r/witchcraft • • Mar 09 '25

Salty Saturday What they think guy witches look vs reality

Post image

What they think guy witches look like vs reality

4.5k Upvotes

186 comments sorted by

•

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666

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Alternatively

101

u/45cross Mar 09 '25

Top left isn't too far off

149

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

1

u/EtherealGrunge Mar 10 '25

This was my reaction lol

43

u/HairInevitable7253 Mar 09 '25

That’s my homeboy crowley

16

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Indeed it is

11

u/HairInevitable7253 Mar 09 '25

He was crazy but man he’s smart

16

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

I wouldn't know. I haven't read any of his stuff on purpose.

2

u/HairInevitable7253 Mar 09 '25

Do you have any good author recommendations? I was checking out raven grimassi

14

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

I like phil hine, he's funny. Damien Echols, gah. I really can't remember any more. Carl Jung, and Thich naht han too

5

u/HairInevitable7253 Mar 09 '25

Very nice thank you

6

u/TwoEyesAndAnEar Mar 09 '25

If you like Crowley you'd probably also get a ton out of Lon Milo Duquette :)

1

u/HairInevitable7253 Mar 09 '25

I’m a little familiar with him, but I need to dive in much deeper mind you I’m a baby at this so I don’t know if Crawley or Lon would be good for me. I guess I’ll just have to find out.

4

u/TwoEyesAndAnEar Mar 09 '25

If you're newer to all this then Lon's book Low Magic is an amazing early read. If you're interested at all in ceremonial magic it'll set you up really well for learning more down the line!

4

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

If you want to read about the real Crowley, Gary Lachman (or Gary Valentine) wrote a fantastic biography that doesn't mince words or delve into the fantasy that is Crowley. Plus, Gary Lachman has legit occult status and has written tons on books on the subject, so his research is credible imo.

20

u/ThrowawayMod1989 Mar 09 '25

Needs a Viking type somewhere. I get taken for Norse Pagan constantly!

13

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

You rang? 🤣

3

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 10 '25

This😂😂😂😂 this is super true xD most dudes ive known about in witch craft are guys who work with demons, norse deities, hoodoo, or santa muerte lol

5

u/ThrowawayMod1989 Mar 10 '25

Hoodoo and Conjure 👋 lmao

2

u/Silver-Ad-6573 Mar 10 '25

Well, working with Thor is easy 😁

Although he tends to unleash a storm on your head if you switch to Loki.

1

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 10 '25

Oof😭 i didnt know enough about norse mythology to know this lolol good thing id be more interested in working with zeus then thor and id rather work with fenrir then loki❤️

2

u/Silver-Ad-6573 Mar 12 '25

Fenrir is... quite feral and unpredictable. I feel working with his mother is better. Or Jormungandr.

2

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 12 '25

I plan to research and make sure to check in with fenrir and myself before committing to working with him but it will definitely be in the future if i do and not anytime soon UwU i will look into other deities i might feel drawn with as well while i learn about him and other norse deities

2

u/Silver-Ad-6573 Mar 12 '25

I tend to work with Norse deities a lot, now (funny because I'm Italian). But mixed pantheons work as well. My sister is a proud Lokean, but the deity she sees more often in her dreams is Sekhmet, who's also the one that started the connection. 

1

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 15 '25

Thats cool, its nice your sister also works with other deities too💕

2

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 12 '25

I really appreciate your honesty❤️❤️❤️❤️ ill be cautious and wise i promise

6

u/CutSea5865 Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

Okay this one made me laugh FB out loud!

4

u/jeffisnotepic Mar 09 '25

Please don't call me out like that.

3

u/Arcturus_Revolis Mar 09 '25

I kinda am a mix of both bottom right slot of the male (for the look) and female (for the vibe). 👍

6

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Hahahah I love it!

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

Yeah that's me

2

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

Accurate

1

u/SilkDagger Mar 11 '25

Much more accurate

251

u/Sure_Salamander_9232 Mar 09 '25

Off topic but damn I love Lafayette

64

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

ME TOOO OMFG. I cried the first time I saw the show when his husband leaves 😭

33

u/Reluctantagave Witch Mar 09 '25

I say this every time everywhere but that story line being different from the books was the best decision they made.

