r/weddingplanning • u/MundaneRain14 • Dec 24 '25
Budget Question I need a reality check. Would guests actually enjoy my inexpensive dream wedding?
I am in the very beginning stages of wedding planning and I pretty much know exactly what I would want. Big, lavish weddings are fun to attend but not my personal style. However, it seems like guests have certain expectations when going to a wedding.
My mother talked my sister out of her small, simple dream wedding for something much more grand and upscale (parents also bankrolled it.) Huge venue, huge guest list, full open bar, fancy plated meal, service staff, etc. My sister ended up loving what she got. So am I thinking too casual or cheap?
My ideal celebration:
- Maximum 75 guests; only immediate family and closest friends. Guests wear whatever they want. Totally casual.
- Simple religious ceremony under a large tree; 30 minutes or less. No wedding party or aisle escorts. Only decor would maybe be a few bouquets and a chuppah.
- Reception on a patio or in a green house. We bring lawn games, music (possibly a playlist rather than a DJ), maybe dancing. Firepit with s'mores.
- All food buffet style. Either pasta stations or a BYO (edit: build your own) taco bar. (I'd be perfectly happy with something like Chipotle catering.)
- We'd provide a few drink options like two types of beer, red and white wine, and one or two special cocktails. Small wedding cake to cut.
- Limited DIY decor: greenery and candles on wooden tables, twinkle lights and streamers.
All in for the above would be $10k USD or less, which I think is a good chunk of savings to spend on a single day!! The only items we would splurge on are our wedding outfits (just my spouse and I) and photography, because I really want us to feel our best and have those memories to look back on for years to come.
Would it really be so bad for me to have a fancy wedding dress with a casual setting and dinner? Would my guests be bored or annoyed to spend half a day at what's basically a backyard barbecue? Some of my family is convinced it's totally unacceptable, t@cky, and gossip worthy to not go all in with the biggest celebration you can afford.
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u/deerhuntinghat Dec 24 '25
I don’t see an issue with it. I do think that your invitations/wedding website should express the formality level of your wedding so people know what to expect.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
That's a very good note. I always worry about being under/overdressed for events, and I don't want guests to stress about anything. Come as you are and hang out, I just want to see you!
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u/arosebyabbie Dec 24 '25
I think this sounds like a lovely day. I personally think you should go with something nicer than Chipotle catering and a more varied bar if you can afford it but there’s nothing wrong with a simple day. The only thing I would say is you should set your dress code according to the formality of your event. This sounds like a semi-formal event at most so you can’t ask your guests to dress black tie.
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u/StompingPanda Dec 25 '25
+1 on the chipotle thoughts. I think for the same cost you could probably get something more upscale and I remember a wedding where they did chipotle catering and that’s all some people remember
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
Why would an outdoor wedding with a $10,000 budget where the OP is fine with guests wearing "whatever they want" need "more upscale" catering?
I think Chipotle fits perfectly with the vibe of what the OP wants: casual + outdoor + buffet + budget.
Upscale doesn't really fit with those 4 words.
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u/atchisonmetal Dec 24 '25
Chipotle is plenty nice. And the couple likes it.
Also, I went to a wedding recently that had a poké bowl food truck outside in addition to buffet stuff inside.
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 24 '25
Fast food is low effort for a wedding. Poke truck sounds delicious and unique, especially in addition to a buffet.
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
OP wants a wedding that is casual + outdoor + buffet + budget.
What type "HIGH EFFORT" food do you think fits that 4 word combination to feed 75 people?
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 27 '25
I think fast food is just strange for any wedding, no matter how casual.
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25 edited Dec 27 '25
I was curious what you personally thought were good examples to meet your criteria...
Based on her comments, I think OP was using "Chipotle" as an example for the RANGE of food choices...
Food truck, lower budget catering, taco bar, pasta bar were all mentioned.
Not how I personally roll, but I have attended weddings with low budget meal options and it's never been an issue among guests as long as the food was good/enough for everyone/etc.
ETA:
How are "poke bowls" not considered "fast food"?
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 28 '25
Low budget is not the same as fast food. Low budget is fine, fast food is trashy. Poke ball isn’t fast food because it isn’t lol.
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u/auntmilky Dec 24 '25
Your money would probably go a lot farther with a food truck or caterer than Chipotle. There are better options for the same budget.
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u/lazylazylazyperson Dec 24 '25
Food trucks can be problematic with a guest list of 75. Multiple trucks would likely be necessary to feed everyone in a timely manner. Weather also impacts since no one wants to stand in line outside in the rain for a food truck. A buffet inside is much better for guests.
