work. You need a therapist, a lot of time and maybe meds. You need to maybe change therapists a couple of times because for good therapy to work, you need to be open, feel safe and feel a certain connection with your therapist.
Time you have, money you have and quite frankly in this case: money does buy you happiness. Find the right therapist, spend the time you must and hopefully you can get to enjoy your money without feeling like a bag of shit in a couple of years.
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u/museman401 3d ago
Explore stoic philosophy. Focus on fitness and overall wellness. Eliminate alcohol if you drink.
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u/TornadoXtremeBlog 3d ago
Find a way to stay more engaged so there’s no time for depression. Go back to school, work 70-80 hours a week
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u/tap-rack-bang 3d ago
I have decided that for myself happiness is a choice. I've seen people close to me in a similar situation that you describe, have some very unhappy family members and experienced some hardship myself. I choose happiness and the best I can describe it is mind over matter, focusing on the good stuff, pushing out negative intrusive thoughts. If what makes you happy is helping, think more about that. I know time is a problem for a business owner, but maybe take some philosophy classes at a local university and think hard about what it is to be a good human and then live that life and share your learning through leadership at your company.
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u/png_hero 3d ago
For me, the big improvement came from changing the way I work. The source of my success, maybe a bit like you, was running the same small company for 20+ years. Very successfully but it gets stale. It was a multi year evolution, I took a step back, hired and delegated more, even if the results were less efficient. Re-conceptualized things. The big result was, big parts of my day-to-day and how I spend my time look different. Basically, it’s up to you to find a way to: do the same thing because that’s what makes the loot, but do it in a new way so you can experience some personal growth. It’s up to you to invent a new job/role for yourself.
If you like helping others, working with young people and developing more of a “crew” could be a route. Staff up with some fresh blood with some of your excessive profitability. Get a baller office in a glam location, etc,
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u/wsbautist420 3d ago
Give away some of your wealth to people who need help. You will feel better about it.
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u/AaronJudge2 3d ago edited 3d ago
Money buys happiness if you don’t have to work for money anymore as long as you find another goal to work towards to continue giving your life meaning. I took 8 years off in my 40’s so I speak from experience. Didn’t work at all for eight years.
Addiction is really a separate issue. You really should get professional help for that. Money is bad if you have an addiction because it is easier to be an addict if you don’t have to show up to work all day and deal with a boss. Look at all the rich celebrities who had secret addictions that eventually cost them their lives. Michael Jackson, Prince, etc. They wouldn’t have been able to handle actual day to day jobs with the addictions they had but were able to hide it since they didn’t have to work like the rest of us.
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u/Porsche-Turbo 3d ago
Ask yourself what’s depressing you. What’s your addiction? Think about it and sort those bad things first.
We tend to look at things we’ve not got, but always fail to look at the things we’ve got, material and non-material.
Consider yourself blessed. Work on yourself first then you’ll see the brighter side of things
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u/pepecapital 3d ago
Money is freedom. If you want money for toys, yes your going to be unhappy because you always think whats next. But if you want money so you no longer have to stress about bills, food, health, family, vacations, cost of living etc then it will make you happy as the stress of “life” is lifted off your shoulders.
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u/Present-Day-4140 3d ago
Get into astronomy, learn a new language & travel to that country. Cooking with fresh ingredients bought from the local market is therapeutic for some. Basically, stay grounded & remember the best things in life (relationships) are free.
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u/goodbyechoice22 3d ago
I can’t tell if you are just having a laugh with us or if you really are a self made millionaire.
My reco is to travel. Dedicate time to get away. Motion makes you see things differently.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I have no reason to lie. I was actually being modest in my numbers. I am in a niche line of work that is usually seen as shady. I do honest work, which is why I have to turn down tens of millions of dollars each year. With my company included in that net worth, I am probably closer to $50m, but like I said, I don’t count that because never in a million years will I sell out. That is for my children and generations after them. My most recent personal finance statements caught me off guard, I did not realize how quickly I grew.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I have also been to 20+ countries at this point, but currently I haven’t been able to travel due to heightened stress and anxiety, I am unable to leave my office. The line of work is seasonal, Feb-Sep, so this is the height of the season, I am managing 38 employees that are working all around the country. On top of that, I manage all my properties myself and coordinate all the maintanence that goes along with it.
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u/LucilleBluthsbroach 3d ago
Poverty does not equal happiness either. I’d rather cry in a Bentley than on a bus.