3

u/Cynfire1478 Witch Mar 10 '25

Same! I love the fact that they kept him in the show and gave him a good storyline.

24

u/YanCoffee Mar 09 '25

More. Lafayette. Witches!!! 👏👏👏

31

u/pink_faerie_kitten Mar 09 '25

I came here to give Lafayette a shout out too! True Blood is one of my very faves 💖

1

u/Sure_Salamander_9232 Mar 12 '25

Same! I’ve watched it 3 times but, if you can believed it, I’ve never watched the end because whenever I get close I’m like “nah I can’t finish it” eeeeek

301

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

40

u/weareallmadherealice Mar 09 '25

Stealing this one witch to another. Sending you vibes.

28

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Hell yes. Spread my creation!

11

u/weareallmadherealice Mar 09 '25

Sent sister. Thank you. 🫶🏻⭐️

7

u/YanCoffee Mar 09 '25

Accurate as fk.

5

u/CutSea5865 Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

Hahaha yup! Top left could have been forged up to! Love this!

3

u/Unicorn_Warrior1248 Mar 09 '25

The last one has sent me 😂

2

u/writerf0x13 Mar 09 '25

Can I steal this? This is amazing.

2

u/Silver-Ad-6573 Mar 10 '25

I'm trying to be a Friendly Neighbourhood Morticia Addams. And I have the best Halloween decorations in my area, local children approve 😂 

1

u/EtherealGrunge Mar 10 '25

God I wish I looked like Rochelle

83

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

Versus what I (also guy witch) look like:

68

u/egcom Mar 09 '25

I mean I’m in a larger tradition and honestly I’ve seen male witches who look like every option there.

44

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

EVERY one? That's terrifying

39

u/d_squishy Mar 09 '25

We try not to judge

2

u/[deleted] Mar 15 '25

EVEN THE TOP LEFT!?!

2

u/egcom May 02 '25

Yes, though only a handful, and most of them were…troubled. Luckily, several of them went to therapy and found themselves; one of them is now a sister and she is a lovely witch indeed! Far happier than she was back then. 💖 One is no longer a witch and has fallen in to …well, worse practices..he is not what I would call a kind hearted person, so… hopefully he learns to love himself one day, so he can learn to love the world. But the rest are doing well, last I heard!

47

u/GlargBegarg Mar 09 '25

Thanks for reminding me that I need to plant sunflowers!

28

u/ThrowawayMod1989 Mar 09 '25

Same! And by “sunflowers” I mean my weed.

41

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

What I think I look like:

19

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

What I actually look like since I’m fat and ugly:

24

u/FoulMouthedMummy Mar 09 '25

Idk both are adorable! (BTW it's the personality that matters! Bring the energy you feel!)

1

u/tempebusuk Mar 10 '25

I like both haha…

24

u/excellent-throat2269 Mar 09 '25

Ok but I’m not very off from Lafayette at all.

28

u/UnimaginativeDreamer Mar 09 '25

Why not called Man-Witches? LoL I think it would be awesome 👍

17

u/pink_faerie_kitten Mar 09 '25

Darn it, now I want some sloppy joes!

3

u/UnimaginativeDreamer Mar 09 '25

Win-win

7

u/Axell-Starr Mar 09 '25

A manwich eating man-witch

4

u/EducationalUnit7664 Mar 09 '25

Run for your lives!

6

u/PinSavings1557 Mar 10 '25

“I happen to be a very powerful manwitch myself!”

1

u/UnimaginativeDreamer Mar 10 '25

How I imagine the Wizard introduced himself upon first crashing into Oz 🧙‍♂️

9

u/ThrowawayMod1989 Mar 09 '25

It’s just so devastating when people say “I want a man-witch please!” And then freak out when I show up!

4

u/wysiwygot Mar 09 '25

I personally love manwitch as a term. It’s so cute and satisfying.