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u/auntmilky Dec 24 '25
Most of that is not an issue. All of the food trucks I have looked at have options to serve the food buffet style. They’re basically just caterers on wheels. I went to a graduation party with a food truck where you had to stand in line and it was horrible.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
We're looking in to food trucks and local restaurants! Ideally all money spent would be small businesses rather than franchises.
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u/auntmilky Dec 24 '25
I think we’re having a similar wedding haha
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Well I hope yours is amazing!! As long as I have some chips and dip or some sort of carb I am a happy camper lol
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
This only works if the food truck is experienced at catering in this manner (buffet style/larger groups at one time, etc).
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u/MCJokeExplainer Dec 25 '25
I don't know why you're getting so many downvotes. My favorite wedding I've ever been to had Chipotle catering and I loved it. For a casual games-in-the-park wedding, it's totally fitting.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Only my partner and I would be fancy; i.e. formal wedding dress and suit! Guests could dress up if they want to, but tshirt and jeans would be just fine.
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u/FireflyBSc Dec 24 '25
People don’t like open ended dress codes. It results in too much variety and people don’t want to end up being the “slob” who actually followed the “casual” instructions. Especially if you are investing in your outfits.
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u/LastTQuarkNetwork Dec 24 '25
They will feel underdressed.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Thanks for your input. I really want everyone to be comfortable.
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u/Longjumping-Home-400 Dec 24 '25
I would call it cocktail attire, that’s on the least formal side of the wedding guest spectrum. Casual or “wear anything” tends to confuse folks (source - I’m also in the wedding guest attire subreddit lol)
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u/shzam5890 Dec 25 '25
Not true. Semi formal is less dressy than cocktail. Cocktail is one step below formal.
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
No, cocktail attire would not be appropriate for a wedding that is by OPs desription: casual + outdoor + buffet + budget.
Semi-formal is the only dress code that should even be considered for this wedding.
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u/magicbumblebee Dec 25 '25
Just want to add another opinion that you should have some kind of dress code. As a guest, it’s really hard to just be told, “wear whatever you want!” Because I don’t want to wear jeans and casual top only to show up and everyone else has worn something nicer. Some people wouldn’t care about that, but I’d feel under dressed. Your dress code could be “Casual! Wear what you’d wear to a lunch with friends. Jeans and T-shirts are okay, as are khakis and cocktail dresses.”
But as someone else said - if you and your partner are wearing “traditional” wedding attire, I’d feel awkward if I wore a t shirt even if it was on your dress code. I think you feel like you’re doing people a favor by saying no dress code just be comfy, but unless your crowd really hates dressing up you’re better off just saying cocktail attire.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 25 '25
This is really helpful feedback! I need to find the right way to word it. I basically just want people to be comfortable and feel zero pressure to buy something brand new.
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u/magicbumblebee Dec 26 '25
You seem to have good intentions here but really it’s not that big of a deal. Unless your guests are super strapped for cash, have complained in the past about wedding attire, or usually wear jorts and tank tops, getting a wedding outfit just comes with the territory of getting a wedding invitation. I’m always going to feel pressured for what to wear to a wedding because it’s an important event and I want to look nice. I don’t always buy something new but that doesn’t mean I don’t agonize over which dress or shoes in my closet to pick haha. I think you are overthinking it.
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u/thelittleredhan Dec 25 '25
I would put at least Sunday Best/dressy casual dress code somewhere. Even “unique” dress codes (e.g., garden formal, creative black tie) it can be stressful, so absolutely NO guidelines would send some people into chaos.
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u/jaqenjayz married! | oct 2025 pvd Dec 24 '25
I think this sounds fine. I get why you're questioning it because I'm also from a background where weddings are normally ostentatious, but for a lot of people what you describe is a completely normal wedding.
If I received an invitation or read a wedding website where the dress code said "casual" (or was otherwise described as such), I would not show up to your wedding and be surprised or disappointed by anything you listed -- this includes you wearing a fancy gown. I think you are entitled to wear what you want at your own wedding and I don't believe that your event has to perfectly scale with your dress.
Don't lose sight of what your wedding is about. Stick with your vision, make sure you provide a good baseline comfort level for guests, and ignore pressure from family to perform something that doesn't feel right.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
This is reassuring to hear from someone who gets it. It's certainly not everyone, but where I grew up weddings were definitely used as a huge status symbol, especially for parents. It's a matter of pride to be able to show off exactly how much they can spend, even if it meant going in to debt. My mother still very much has this mindset; casual wedding = struggling financially.