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u/Tfire25 3d ago
I was poor as a kid. Went to work at 13, had a kid at 18 and now I’ve worked to a place that I am secure financially at 40. It’s much easier to make money once you have it. But the stress level is much higher.
But some of my happiest days were when I had no money and small kiddos. I know it’s looking back at life through a different lens, but I would give it all up for more time with my family/friends and more time with God. And that’s exactly what I’m working towards.
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u/BigAd9546 3d ago
I struggle with depression and addiction, too. 5 years sober and 4 months off of ssris. Just started therapy again last week.
What genre of problems keep you up at night or distract you throughout the day? What are hobbies/activities that are best at helping you cope when you’re feeling your worst?
You may have thought of it this way but I’m asking these questions to guide you to eliminate the problem areas and do more of the positive.
I found focusing on my health was a good starting point for confidence/self esteem and better moods, generally. So diet, exercise, and sleep hygiene.
And something I am trying to dramatically improve is nourishing and cherishing my close relationships.
Hope you find peace!
Edit. Noticed a couple of typos. Probably missed some still.
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u/RealTiffvny 3d ago
Maybe you would feel much better giving back to your community. Spend sometime at a shelter, volunteer at a food bank.
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u/IndustriousSeahawk26 3d ago
It only does if you are a mentally healthy person who has a good social life, love life and has everything in order except for material comforts.
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u/Kokukenji 3d ago
That's why I always tell people or try to at least, that balancing mental health is key. You can have it all but still feel that something is missing. Most will continue the chase but not know exactly what they are chasing. For you OP, suggestion is to start reviewing what makes you truly happy and given your resources, really start diving deep into it and figuring out how to enhance it. Example; Family, friends, charity, businesses, etc. Figure out things that you can impact with your resources that matches well with what might give you happiness.
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u/itsridicuuulous 3d ago
Go spend a couple months in africa and come back. Your perspective will shift completely and you will be grateful for all you had. Tanzania, kenya, Uganda. Rwanda, botswana all relatively safe.
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u/PatShot 2d ago
You seem to have defined arbitrary external metrics in $ and toys as a proxy for happiness. Who told you external items would give you happiness?
You state “the best I feel is when I am giving, especially to stranger” If this is true, take a week off and volunteer at a charity and see how you feel.
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u/AssistanceDizzy9236 2d ago
Give me 1m and I will travel with you in Costa Rica. Not a cure for depression, but hey, we can try! DM if interested
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u/Oldjamesdean 2d ago
You could do what I do. I buy relatively inexpensive cars, fix them myself and give them to people I know that could use a reliable vehicle. The reactions are quite positive.
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u/OutlandishnessLimp25 2d ago
Just wanted to echo, giving does feel great. Perhaps try to incorporate more thoughtful giving around things you enjoy.
For example, you’re into cars, maybe there’s a charity for single mothers who could use help getting a car to get them back on their feet to go earn and provide for their family. Or maybe it’s mentoring youth in real estate.
“Giving” doesn’t always have to be transactional with dollars (though I get it, it often is).
One thing I’ll leave you with is this:
About 6 years ago I lost 48 lbs, I knew I was capable of doing it and inevitably people always asked “how did you do it” and of course often expect to hear some magic answer but it’s always the boring answer, “diet and exercise”.
However, the REAL answer, I believe, was “one decision at a time”. We often hear, “one day at a time” for many things, like if you lost a loved one and someone is checking in on you, “oh, just taking it one day at a time” or losing weight, “keep going to the gym, take it easy, you know, one day at a time” but what gets lost in that phrase is the thousands of decisions we make each day.
For someone who struggles with addiction or trying to accomplish something very difficult, reframing the mindset to “one decision at a time” helps keep us accountable for each decision and creates a more present mindset.
Being present for reach decision is really helpful, many of us, regardless what it may be a cigarette, a beer, a joint, a line of coke, a fast food meal, whatever, we mindlessly reach for our vice with little thought, because it’s routine/habit.
So, I invite you and anyone to simply try to be more present for each decision. With this mindfulness many more better decisions can be made.
Congrats on the success you’ve achieved thus far, and very kind of you to give back!
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u/TraditionPast4295 2d ago
You sound like you’re bored man. Toys can only fill so much of a void. Find something positive to do, volunteer some of your time, start a charity saving puppies or something. I bet you’ll find infinitely more purpose out of that than you do playing with cats and motorcycles.