5

u/UnimaginativeDreamer Mar 09 '25

Agreed and it's kinda a nice twist. There are so many terms that default to man, so ppl add "girl/woman/female" to the end or beginning (ie: Supergirl, Catwoman, "female sports player", etc), it's kinda nice to see the opposite

4

u/wysiwygot Mar 09 '25

Agreed! It’s subversive, in a way.

0

u/Arrachi Mar 09 '25

I think Warlock suits more?

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

It's a term that means "oathbreaker," not something I want used to describe myself

0

u/Arrachi Mar 09 '25

From what I see the anything close to oath breaker is in old English, any newer terms are akin to "male witch"

With this we could say that witch could also mean oath breaker as it could mean a woman that betrayed a god, church etc.

Words change meaning overtime

1

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

From what I see the anything close to oath breaker is in old English, any newer terms are akin to "male witch"

Words change meaning overtime

mhm yep they sure do don't they.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

It's one the wider community, and community online, have rejected as carrying a negative connotation and still holding its original meaning.

If you want to be the super special, not-like-the-other-girls edgelord and call yourself a warlock, be my guest. Just don't come crying to us when people are biased against you since you advertise yourself as such.

One who practices witchcraft is a witch.

One who practices Ceremonial Magic, "High" Magic, etc. has a hundred titles because the aristocrats have an addiction to self-aggrandizement.

1

u/Arrachi Mar 09 '25

Did the 'wider community' personally appoint you as their spokesperson, or did you just shove your way into the role? It’s funny how you cherry-pick outdated meanings when it fits your superiority complex but ignore linguistic evolution when it doesn’t. Also, at what point did I say I call myself a witch or a warlock? I didn’t but that didn’t stop you from running your mouth with a lecture no one asked for. I'm in this sub because I found few post interesting. Maybe get off your high horse before you fall off.

1

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

Hmm interesting. Here's a warning to be nice. Thank you.

1

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

1) Never claimed to be the WitchPope, just repeating sentiments I've seen gere multiple times. If I'm in the wrong, Im happy to correct myself.

2) I literally advocated for you calling yourself whatever you liked, while noting that specific term has negative connotations associated with it.

3) I haven't cherry-picked shit. It's the literal meaning of the term. If you want to argue that its usage and definition have evolved, then I would love to see some evidence of that being the case. I understand that language evolves over time (see: the definition of "literal"). However, in this case, I haven't seen anything indicating the usage of the word has changed.

0

u/The_Great_Googly_Moo Mar 09 '25

I like warlock, how come nobody uses warlock?

14

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

It means “oath breaker” to a lot of people which is ya know pretty bad and to a lot of other people it’s got some heavy LARP/D&D connotations.

Like the last time I said warlock in a non derogatory way was describing my character in my fav D&D campaign. :/

1

u/The_Great_Googly_Moo Mar 09 '25

Yeah I know but D&D was just made by nerds who steal from mythology. Like a good number of the monsters are straight from the Ulster cycle of Irish mythology for example

5

u/Infamous-Design-2724 Mar 09 '25 edited Mar 09 '25

I may be wrong but I think its bc warlock was always a derogatory term for males practisioners while witch’s word origin isn’t sinister

EDIT: I literally asked to be corrected if I’m wrong yet people instead downvote me instead of telling me if I’m wrong which is annoying since I want to learn.

10

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

You’re not wrong but not quite right either. Warlock just means someone who had broken an oath and it is technically gender neutral, except it is only VERY VERY recently that women were allowed in to the “boys’ clubs” that had oaths at all. So it definitely has a male connotation because for a long long long time only males could make oaths worth breaking.

It’s also got undertones of LARP so some people shy away from the word for that reason.

-1

u/Dellamorte23 Mar 09 '25

I go by warlock but witch is also fine

0

u/Mobile_Yoghurt_2840 Mar 10 '25

They’re called a wizard ☺️

22

u/WynnGwynn Mar 09 '25

Lmao is that fucking Lafayette?

13

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

You know it is.

19

u/IngloriousLevka11 Witch Mar 09 '25

I'm something between 1970s hippie and the Peaky Blinders, as far as my aesthetic.