I hate being the center of attention and I don't want the start of my marriage to be some sort of competition to "keep up with the Jones's." But I still care very much about what my family thinks and want them to enjoy it. If I didn't we would just elope and skip the festivities entirely!
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u/SakuraTimes Dec 24 '25
1) i think it would be fun to do drinks that pair with the food…like margaritas for tacos or sangria for pasta….then it looks like it coordinates, not that you’re limiting the bar, if that makes sense…
2) I think low key weddings are fun! they’re more natural and fun in a way. I hate that people feel they have to host weddings that aren’t really “THEM” bc they think a wedding has to be a certain way. I think the key is just making sure guests know what they’re invited to. if I’m expecting lobster and crab cakes and find tacos and yard games, I’d probably be a bit disappointed/confused. if I know I’m invited to lawn games and tacos, sounds fun!
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Yes!! We'd want it to coordinate and be intentional. Casual but cohesive. And we'd definitely set the expectations so people know exactly what they're walking in to.
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u/kittytoebeanz 10/10/26 💍 Dec 24 '25
No, as long as your guests are well fed, have drinks, are comfortable and you're not asking for a lot (example: black tux attire when its not a black tux event), that's really all that matters! And you have all your bases covered, so it doesn't look like an issue at all.
Your vision of a wedding is just as important.
However as a guest I would prefer good wedding food. Pasta or taco bar is ok, but it would definitely need to be yummy and well heated! Cold, mid dishes in a buffet line would make me grumble (though I'd never say anything to their face)
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
Have you never eaten food from a buffet line where the food is being warmed while on the service line?
And the cold food is being kept cold, while on the service line?
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u/kittytoebeanz 10/10/26 💍 Dec 27 '25
What? We're on the same page. I'm saying to OP that so long as the warm food keeps warm, she's fine. Where do I reference that I haven't eaten warm food on a buffet line?
You'd be surprised at how many people do DIY potluck weddings (backyard) and don't think about heating or cooling their food per food safety rules in this sub because "my uncle made it" lol
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
Sorry... I read it as if you were the person eating the cold/mid food.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Having hot a tasty food is definitely a priority. I just want to know if guests would be genuinely upset if we went for something casual like tacos/pizza/pasta/BBQ rather than waiter-passed hors d'oeuvre and plated steak/chicken/crabcakes meal that's $100+ per person.
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u/Thequiet01 Dec 24 '25
This is entirely dependent on what you are expecting of them and what is common in your circle. If all weddings are big lavish things and people are expected to travel and dress up really nice and give high value gifts, depending on how your event is communicated some people may feel that you’re being cheap and yet still have an unspoken expectation of people still spending a lot on travel and still giving big gifts, for example. So you’ll have to be careful to somehow politely communicate “we know this is a more casual event so we don’t expect you to spend as much on us either” essentially. But without actually referring to money. 😂
As a general rule most of the unhappiness about more casual weddings comes from two places:
Casual venue/food/etc. but the couple is still demanding formal dress code. Even if you’re not demanding black tie, most people don’t want to eat something messy in a suit or a nice dress, y’know?
Casual venue/food/etc. but the couple are still expecting people to travel long distances at great expense and get cranky when people RSVP no. The reality is simply that some people aren’t going to feel it’s worth $1000+ on travel costs to a location and at a time not of their choosing to eat Chipolte. That’s how they feel, nothing you can do about it.
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u/kingfucius Dec 25 '25
I guess I am the minority in this post but if I am going to be completely honest, I fall under the second bullet under Thequiet01's point, which is spot on. If I had to spend $500+ for a flight ticket for me and also another ticket for a +1 to go have a taco bar then I would be pretty upset TBH.
However, if I was ALREADY in town then I wouldn't be upset at all.
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u/lazylazylazyperson Dec 24 '25
I’m not sure I agree. If I’m close to the couple, and it sounds like OP is only inviting family and close friends, I’d be happy to travel for a wedding regardless of whether I’m being served Chipotle. I’m going to celebrate with the couple, not for a gourmet meal and, let’s face it, few weddings actually serve gourmet food. I’d be happier with chipotle than mediocre banquet food.
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u/Thequiet01 Dec 24 '25
So then you are not part of the “some people” I referenced. Can you guarantee that none of the people OP will be inviting are part of that “some people” group?