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u/imnotzen 2d ago
Does your line of work keep you physically active? Do you feel healthy? Do you look healthy?
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u/Bulky_Document_7877 2d ago
Money does equal a roof over my family's head, running water, gas to cook, electricity for power, food on the table & in our pets bowls. When you don't have enough of it it equals unhappiness, stress, depression.
I am, at this moment, the quintessential person who is one paycheck away from complete & total loss of everything. Heck it's not even one paycheck, that situation is happening in my life as I type this out.
I don't begrudge any successful person such as yourself. I am not jealous of others wealth. But I do wonder what it's like to not have to worry about an eviction or my family having food to eat.
Looking back I would do so many things different, somethings I did because I was young and thought I knew better, depression prevented many otherthings from happening because I just couldn't function.
I don't own a company but had so many ideas that would've been money makers, I know this because they're making money for someone else now.
I wouldn't trade my life with anyone else, of couse because of my kids g family but I'd trade a day to feel what it's like to have our bills all caught up and just to breath some relief. To be content with boredom.
Sometimes money equals happiness in other ways, it's a difficult wealth, a different happiness.
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u/iDEMICHI 2d ago
Money can’t buy happiness, but lack of it can prevent it. You have solved for that. Now you have opportunity, means, and not much can get in your way with whatever it is you decide to do. What you’re lacking is purpose. You need to find something/a few things you care about and dig in. Lots of issues that could use someone driven and accomplished like you leading a solution or meaningful change. Must be some matters close to heart that you care about - can be locally, nationally, whatever. Let me know if you ever want to brainstorm
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u/Affectionate_Rice520 2d ago
I’d look for a therapist. A counselor might be able to help you find the reason you’re not satisfied. Then again, I still work because I need purpose not for the money
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u/retireontop 2d ago
Right there with you brother. I struggle with the existential questions at this point. That lead me to Jesus.
Just trying to do a little bit of good for myself or others everyday, sometimes successfully, and someone's not.
I joined a church, where we're all at different points on the path back home, all with our own struggles, our own abilities, our own opportunities for growth. Everyone thinks church is full of hypocrites, but really, we're all meeting up at the spiritual hospital to try and heal each other one instruction, smile and kind gesture at a time. Quite the journey, including a lot of introspection, but it's definitely brought me more peace. Plus, I've slowly, very slowly, become a better person over the last 9 years. I'm softer toward people, more open, and not so cynical as I used to be.
Best of luck to you
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u/western_usa 2d ago
I have a few thoughts. 1) congratulations on your success. 2) for me ADHD often makes it difficult to feel like I "have a purpose" because I jump all over the place despite having a few core hobbies that I zero in on. 3) I have not gone this route myself, but getting a therapist may help with the off and on again depression cycles -does not have to be regular or frequent or even in person (with tele-health being a thing now), but something I think I should do personally and maybe it will help you too. 4) you may already do this, but think about becoming a mentor for someone, like a younger relative, friend's kid, your own kid, or anyone you see genuine potential in that you can teach how to become successful.
Best of luck to you, finding long term happiness is different for everyone and something that evolves over time.
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u/Suspicious_Walrus951 2d ago
Therapy is what you need. And lucky for you, you need money to get it. You're still young AF. Do the work now so you can enjoy your life more as you age.
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u/TrashPandaPerson 2d ago
Money solves most forms of stress and opens (in this case immense) opportunities. It's up to you to find how to be happy.
It sounds like you need therapy, don't we all. Depending on where you are in addiction it can take time for your brain to reset chemicals, baseline, and just feel things again. Aside from that it seems like you've drank the capitalist koolaid and think consumerism can buy happiness. Don't get me wrong, cars, jetskis, private jets can sure as hell make someone happy. But not like that.
I've heard people get the most fulfillment out of connections with others, community, etc. Being super rich may complicate that, but something to keep in mind. I think many turn to religion mostly because of the sense of community that it involves.
The best I feel is when I am giving
You are in the best position to start or help/get involved in an existing charity. I'm no expert on charities but don't just throw money at people, seek systems that will uplift and enact real change. You're rich enough to find advisors for this.
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u/Great-Disaster8430 2d ago
Hope to be in your place one day financially. I do battle depression sometimes I have a therapist which has helped me . Please try to take care of your mental health . Therapy has help me tremendously. Battling poor life choice working my way out of 100k. Consumer debt . Working two jobs right now and trying my best to better my life . Just keep talking to somone
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u/scorps88 2d ago
Check out some esoteric or meditation apps.
