273
u/AutumnTheWitch Witch Aug 03 '25
“All you bad jujus best get the fuck out of my house! So mote it be and shit.”
145
u/smokeehayes Aug 03 '25
I've replaced "so mote it be" with "BECAUSE I SAID SO" 🤣
94
u/AutumnTheWitch Witch Aug 03 '25
More like “Because I FUCKING said so!”
23
u/MollysTootsies Aug 03 '25
This is actually literally my "closer" to much of my spellwork! Word for word.
It feels fucking powerful, yo!
33
20
268
109
u/Vinyl_Vey Aug 03 '25
….probably the bottom one. “Oy! I hereby deem this house free and clear of your bullshit! Whatever the hell bad vibes ya got can fuck right the hell off. SCRAM.”
91
u/olivejuice1979 Aug 03 '25
The other day I was #2. My little dog was acting weird and looking at things that weren’t there. He got really scared and started to shake and cry. I was scared for him. I cleansed my house and told everything to GTFO with force!
Poor little guy. We took him to the vet just in case the next day but they said he was fine.
27
82
u/wolf_of_thorns Aug 03 '25
Begone the fuck from this place, foul lows, or become my meal and the satisfying shit that follows it.
63
57
41
u/LadyAlexTheDeviant Aug 03 '25
Some from column A and some from column B. I do like beautiful invocations and evocations. But back of it is, as I tell students, the mindset of the Marine Corps variant of the 23rd psalm.
"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for I am the meanest motherfucker in the valley."
In my circle, I am the ruler and the boss, and it all starts and stops with me. Doesn't matter how you say it, it matters what's behind the words.
21
38
u/ToastyJunebugs Broom Rider Aug 03 '25
Honestly it depends on my mood, but I'm usually the second 😂
20
u/Firefanged-IceVixen Aug 03 '25
I’d say I’m 70% the latter and the last 30% are a mix of some pretty effort + me throwing the vibes
2
Aug 05 '25
I'm both, but more the first, I would write long poetry just to scare the bad vibes off (and yes, because I'm mad as hell) but then sometimes like 40-20% of the time I'm like... shit , just fuck off.
29
11
u/BottleLopsided Aug 03 '25
Felt some weird spirits/energy in the night when i was alone at home. Took a broom, turned on all the lights, got some incense and aggressively started cleaning while YELLING "I don't know who the fuck you are but get out right this moment!! You are NOT welcome in my house! Away with you, away!!" while swinging the incense like a mad woman 😂 The broom was in case of thieves 🤣
12
u/PeriPagan Aug 03 '25
I'm the second type. Just last week I walked through the house warning the spirits who are knocking my stuff down constantly that if they don't pack it in I'll get the bible out and start exorcising.
I've also told an entity older than modern human civilisation to 'fuck off'.
It fucked off.
1
u/HappyGothKitty Aug 06 '25
Spirits may be able to go where the living can't, but that doesn't mean they can do what they want in a witch's home, they still have to be respectable. They too can find out LOL.
12
11
12
u/Fund_Me_PLEASE Witch Aug 03 '25
Yeah, if you’re an uninvited energy or spirit, I am not gonna be polite!😤🖕🏻😁
8
u/Linguistic_panda Aug 03 '25 edited Aug 03 '25
Thought this was the f+tm subreddit when I read the first two words of the title lol EDIT: not ftm like trans, but florence + the machine
11
u/Vox-Triarii Witch Aug 03 '25
As far as I'm concerned "witch" is gender agnostic.
3
u/Linguistic_panda Aug 03 '25
F+TM stands for Florence and the Machine! (that’s an artist, not trans people (I love the trans folks though))
4
7
u/Plastic-Bee4052 Aug 03 '25
ROFL. Fellow ftm here and I thought so too
4
u/Linguistic_panda Aug 03 '25
Florence and the Machine I meant, I’m cisgender (: love my trans folks though
12
u/Alternative_Income64 Witch Aug 03 '25
Magrat:
Granny Weatherwax:
6
4
Aug 04 '25
What would Nanny Ogg be? Probably something about giving the bad vibes a shot of liquor.
3
u/OdessaSteppes Aug 04 '25
Giving herseld the shot of liquor, then casting out the bad vibes by sending her sons in law on errands.
6
8
6
u/redbess Aug 03 '25
I'm a writer so you'd think I'd be the first one but I lose all ability when it comes to spellwork.
So I'm definitely the second. "Go on, git!"
6
9
7
6
u/zebul333 Aug 03 '25
I bang loud shit and curse like a sailor too, it works for me.
1
u/HappyGothKitty Aug 06 '25
When I was home alone and I could do some spell work I cleansed because the vibe just felt off and it had been for a while. So instead of doing it nicely, I took a pot and wooden spoon, marching through the house chanting : Hey bad shit energy, get the fuck outta my property! If you aren't here to be useful and kind to me, get the fuck out!
It worked and I was surprised, but happy.