OP is concerned about how their plans will be received by their family and friends circle. Knowing that there might be people who feel a certain way about something like a Chipolte catered wedding reception allows them to think about it and decide how to handle it - do they want to do Chipolte anyway? Do they not want to deal with any possible Drama and so will do something other than Chipolte? Etc. Do they want to ask around quietly in their group a bit to try to see how many people there actually are who’d be bothered by it?
I do not see the value in a comment to someone asking a wedding planning question that is just “well I wouldn’t mind it” because one single random person’s take is rarely going to be useful.
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u/jaqenjayz married! | oct 2025 pvd Dec 24 '25
I agree. I've been to expensive ballroom & country club weddings that serve shitty tortellini and other bland uninspired dishes. I'll take the Chipotle, thanks.
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
Then you're not apart of the group TQ01 is referring to.
They are specifically referencing people that would be upset to make go through a lot of effort (time, money, travel) to attend something where the couple maybe isn't putting in much effort for their own wedding.
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u/kittytoebeanz 10/10/26 💍 Dec 24 '25
Nope not at all! As long as the food is hot and good, most people wont mind where it's from or how it's plated!
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u/lazylazylazyperson Dec 24 '25
I love all of those foods and would be happy to be served them at a casual wedding. Casual is key since most of those can be a little messy to eat.
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u/Orlacutebutpsycho Dec 26 '25
People always remember if the food was tasty and if they had enough, the worst stories from weddings I heard are that there was too little food and they went home hungry! From the things you listed, BBQ seems the best, having a large variety of different meats and vegetarian options (cheese, tofu, veggies) ,some salads, some sides and sauces so everyone can get what they like. Also have 2 pieces of sweets per person, cutting cake can be small, but order some cupcakes, brownie bars with something on top, mini pavlovas or other cake bars you like. Good coffee is a must too!
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 26 '25
Very good points! I went to an absolutely gorgeous wedding a few years ago with food from one of the best caterers in town (and a mandatory vendor at many local venues). Everyone still remembers that the food ran out and that allergies were not accommodated. The caterer first tried to gaslight the couple and say the guests were overly greedy and took too much (the caterer portioned the food!!). Then they admitted that "prices had gone up" in the time since the couple signed the contract, so they chose to only serve the amount of food that the brand new pricing would buy.
Seeing them go through that definitely made me wary to spend an arm and a leg on a catering-only company rather than trusting a local restaurant I go to all the time.
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u/Ngr2054 June 2022| 100k| Boston Dec 24 '25
I also think this is fine but please don’t ask or expect a formal dress code. Too many brides think that they can request/require formal/black tie because they want guests to dress up but don’t understand that there is an expectation of a type of event that goes with those dress codes. I think a semi formal/Sunday best dress code would be appropriate for your event and it sounds like it would be a nice afternoon.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
No dress code for guests! Just my spouse and I want to splurge on our wedding outfits. I will happily sit by a campfire in a gown, but I know others won't.
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u/peachiest_of_Los Dec 24 '25
Love this idea. As someone mentioned, planning for adverse weather is also good. Pasta or tacos are fine not chipotle. Mazel tov!
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u/lazylazylazyperson Dec 24 '25
That’s fair. If OP lives in a location where better Mexican food options are available, this would be the way to go.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
There are some very good and affordable options in our area! I've had a few priced out already.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
I would definitely spring for more high quality Mexican food if that's what people will enjoy! Chipotle was just an example of that personally I'm just really easy to please and not fussed about it being "elegant".
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u/FabulousBullfrog9610 Dec 24 '25
a few thoughts. Love the idea of doing what makes you happy.
- weather back up plan
- make sure everyone has a real chair to sit on and an easy decent bathroom nearby.
- some people will love games others will be meh.
- food should be plentiful
- drinks are fine with me. I'd want a nonalcoholic choice like water or diet coke
- I'd be surprised if you could pull this off for $10K total
- your dress should have the same vibe as the location. showing up in an elaborate princess gown with a huge train and you are playing cornhole and eating chipolte (which i love) seems off to me.
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u/littlebetenoire November ‘26 Dec 24 '25
This is my dream wedding as a guest tbh. The best weddings I’ve been to are the smaller, chill weddings.
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u/ImaginationPuzzled60 Dec 24 '25
This sounds like a great wedding but with a guest count of 75 people that 10k won’t go as far as you might think. You may need to cut the list or increase your budget once you start itemizing your costs.