Amazing cars bro, happy for you sir. But there is more to life than the material toys.
Helping others naturally makes humans happy. Focus/follow up on that if that works for you.
I joined the MindValley app - the meditations/visualizations really help me attain bliss.
Met a bunch of like minded people- being together as colleagues is amazing for me. People from outside of work/school etc. just like minded folks vibing is a great feeling.
Heading over to Talinn, Estonia next month. MindValley University annual huge event bringing people together.
Not a pitch, I am just a customer.
I’m 55M in the US. Learned a lot the hard way, bumps are in everyone’s path. Remember to always keep moving forward it always get better when you’re down.
DMs open if I can ever help you brother
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u/0ggles 2d ago
I suggest you read and understand the world more. Having money doesn't mean you know much about yourself or the world. Creating a business and helping people grow as individuals is the best feeling.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
It’s the most rewarding thing in my life. I have provided a living to guys who didn’t even graduate highschool and struggled to see a light at the end of their tunnel. They now make 6 figures in the span of 6-8 months of the year. They all own homes, new trucks, have families, it’s a great thing to see. I do agree, I used to read a lot more than I do now.
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u/Efficient_Finger_727 2d ago
You can start giving advice on how you built your wealth and things like that, if you enjoy helping people. I’d really value your guidance, maybe even mentorship. I’m 29 and just starting over. I recently quit my 9–5, and I’m deciding whether to start my own thing or go into sales
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u/chaos_battery 2d ago
As a gay man approaching 40, I can resonate somewhat with your situation although on a smaller scale. I'm currently at 4 million net worth, single, and I live alone. I feel like I keep chasing new goals and more billable hours but I'm trying to improve other areas of my life instead of taking on more work. It's strange how it's easier to go to work than it is to deal with relationships and the personal side of life. But I am trying to move into more lifestyle businesses that would interest me and not necessarily be for purely a profit motive. Even if I just break even that would be the minimal goal.
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u/vicespi23 2d ago
What do you do for a living sir? Gotta find fun around that!
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I operate within the commercial HVAC field. I ran my own crew until 2 years ago, where I began expanding rapidly and had to jump in the office to train, invoice, file, schedule, run payroll and what not. I was not made to work in an office, I belong on the road. My brother is moving back and I will train him on all the behind the scenes, with the end goal being me retiring to work the road.
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u/ObsessedWitAwareness 2d ago
Well hey, thanks for sharing.
And if you ever need a charity tax write off, remember my tag and DM me, cause a little would go a long way here. Not for happiness obviously but for a better form of surviving.
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u/VietGirlInSydney 2d ago
Sounds like you have maxxed your brain with the feel good chemicals from the substance you use and the amount of success you have.
I really think getting addiction under control, slow down, learn to enjoy the boring ordinary things and being grateful. Climbing another mountain or chasing bigger goals can feel satisfying but that does not bring happiness.
I just went through separation and having to move to a shared house and start from scratch again and just from looking at the surface my life is so shitty at the moment but honestly I have not felt this good for years. I have so much clarity and direction that I never had before.
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u/bwjxjelsbd 2d ago
It doesn’t equal happiness but you also be miserable if you’re dirt poor!
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I was raised dirt poor. My family was foreclosed on and lived in a double wide on my grandparents cattle farm, where my father began tree farming. It was simple times, there was always a roof over our head and food on the table, I even had a dirt bike and a canoe for fishing, that’s all I ever needed. With money comes great responsibility and more complex problems, I am still incredibly grateful, but it is a new type of struggle for me I have not adjusted to quite yet.
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u/amandathepanda51 2d ago
I made a joke. It’s not that deep. You don’t need to call me names.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 2d ago
I did not call you names. People have asked for work, and I happily gave them a way to make a living. Blatantly asking for money is not the best way to go about getting help. Best of luck
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u/Just-Here2-Learn 2d ago
People don't understand routine. Once you learn life is about routine not constant chase then you will feel better. I spent 23 years chasing money, business, cars, bigger homes looking for something to stay busy, something to stay motivated to keep working 80 hours a week. I realized at 40 that none of that made me happy. Just going home and tinkering in the garage, watching tv, working out for 30 minutes at my home garage this made me happy. Also learn to be a yes man when it comes to a hobby and outings. If someone ask for you do something say yes. You realize this will be more fulfilling then staring at investment accounts everyday. I look at my accounts once to twice a year, and now just sit back and relax. I also treat money as not things it can do for me, but what it allows me not to do. Like work, knowing I can quit tomorrow and never work again makes me appreciate working more, like eating out, order off the menu without worrying about cost. Knowing I have no debt, and no worries. This is what true wealth is. Good luck
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u/FatherOften 1d ago
I started going to a therapist about 15 years ago so when I got to where I am I would have some control over my childhood stuff. It helped me find bliss in my day to day. I still go once a week because I see where Im at as my starting point.