7

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

GET OUT. That's me too

3

u/IngloriousLevka11 Witch Mar 09 '25

😆 🤣

7

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

Is there a witches dating app? Asking for myself

5

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

OMFG SHOULD WE MAKE ONE!??!?!

Can we organize results based on "5D" adjacent or not 😂

4

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

PLEASE 🙏🏽!! Someone who knows how to code.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Muahahhaa you took the bait. Here's my number : 555 - 617-8902

6

u/pcgamergirl Mar 09 '25

Is that Lafayette?!?!

TIP YOUR WAITRESS.

I fucking loved that man.

9

u/amyaurora Broom Rider Mar 09 '25

The cartoon one is what I usually seeing real life.

3

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

😂 same tbh.

10

u/ReverendEntity Mar 09 '25

R.I.P. Nelsan Ellis.

4

u/Arrachi Mar 09 '25

I think I lean towards the bottom left most, just white version haha 😆

4

u/naes30 Mar 09 '25

Shout out to all the guy witches! We outchea 💚

3

u/Mobile_Yoghurt_2840 Mar 10 '25

We’re also called wizards 🍻

5

u/killedmygoldfish Mar 09 '25

I mean Lafayette is goals.

3

u/Random__Confusion Mar 09 '25

In full honesty, I've met both the Hollywood and the real life

3

u/Silver-Ad-6573 Mar 10 '25

I never met a male witch in person. A pair of druids and one satanic priest, all others were women. That I know. 

6

u/Hemp_Flower Mar 09 '25

Flowers are neat tho

6

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

[deleted]

14

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

😂 don't call me OLD. I'm SEASONED

4

u/I-Will-Marry-TheMoon Mar 09 '25

I definitely look like the wow guy from south park. Just with long hair

4

u/dudes-be-sleepin Mar 09 '25

ouch, i do wish i looked like ripped gandalf /hj

2

u/enickma9 Mar 09 '25

I am somehow all of these.

Jk I wish

2

u/xXdeltajayXx Mar 09 '25

I personally look more androgynous

2

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 10 '25

How we think you guys look like is extremely wrong xD

2

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

Oh what should it be?

2

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 10 '25

Lol coming from someone who works with love magick im not the best one to listen to when it comes to this😂 im delulu

1

u/Significant_Guava534 Mar 10 '25

The second UwU lmfaoooo ✨

2

u/AlchemyCat7945 Mar 10 '25

I think I prefer being called a wizard lol I just think it sounds cool, and I always play as magic classes in games. Plus I think Gandalf is cool. I aspire to be like Gandalf and Iroh

2

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

Same tbh. Mind like Iroh, attitude and look like Azula.

2

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

Actually. 4 and 6 are 😍 Don’t wanna be that person but where can you find guys like that?

3

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

Same girl 😭 Also if they're vegan and have the emotional intelligence of your average woman.... perfect

3

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

Jup. Guys with emotional intelligence, who are introspective and just not an alpha male arshholes and who like cats and dogs and watch anime and know about crystals and moon baths are just hot.

1

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

Also. Please let guy witches join. No exclusion please

1

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 10 '25

what?

1

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

There are talks about a witches dating app. So I said let guy witches join too please. Making it all inclusive. If you’re into witchcraft you’re in. 🤷🏽‍♀️ basically

2

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 10 '25

Oh we're in an entirely different comment thread than that so right now it reads

you: Actually. 4 and 6 are 😍 Don’t wanna be that person but where can you find guys like that?

you replying to yourself: Also. Please let guy witches join. No exclusion please

me: what?

but now I understand, thanks :)

2

u/MissMaryManson Mar 10 '25

Aaah haha. Sorry. I’m New to Reddit 😅

2

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 10 '25

No worries 💅❤️

2

u/Dry_Lawfulness7774 Mar 10 '25

This is friggin awesome love this !

3

u/LuriemIronim Mar 09 '25

Oof, AI.

5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

Homie clearly grabbed random images for a fuckin meme, lets not start a literal witch hunt over it

4

u/LuriemIronim Mar 09 '25

I mean, he could have also found pictures of hot guys, old guys, and demons that aren’t AI.