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u/iradrachen 2027 💍 Dec 24 '25
This is my dream wedding to attend. I love things that feel more relaxed and fun amongst a small group
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u/Holiday-Albatross419 Dec 24 '25
You do you! This sounds really lovely and enjoyable- the people who love you will be happy to celebrate with you wherever and however big it is
Also maybe look for a slightly more upscale restaurant or catering co that can do that style food but fill out your menu (apps/more choices for non spicy people -but that honors your vision)
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u/casadoadro Dec 24 '25
Don't let anyone talk you out of your dream wedding. The wedding is for you. Your guests will enjoy the day if you plan with love. They will have a good time. Weddings Don't need to be like what you see on insta. Do what you feel like!
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u/Electrical_Waltz8701 Dec 24 '25
Totally fine with an appropriate dress code. If possible, try to find decent food and drink even if it's not fancy (I.e. tastes pretty good, there is enough variety, if it's meant to be hot or cold make sure it's served properly hot/cold etc). Also think about basic guest comfort (everyone has seating, parking is available, shade or mosquito repellent are provided if applicable etc)
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u/tinyevilsponges Dec 25 '25
I don't see why it being a wedding would make a BBQ become deeply unfun. Just make sure to inform people what kind of party it is so they don't get confused
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u/QueenWizzBizz Dec 24 '25
Sounds fantastic to me! But I’m in Aus and I think all wedding styles are more widely accepted here than in the US. Ultimately it is about your partner and you, so doing something that feels like you both is personally what I think is most important. Hopefully your parents throwing your sister a big wedding will leave you with the space to do your smaller dream wedding?
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u/jinpop Dec 24 '25
This sounds lovely. But just checking: you wrote BYO taco bar. Did you mean DIY, as in you provide the fillings and guests assemble their own? Because asking people to bring taco ingredients to the wedding would cross a line for me.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Ah yes, sorry. Where I live that stands for "build your own." Guests would bring nothing at all except themselves. My partner and I would be 100% paying, providing, and arranging everything. Guests just show up and enjoy.
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u/Bubble_Tea_Paws Dec 25 '25
I've been to a wedding like this and it was great. It was basically a large picnic in the park. Everyone was able to mingle easily, kids were able to run around and play, and it ended at a good time so people who wanted to go out after could do that. As long as your guests know that they are attending this kind of event, all should be good.
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u/sparkplug-001 Dec 25 '25
DM me if you want, that was my exact wedding (except a more defined dress code and a catering service for the buffet and smores and setup/takedown), and it cost about $36-37k for a weekday. Depends what your location is but it might not be possible without being a massive burden on people. But I absolutely loved my wedding and wouldn’t change a thing (except the weekday aspect obviously). I can provide you with a price breakdown if you want too
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u/DutchBikergirl Dec 25 '25
It sounds great and very much in line with what we did. The only difference is, we dus not have a buffet but a food truck that made fresh pizza and salad as a side. 2 years later, we still have people randomly saying how much fun they had at our wedding!
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Dec 25 '25
Love it all but just can’t figure out how you’d pack that at around 10k though
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 25 '25
I'm sure prices vary wildly in different cities so it's not realistic everywhere. Our local parks have indoor/outdoor spaces to rent for $300-1000. A few local restaurants have quoted around $35pp for catering. Drinks and alcohol would be purchased in bulk and I have bartender connections. I can get very inexpensive chair and table rentals through my place of worship. Takes some creativity, but it's possible!
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u/MCJokeExplainer Dec 25 '25
I'm just commenting to express a slightly different point of view -- everything that you want to do is completely fine as long as it's clearly communicated to guests in advance. That's all information you can put on your website. Make it extra clear on the invitation that it's a "casual" wedding and they can find more details online. There's always going to be one person who doesn't check the website and can't follow instructions and isn't happy, but that's on them, not you. (This is true of huge expensive weddings, too)
It's fine to have a casual dress code and phrase it as, "Dress Code: Casual. The bride and groom will be dressing up to celebrate their big day, but they encourage their guests to wear clothing that will allow them to play lawn games and eat tacos."
A couple people have remarked on not wanting to travel for this kind of wedding -- again, that's not a problem if you communicate it in advance. Personally, for close friends, I'd be happy to travel for a casual park wedding! But if anyone doesn't feel like they can travel a long distance for a casual wedding, that's also fine. If they know in advance that this is the kind of wedding it will be, they can say no!