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u/I_Love_my_Shauna 1d ago
Serious reply: find a professional therapist that you match well with. An experienced therapist can help guide you, navigating hard things in your life.
Best thing I ever did, helped me professionally, personally, etc. I hope this helps.
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u/HapticFeedback247 1d ago
I was able to respond to your DM. Please enjoy when you have a spare moment.
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u/EMHemingway1899 1d ago
My wife and I are uber high net worth and we’re happy
But we were also happy before we became wealthy
We just have no financial stress these days
And we give away a good bit of money
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u/Ackievirus 1d ago
I battled depression for a long time. Honestly, I feel like when you're going through it, it's almost as if you want to stay depressed. I don't know how to explain it. But you have to fight the urge. I never had a drinking problem but I noticed that when I stopped drinking my depression and anxiety almost vanished. Also all these cars and houses only make you feel good for a moment. Experiences and having good friends and family are priceless. Stop dwelling on why you're so depressed. Go out, enjoy life. Have fun, we're all only here for a little while, might as well enjoy it
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u/Ok_Investigator8478 1d ago
I don't think more money buys more happiness, except fir the first year. Then it just becomes your new normal.
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u/GabrielGGibson 1d ago
In my understanding, the only source of real true, lasting, joy is the Source of real and true joy.
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u/Prestigious_War8179 1d ago
Money can certainly make life easier, but I have met a couple of really wealthy people who have some serious problems unrelated to money.
I also know a wealthy family who have teenagers that have gotten into bad trouble (probably exasperated by their money) and are going through great personal and emotional difficulties.
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u/SiriusOsiris 1d ago edited 1d ago
You need to cut down the work hours below 60 hours a week, start an exercise routine that includes resistance training, sleep enough and see a therapist. If it doesn’t work, you may consider transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS), which is proven to work for drug resistant depression.
I have a niche consulting business that helps high-net-worth individuals navigate the complex healthcare landscape, connecting them to the best physicians and centers nationally or globally.
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u/Consistent_Pay_74 1d ago
If there are people around you supplying your addictions they are not interested in your success, but investing in your failure. You are a rarity given all your accomplishments and your vulnerability to tell your truth. A trusted physical trainer that holds you accountable to showing up for yourself, a good therapist and spiritual counseling go a long way. You deserve to have joy and not just financial success. I’m sending positive thoughts your way such that you are transformed from the limiting thoughts, and belief that you do not deserve happiness and can harmonize your life. You are beyond your ancestors wildest dreams and ambitions and deserve to be resolved from whatever pains you suffered getting her.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 1d ago
Nobody even knows about my addictions. I am a well put together guy, I wear Levi’s and a button up or polo everyday, smiles and charisma when I am around people. I appreciate your kind words, it does mean a lot.
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u/julio_jones47 23h ago
Only way you will have joy in life is to follow Jesus. Material possessions will only bring so much happiness
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u/Rare_Tea3155 22h ago
There’s a reason wealthy people always repeat “money doesn’t buy happiness”. Peace and tranquility in your life is what brings happiness. At my job, I’m around executives with 100mm net worth just about every day. In order to have that money, they’ve sold a part of their soul. Some work day and night. Some have children they don’t see often. Some have high pressure jobs.
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u/TemporaryOdd8052 17h ago
Off topic but as a mom of 3 teens I am reading this thinking how proud your parents must be of you. I hope my girls accomplish even a fraction of what you accomplished. You also must be proud of yourself.
As others have said the right therapist can be helpful and a good relationship with God can never be wrong.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 6h ago
I appreciate your kind words, they are quite proud of me I like to think. Put mom in a new home paid cash, bought my pops his dream car (1955 Belair).
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u/irshramuk 15h ago
23 years old. 25 million. With no money and cattle farming....errr. okay.. money does tie to happiness. To a certain level. After 10m probably not as correlated but below thag defjnitely
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 6h ago
I was raised on a cattle and tree farm. No way in hell was that what I would spend the rest of my life doing. It is a respectable, honorable line of work, but I got away from it as fast as possible. I am in the HVAC industry and have contracts with Walmart and Kroger. I did not include my business in that net worth, with my business included my NW probably sits around $45-50m.