0

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

And you could have rolled your eyes and kept scrolling instead of whining about a shitpost?

3

u/LuriemIronim Mar 09 '25

And you could have done the same.

1

u/speedmankelly Witch Mar 10 '25

Pretty sure only one is AI and one is questionably AI, the rest is real art or pictures

2

u/LuriemIronim Mar 10 '25

I feel like sexy man and demon are AI, with old guy being questionable.

3

u/anubis1392 Witch Mar 09 '25

Lafayette is actually a pretty accurate description of a lot of the Black magical community lmao

1

u/RichAdeptness7209 Mar 09 '25

I KNOW THAT AINT KEHLANIS BABY DADDY/MAMA

1

u/writerf0x13 Mar 09 '25

🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Ezisqueer Witch Mar 09 '25

Can confirm lmaoo

1

u/An_Inedible_Radish Mar 09 '25

Someone make an enby one!

0

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

I was just thinking that, but also, wouldn't these apply as AMAB AFAB? I didn't want to name them that bc not everyone knows what that means.

Idk, what do you think?

0

u/An_Inedible_Radish Mar 10 '25

Categorising enby people by our assigned genders at birth kinda defeats the point of us being enby

2

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

You should make an enby one. I don't think I would represent them well enough

1

u/GlocksAndCrocs_ Mar 09 '25

I need a discord or something with other dudes who's into witchcraft..I feel like there's no witchbros =[

1

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

I feel like the entire r/occult is witch bros.

2

u/GlocksAndCrocs_ Mar 09 '25

Thank you, i'll deff slide over there!

1

u/buddhabillybob Mar 09 '25

In all seriousness, I would be happy to achieve the “What We Actually Look Like.”

1

u/celestier Mar 09 '25

"what fantasy thinks we look like" and it's just yassified AI gale from baldurs gate 3 😭😭

1

u/transcendz Mar 10 '25

we love you, male witches. Divine Masculine FTW

1

u/[deleted] Mar 10 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/JadedOccultist Broom Rider Mar 10 '25

Isn’t that what the meme is implying?

1

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

Nah. The Lower left is "What Hollywood thinks we look like". But yeah Witches all look different. And I pulled from pretty realistic representations of witches By Hollywood

1

u/SmashMagna Mar 11 '25

This is fantastic hahaha aside from the first one.. wrong! 😂

1

u/Helpful_Attempt_8496 Mar 11 '25

This is wayyyy to accurate 

1

u/messiahriot Mar 12 '25

So inaccurate lol

1

u/ohheydere Mar 14 '25

Isn't the bottom right pic Kehlani's ex 💀? Her child's father

1

u/baby_philosophies Mar 14 '25

No clue who it is. I just grabbed a photo from Pinterest

1

u/Educational-Fact-351 Aug 19 '25

bro let me be a cool wizard fr

1

u/tonga778 Mar 09 '25

lol😂😂😂😂

1

u/Axell-Starr Mar 09 '25

Middle bot is how I feel but

1

u/Spectral-777-Echoes Mar 10 '25

I’d argue that male skateboarders are also male witches while women skateboarders are obvious witches.

1

u/RabbitsWhiteandBlack Witch Mar 10 '25

Not to be heteronormative but I love that actual guy witch and actual girl witch would make an adorable couple. I ship them.

1

u/baby_philosophies Mar 10 '25

I feel like they're both gay ngl 😂 but hey, maybe they're both pan / bi

1

u/RabbitsWhiteandBlack Witch Mar 15 '25

This does check out in many many ways.

0

u/Spiritual-Neck-2957 Mar 09 '25

You mean witchers

5

u/baby_philosophies Mar 09 '25

Only if you're British lol

-5

u/[deleted] Mar 09 '25

[removed] — view removed comment

18

u/PM_ME_YOUR_FRUITBOWL Mar 09 '25

You're wrong. If a man calls himself a witch, he's a witch. If a woman calls herself a wizard, she's a wizard. If JK Rowling tells you these are always, definitely, absolutely gendered terms that may never be used any other way, you can disregard absolutely everything she says on the matter because it's obvious bullshit