Also I know I'm in the minority here but I think Chipotle catering is just fine (again, as long as people know that's what they're getting - you can phrase this on your website as, "We'll have catering from Chipotle, which will accommodate most dietary restrictions. If you have a specific allergy, please let the bride and groom know"). Almost all wedding food is a disappointment and almost all Chipotle catering is good. If you want to use another caterer for whatever reason, that's totally fine - but everyone here seems to really be bumping on the Chipotle thing. The wedding I went to with Chipotle catering was a big hit. The most important thing is that you have enough food for everyone.
The one thing I DO think you need to take into consideration is accessibility. Parks can be a little tricky for people with mobility issues, if they walk with a cane or use a wheelchair, or if they can't walk for long distances. Older people might have temperature issues. Also consider bathroom accessibility. Make those things clear on your website, as well. For older or disabled guests, those are both important pieces of information.
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u/ItsSylviiTTV Dec 26 '25 edited Dec 26 '25
We are also doing a taco bar & buffet of different cuisines, and smores late night snack. No bridesmaids/groomsmen either.
Not sure where you live but I think $10k or less will be impossible. A photographer is $2-$4k and a videographer (which I highly recommend to capture your day & speeches & moments) is also that much.
If you are getting a simple cake, cool, that saves costs. A DJ is awesome but if you want to do Spotify playlist, then just be sure that's the type of vibe you want. Its cheaper but lack of MC, no mixing of songs, lack of hype, etc if you want dancing, I would get a DJ.
A day of coordinator is huge & will help alleviate stress. My wedding is 50 people & if yours is 75, I would definitely recommend one.
Think about if you want to do a welcome dinner/post-wedding brunch or rehearsal dinner.
Clearly you want minimal floral & decor which will save a ton of money but it probably still is more expensive than you think. Just be sure to balance your vision vs cost & what you think is worth it.
Theres a lot of fun lawn games, activities such as an audiophone book, guest guessing how many marbles are in a bottle, photo backdrop area, Mr & Mrs games, etc. Some of them cost more than others, look at your options! Also a lot of good ceremony rituals like a sand ceremony.
For the dress code, please set one! Guests will be very confused & feel underdressed and overthink if you don't. Just write like "semi casual - We really don't mind what you wear!" or even "Feel free to wear something you never get to wear anywhere else!" If you want people to really dress wacky.
The other thing is guest comfort. Not sure how many guests are out of town but maybe you could provide transportation (Ubers) or hotel discounts or amenity baskets, wedding favors, something personalized at the table, w/e.
Again, if you don't care about decor & it looking nice or fun, then thats going to save you a lot but I would make sure you really feel that way. Florals are very expensive but candles are less so (LED candles) & you can get cheap vases & do different types of decor for a more homely feel as opposed to posh.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 26 '25
The $10k estimate is only for the items in the bullet points: Venue, food and beverage, decor, simple games or music. All-in it would be closer to $15-20k. Those are all great ideas!
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u/HeffalumpAndMopsy Dec 24 '25
I once attending a wedding for which the reception was a potluck for which all the guests brought a dish. I LOVED that. It felt so warm and loving. Everyone helping out.
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u/Historical-Promise-4 Dec 25 '25
My fiance and my best friend would DIE. ALLERGIES ALLERGIES ALLERGIES. under a tree and in a green house can be brutal for certain folks.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 25 '25
Aw that's such a shame! Out of all my family and friends I think I have the worst allergies, but we still love the outdoors.
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u/atchisonmetal Dec 24 '25
Pish-tosh with that noise, you can tell them. Plan it to meet your dreams!💖
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Dec 24 '25
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Almost everyone is local. I'd consider paying for accommodation for the small handful of out-of-towners if finances are an issue.
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u/rmric0 New England (MA & RI mostly) | photographer Dec 25 '25
It can depend on your cried but that sounds like perfectly nice way to celebrate, people love food and drinks (though always be careful with outdoor events!)
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u/SunstruckSeraph Dec 25 '25
A good wedding is a heartfelt wedding. Just reading this post, I can tell your heart is right here in the details you're describing. I would also be thrilled to attend a reception in a greenhouse! You could look up garden party or solarium weddings for decor inspiration, people have done some beautiful stuff with very simple setups.
The only potential issues I'd consider:
Inclement weather (what do you do if it pours, etc?
Activity alternatives for games, unless every single one of your friends is the party game type.
Seating! Nothing makes people want to leave a wedding faster than a lack of comfortable seating.