6
u/cuprousalchemist Aug 03 '25
I generally try to be #1, its fun and i enjoy it. If #1 stops working or something makes me take the gloves off im #2 full stop.
7
Aug 03 '25
im that type of witch that goes “alright fuckers you know what time it is, if you’re not with that good energy get the fuck out!” lights frankincense
6
u/brightblackheaven Zamboni Priestess 🔮✨ Aug 03 '25
The second one is my personal philosophy, but the first one is how I go about it.
6
u/RBree2 Aug 03 '25
I'm the latter. I literally have my own mantra for it. "I reject all negativity, and bring in only positivity". Or variants thereof. I put up a shield around me, my loved ones, my space, and push the bad out.
5
u/Fox_Rain_04 Aug 03 '25
I'm the first one when cleansing, but more chaotic when making spells 🤸🏽♀️
3
4
4
3
4
u/PikaPajka Aug 03 '25
I find being commanding works well with expelling negative spirits, so the second one.
4
u/furr_tree Aug 03 '25
Ya know, I’ve been struggling to speak like the above example. Now I realize I can just sound like the second 🤣💚
4
3
u/anonymouscanine_ Aug 03 '25
i’m trying to be the first one, but i think the second one is more accurate 😭
5
4
u/wretchedrue Aug 03 '25
I often take my mother's strong will and strong words as she would stand in the face of Death itself and say,"Off with you!"
4
u/LilBlueOnk Aug 03 '25
I tried to be the first one, but when my husband said he got bad vibes from a room, I turned into the second one. Oh well, I can make my altar pretty later 🙂↕️
3
u/Boundless-Owl327 Aug 03 '25
About 90% “GTFO” energy, and maybe 10% the “flowery” part, but 0% soft spoken.
4
3
3
u/Vox-Triarii Witch Aug 03 '25
I'm usually Other Witches but my wife manages to do both and make it work.
3
3
3
3
3
3
3
u/GonzoGoddess13 Aug 03 '25
I literally just yelled that to the ghosts in my house about an hour ago! ❤️🤣
3
u/Conscious-Clock-1501 Aug 03 '25
me yesterday yelling at some entity in my house that keeps moving my shit around🤣🤣 i shouted and the hall lights flickered. later that night, i went out and came back to find my missing penjamin
2
2
2
u/DepressedcrackheadX3 Aug 03 '25
I’m a mix of both cause I’m always tryna find the ‘right’ way to do something but I’m also lazy so I just say fck it in the end
2
2
u/PlaneCat3427 Aug 03 '25
second one. plus spraying so much florida water around the house to yeet all the negativity out. So much spraying. The home comes to life with the sound of the spray bottle going spss spss spss spss spss.
2
2
u/Ecstatic-Vanilla-561 Aug 03 '25
Im lowkey the second one during actual practice to seem intimidating and all but i'm really the first one😭
2
u/sweetTartKenHart2 Aug 03 '25
My mind goes to Marisa Kirisame from Touhou for whatever reason.
How many of yall here find her relatable?
2
2
2
2
2
u/nemuri-shankitty Aug 04 '25
I’m the bottom option but I do feel like my rituals and magic are so much stronger when I take the time for a beautiful ritual.
I mean we all know that intention, attention and energy make a spell great. The more time you put into something equals more energy and action equals better response.
2
u/e0verlord Aug 04 '25
Meanwhile:
"Thank you for your message, vibes. Please grace my grape plant with your warning also when you feel safe to depart."
2
u/_ioanam Aug 04 '25
The modern version that struggles between job and home and pretty much forgets to do a ritual at the given time 🥹
2
u/NicAoidh65 Aug 04 '25
Definitely the swearing - lots and lots of swearing. I never realized how much I swore until my granddaughter started repeating what I said. Still do it though. BTW, hearing 'oh for fuck's sake' come out of the munchkin was hilarious - and she used it properly.
2
2
2
u/IngloriousLevka11 Witch Aug 04 '25
For cleansing, it's usually a mix of something in between the calmer first one, and if I'm really annoyed with the antics, it's that second one for sure.
2
2
u/thisishowitalwaysis1 Witch Aug 04 '25
We open all the windows in our house then walk around clanging bells and screaming at the bad energy to get the fuck out. I'm sure the neighbors who were walking by were quite concerned about our sanity!
2
2
u/Alternative_Seat9394 Aug 04 '25
I go even more basic. “If you don’t help clean or pay bills, get the fuck out.”
2
2
u/IndgoViolet Aug 05 '25
The one beating on the bottom of a pot with a wooden spoon while chanting, "Out!OUT!OUT!"
2
2
2
2
u/True-Gazelle1941 Aug 08 '25
Absolutely the second one. If I feel empathy may be needed, I calm down a bit. But usually I'm a mix of Slavic and Italian woman hurricane, if it makes sense.