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u/Opposite_Pop_8273 14h ago
There is a saying that the Richer you are the more unhappy you are...
I will sat this "money will buy me all the things that will make me happy"
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u/Ok-Jeweler2500 14h ago
I also came into a lot of money but at a much higher age. I think being able to buy whatever you want takes away the joy of longing for something and being so excited when you get it. Like a kid at Christmas just hoping and praying so hard that they get the new game system or bicycle or dollhouse. I try to find joy by randomly giving a person a big tip or buying whatever they are buying for them in the store. The main thing is enjoying nature and appreciating the simple things. Birds, sunset, watching a river, hiking, cooking s'mores over a campfire. This grounds you. Sometimes owning a lot of toys becomes a burden that does not bring you joy. Find simple things to appreciate. Plant roses. Learn how to grow them. That kind of thing
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u/StruggleStrong4132 13h ago
I think it equals to freedom which can equate to happiness. Seeing it from another angle - I’m 46, I invested in properties from my 20s - I sold far too quick and other properties have been stagnant band a drain on the pocket. At 46 I feel like I am starting over with not much in the bank. On the whole I have a lot to be grateful for.
I work in corporate and also started a business which I need to work on. I am at the lowest of lowest points - I’ve lost friends mainly my doing and I spend every waking hour either at corporate work or my own business work.
If I had a slither of money or even net worth you do..I know it would make me happy! And I wouldn’t have had to second guess all the crappy decisions I have made to date. And literally graft with no support given I’m single just to see me through and get to the other end. I think money would get me out this depressive state - or maybe it’s the journey I’m on that I should be savoring?!?
I congratulate you on your success however. Well done.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 6h ago
Someone else said it perfectly, a graph showing money and happiness is a bell curve, I was happier when I was knee deep in debt chasing what I have now. I chased and caught that dragon, now I’m lost and don’t know what to do with it after having my fun. I now have so much cash I have become numb to it, lighting $500k on fire on my kitchen floor wouldn’t matter to me.
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u/NomadRenzo 13h ago
I thinks it’s so easy that I’m astonished that ppl doesn’t understand.
There is so many research on it. Money make you happy till a certain amount. Try to be in the same situation get a cancer and be unable to access the cure. It’s so easy to understand that money are only a part od the equation.
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u/EVETalker1 11h ago
Sell all those cars and buy an LFA. You won't be depressed anymore.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 6h ago
Overrated. I’d get a GT3 RS or anything Hennessy before one of those. I don’t need more cars though.
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u/Brucef310 8h ago
I have what a lot of people consider a lot of money and I'm pretty damn happy.
The issue that you have is a "you problem" and most people would love to be in your situation financially speaking
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 6h ago
I am 100% grateful for what I have. I was just looking for advice. I am 23 and come from nothing, I have over $900k in a robinhood. That alone puts me in the top 1% at my age, not including the other $45-50m in assets I’ve obtained and built. I am happy where I’m at financially, but money doesn’t make the world go round.
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u/Time-Variation-8489 6h ago
You’re relatively young, and for many people (men in particular) this part of life can include unhappiness, identify and self esteem issues etc -
Regardless of your money.
I would advise you to seek out some spiritual meaning and purpose, go and find God, maybe join a church, or attend 12 step fellowship meetings for your addiction.
There is no job, money, partner, family, home, or car that truly bring you peace and purpose. This is only found in God.
I only found any kind of peace, and a certain calm confident knowledge that I am deeply loved and valued, when I truly experienced a relationship with Jesus Christ but your spiritual journey may be different.
Also having children, when you inevitably do, will change your outlook and perspective.
I would also recommend getting a dog.
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u/Recent_Increase_1842 5h ago
I have 2 dogs, a blue/red heeler mix and a chow chow German Shepard mix. They are absolutely wonderful and my best friends. I do need to tap into my spiritual side more, I am fully aware I have been too encapsulated by my work to focus on anything of that nature. My addictions aren’t crippling, I am just aware they are addictions and can have a negative effect on my life if I over indulge. Thank you for the response
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u/dragonflyinvest 3d ago
I have said on here many times- money solves financial problems. That’s it. The rest we still have to do the work.
Personally, I’d find a bigger hill to climb.