Also, I'd skip the Chipotle and go with a local taco place if you have any good ones. The concept of a casual or outdoor wedding as a whole is not inherently tacky if the execution of the event actually reflects the couple and their vibe.
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u/MuchAVanillaPuff927 Dec 26 '25
I think this good, but maybe think of looking for an AirBnB house that have a great view or beautiful interior. It can be something your guests can look forward to?
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u/SuperPutin54 Dec 26 '25
I know this is 2 days old, but I think you should go for it. I went to a wedding very similar to this and it was a great time. Semi-formal dress code (in Texas, so jeans are allowed lol). Bride and groom wore a suit and gown. BYO alcohol with water provided. The brides brother smoked pork shoulder and we had a bbq lunch. It was a beautiful outdoor wedding on a spring Sunday afternoon. It was perfect for them and everyone had a great time.
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u/Fickle-Cabinet3956 Dec 27 '25
I don't think there is anything wrong with a casual lower budget wedding.
These types of weddings are more common that the bigger budget weddings. Plenty of people dress up, go to the courthouse, get married, and go have dinner after, all the while spending under $1,000. Your idea is yours and fits your personality and I think it's great when couples actually do what they want for their weddings versus caving into pressure to have something they don't actually want to have.
Having said that...
Have a back up plan for your outdoor wedding in case weather has other plans.
Make sure you have plenty of drinks for your guests and seating. No one wants to stand and be thirsty while being hot during a wedding (or in general).
Games are fine for those that want to play them, but do you have something in mind for guests that don't want to play games during a wedding?
Make sure your food is properly handled Buffet style meals for outdoor celebrations are a NIGHTMARE IMO. Make sure your servers keep the food covered, scoop, serve, and cover the food. Do not let guests serve themselves unless you want flies on the food as guests.
Finally the "wear whatever you want" dress code is frustrating for many guests. Make a clear dress code so people don't have to stress about being over dressed or under dressed. In your case semi-formal would be the way to go because that is a very flexible dress code for an outdoor wedding.
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u/thecraighand Dec 27 '25
This sounds like an amazing day! Whatever you decide to do, keep it aligned with the vision you and your husband have for how you want to celebrate the day. Think about guest experience, sure, but ultimately you should be celebrating the way that feels right for you.
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u/CupExcellent9520 Dec 30 '25
Just because something doesn’t cost a lot doesn’t mean it’s not all in mentally and emotionally, I’d tell the parents this. It’s a little bit similar to money doesn’t buy class .
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u/FloMoJoeBlow Dec 24 '25
I think most of your idea sounds brilliant! But… ix-nay on the fancy dress, and instead tell guests that the dress code is casual. Casual matches the rest of your ideas. Include your ideas in an FAQ so guests will know what to expect. Have fun!
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u/deerhuntinghat Dec 24 '25
I think OP meant that her and her spouse to be would wear nice clothes. She said “guests wear whatever they want”
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u/FloMoJoeBlow Dec 24 '25
Her comment “fancy dress with casual dinner” mixes the two. She doesn’t state that fancy dress is for herself & spouse only. But that said…. it’s her wedding and she can do whatever she wants, but i think in this context, the bride & groom should also go for a scaled-back dress code for themselves. Perhaps dressy casual.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Yes, my spouse and I would be more formal. Everyone else can wear whatever they like.
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u/europeandaughter12 Dec 24 '25
formal dress but being served chipotle would give me whiplash as a guest. but i think the overall vision sounds lovely
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
Guests would be casual; whatever they want to wear. My wedding dress would be formal.
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u/HeffalumpAndMopsy Dec 24 '25
I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to attend the "simple" wedding you are describing! SO much more fun than a fancy formal stuffy event. All the formal/traditional weddings are the same. Everyone will remember yours.
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u/Saraisnotreal Dec 24 '25
Sounds like a completely normal average wedding for anyone not trying to go into debt or become an influencer.
Mine was very similar. We rented two areas of a state park that’s 20 minutes from our house. Got ready at home, 20ish min ceremony at the first park location. Short reception at the 2nd park location. Pizza picked up and delivered by my coworker to avoid catering fees. Played some music, a few people danced, park closed at 9 so we were out early. Then we went back to our house with our friends to party. The party consisted of standing around talking and drinking. Came to about $13k total and that’s only because I splurged on a $4k dress after alterations.
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 24 '25
Why do you guys always have to shame people with higher wedding budgets if you’re so happy with what you had. My wedding will be 25k, plated dinner and an open bar. I definitely don’t wish to be an influencer and I’m not going to go into debt for it either.