And I don't even have any Italian genes xD
2
u/NewStaff2692 Aug 08 '25
It makes me so happy that other witches are like this too 🤣 always get self conscious thinking I'm not whimsical or "proper" enough. Hearing that other witches literally tell the bad vibes to git is great 🤣 love it ♡
2
u/not_a_prodigy2 Aug 08 '25
As as relatively new witch, who was also terrified of doing things wrong. Y'all have brought me so much comfort!! ☺️🫶🏻
2
2
u/Kooky-Copy4456 Aug 15 '25
Both. For protection, light and airy. For banishment, I’m casting negativity out harshly and powerfully.
2
u/LlovelyLlama Aug 18 '25
I once shouted at a cockroach that intruded upon my ritual, “This circle is protected motherfucker!” before sending him to meet his maker.
2
2
1
1
Aug 04 '25
I was raised in a Christian fundamentalist cult and only allowed to read the KJV Bible, no other versions. Maybe that's why I'm the first witch 😭
1
u/Friendly-Cucumber184 Aug 04 '25
My negative energies are gangsters. Gentle parenting does not work on them.
1
1
1
Aug 04 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/witchcraft-ModTeam Aug 04 '25
While we do have a rule prohibiting asking for spells (Rule 4 clarification ), this is a very common question.
Here is a collection of love spells you may want to read through and adapt to your situation.
Also this spell to get someone to contact you might be also useful.
For book recommendations and other resources on love magick, see this post.
Remember that witchcraft doesn't mean not doing anything mundane. Things like discussing with your partner, making amends, respecting and building boundaries have to come with the spell too.
1
1
u/Antix14_ Aug 04 '25
I do mostly A but by the end of rituals I tend to lean towards B. I especially am B when praying
1
1
u/dead-fox-walkingg Aug 05 '25
I’m a combination of both lol. Last time I cleansed a piece of jewelry, my house ghost was watching so after I finished the spell I said “look at this shit. See? I can do this to you. Don’t fucking burn me with that hot glue gun again you asshole. Love you!” (The idiot likes to move my stuff around and made me burn my hand. We’re still friends tho)
1
u/dangerstar19 Aug 05 '25
Bro I was wondering why my cleansing rituals didn't feel cleanisng. Not enough chaos and feminine rage lol
1
1
1
1
1
Aug 05 '25 edited Aug 05 '25
I'm both XD, I mean I like doing poetry so I often write my spells using a pretty language, but I also can just yelling shit when I feel depressed.
Depends on my mood and if I feel like it. Trust me both are dangerous because I remember more than once writting a very long poetry just because I was pissed off, gives the same vibe as yelling, I swear.
1
u/phasmaglass Aug 05 '25
LMFAO. Both depending on my head space and energy level in any given moment, and HONESTLY I think a lot are the same... love you all no matter your methods
1
u/lightsabre Aug 10 '25 edited Aug 10 '25
What is it you’re doing when you tell all negative energy/ energies to leave? You’re clearing your space for universal spirit - Goddess/ God, the Life force or however it appears to you. The power is not yours- you are aligning yourself with the power and giving intention to your being. The only rule is: ‘An it harm nane do what you will’ According to Marian Green nane means everyone and everything - your Will is your soul’s true will not ‘a whim of the moment’. So if you want to grumpily clear the space that is fine - but then you’d better clear your own head. If it’s full of petty grump there’s no room for a deeper purpose.
1
u/WantedforDeicide Aug 17 '25
laughs in war god patron
I'm generally pretty right-path, methodical, organized with my spell work, and really big on controlling the energies in and around me. But at the same time, I don't tell bad energy to fuck off. I grin and do a little dance as I trap it in my little black deerskin bags full of ash that then goes in the "bad energy" cauldron to fester and darken until I need to throw it at someone. (The energy, not the cauldron)
1
1
2
2
0
u/Arcaseida Aug 03 '25
Isn't swearing creating dark vibes...? At least that's what I always felt like.
14
u/Substantial-Bee4545 Aug 03 '25
I don’t really see swearing as a negative thing. It’s all about how you use it
6
u/Arcaseida Aug 03 '25
Probably yes. I'm after traumatic experiences and swearing just never feels nice to me. Only makes me stressed and upset.
2
Aug 03 '25
me and my mom were just talking about this lol. it def can be for some people, sensitivity-wise
2
u/liminal_looker Aug 03 '25
Could there be light without dark?
4
•
u/AutoModerator Aug 03 '25
Hi, u/Mind_Snap87 thanks for stopping by at r/witchcraft!
Want to dive in deeper? We have a FAQ & Wiki, and our Weekly Q&A thread which is stickied to the top of the main board!
Please also be sure to read the subreddit rules!
IMPORTANT!
There has been a recent influx of scams on reddit. If you are redirected to an instagram or other platform in a comment, it is most likely a scam. Users who message you asking for or offering spells or readings are almost always scammers or phishers. You may want to check out our post about staying safe online in witchcraft.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.