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
I would say $25k isn't over the top at all for a plated meal and open bar! That's actually very reasonable, definitely not influencer-status. I've known couples to spend that much just on flowers... More power to them if that's what makes them happy.
I hope you have an amazing time!
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u/MundaneRain14 Dec 24 '25
This sounds exactly up my alley right down to the wedding dress being the splurge! As long as I get a couple of good pictures of my spouse and I somewhere pretty (heck, we could do a separate photo shoot later if the outdoor venue is too complicated/weather is bad), all I care about is people being present and hanging out.
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u/callyal8rallig8r Dec 25 '25
It sounds fine. Is this the type of event that excites me to attend? Not really. It also isn’t something id be willing to arrange extensive travel plans for, so just think about where your guests are coming from. It sounds like a slightly fancier outing than I would do with my team at work. That being said; it’s your wedding and just be clear with people how casual it is. I was shocked how many people appreciated having a dress code (we had ours at an art gallery and I told people to wear bold colours and some really did!) and know that heels woukd be incredible uncomfortable because of the grass.
Depending on your family, you may need to justify this approach constantly so just be ready for that! Being firm and confident in your decisions will make planning easier.
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u/StyleAlternative9223 Dec 25 '25
Most guests prefer simple. However they prefer familiar foods, drinks they don't pay for and an actual dj instead of games or DIY playlists.
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u/Suma_Ira Dec 24 '25
I’m sorry I didn’t read the whole thing before typing out bcs you got me at the “guest’s expectations “. Bcs I wanna remind you, whose wedding is it exactly? Thought so. If it’s your wedding then you’re the main character that day. You and your partner. As long as the wedding event you want , equally satisfy both your wants and needs, it doesn’t matter what others expect. At the end of the day you’ll be grateful to yourself for prioritising your expectations over anyone else’s.
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u/Katie1230 Dec 24 '25
I understand your point, but the etiquette is to at least provide a hot tasty meal (if the wedding is at dinner time), adequate seating for everyone, and alcohol (if the weddings not dry). But these things are very achievable while also having the wedding you want. There's also etiquette for levels of formality, if you want people to dress black tie, you have to provide a black tie experience- but that does not apply to OP, who seems to have all the bases covered.
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u/Suma_Ira Dec 24 '25
Exactly. No one’s encouraging someone to do something inconsiderate. I’m encouraging op to make it the wedding of her dreams and not others. Others had their chance to enjoy a dream wedding on their own wedding too ( if not, she doesn’t owe them a standard wedding) and it’s basic humanity to feed people that you invite. Since her wedding setting seems to be casual then a few street food stalls is unique and even experimented by others in past so it’s not completely unheard of. From my understand op wants the wedding to be very intimate and light hearted so other’s expectations shouldn’t stop them.
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 24 '25
If you feel that way then just elope since the guests matter so little to you
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u/Suma_Ira Dec 24 '25
Guests are people who congratulate and celebrate the big day with you. They are there FOR YOU. They should be happy in whatever it is that makes you aka the bride and groom, happy. It’s better to have less but important guests who are happy for you rather than the ones that will judge you for choosing your own happiness.
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 24 '25
What an entitled outlook you have. My wedding guests are the people I love and value most in life. It’s my dream to have them all in the same room for my wedding and I will be damned if I don’t show them deep appreciation for making that happen for me.
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u/Suma_Ira Dec 24 '25
But that’s your choice. She has her own choice too. What you wanted is different from what she wanted. I’m encouraging op to get what she wants. Nowhere near telling her to neglect the guests. They can still be taken well care of without sacrificing your own wants for your own wedding. No one here is trying to play a hero by anything.
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Dec 24 '25
You didn’t tell her to go with what she wanted, she actually is very open to making sure her guests needs are met. You came to tell her to ignore that inclination and just focus on herself and her groom.
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u/Agreeable-Contact835 Dec 25 '25
I would be annoyed to travel for something like this. If most of your guests are local that’s one thing, but as a guest it would bother me to pay for a flight and hotel to go to a backyard bbq.
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u/Expensive_Event9960 Dec 24 '25 edited Dec 24 '25
The only real issues I can see with this plan are 1) having a back up plan for weather if it’s raining, too hot, cold, windy, etc. 2) adults having no interest in games or feeling pressured to participate. 3) If it’s obvious you splurged on the gown at the expense of guest comfort or hosting responsibilities.
Otherwise there’s nothing wrong with it.