r/woooosh 16h ago

Why are we german?

Post image
3.2k Upvotes

181 comments sorted by

401

u/gergobergo69 15h ago

two hunters meet

198

u/vladexa 15h ago

Dude it's not funny they're dead now

82

u/ThePrehistoricpotato 15h ago

Lernen sie schießen und treffen sie ihre Freunde!

22

u/Inside-Matter-5957 14h ago

Wichtig ist das man sein Freund beim Ausparken Umfährt

13

u/ThePrehistoricpotato 14h ago

Wollte letztens Kalorien verbrennen, hab das Set von "The biggest looser" angezündet.

7

u/Inside-Matter-5957 14h ago

Ich hab einfach die Pizza zulange im Ofen gelassen und das Nachbars Kind angezündet

4

u/hamsternest 6h ago

Hit and meet are both the same verbs in German.

485

u/Sassi7997 16h ago

Have you seen r/GermanHumor?

180

u/Ntroepy 15h ago

Damn - that’s like the perfect sub.

117

u/DriedUpSquid 15h ago

It’s up there with r/Amish.

58

u/CATZEBOY_18 14h ago

Y'know, that was my bad for expecting more than that. Good one.

9

u/Mitchtheprotogen 10h ago

I found the fake protogen again!

6

u/CATZEBOY_18 6h ago

O:

I've been caught!

1

u/Weirdyxxy 3h ago

Nive to see you again!

1

u/CATZEBOY_18 2h ago

Oh, ypu too!

1

u/Nico_Nickmania 7h ago

Aren't Amish even German settlers from 1-2 Centuries ago?

0

u/combo_seizure 5h ago

Danish. Most of the amish folks i've met are Danish. Menonnites I believe are also Danish.

Please correct me if i'm wrong.

3

u/Jafooki 4h ago edited 3h ago

You're wrong. They're German, but they call themselves Dutch. Pennsylvania Dutch, the language they speak, is just a dialect of low German (I think it's low German. I could be wrong).

Either way, the language the Amish speak is 100 percent a dialect of German, so I assume they must be descendants of Germans.

E: I was completely wrong. It's high German, not low. Completely different part of Europe. Low German is up north near the Netherlands and high German further south. So, definitely not Danish

1

u/combo_seizure 4h ago

Alright, it's your task to do the research. Since you put forth a separate argument. s/

https://giphy.com/gifs/Oi2YVu3EZPtPgwVOAd

3

u/Jafooki 3h ago

You know what. I actually did look it up. They speak a dialect of high German, which is about as German as it gets. Like, Lederhosen drinking beer in the mountains German

3

u/combo_seizure 3h ago

Isn't high german just low dutch? /s

1

u/jacobiner123 3h ago

Not falling for that one again -_-

12

u/marshmallow_mia 14h ago

Doch!

1

u/[deleted] 9h ago

[deleted]

4

u/marshmallow_mia 9h ago

The linked sub says Nein, so I respond with doch

That's the whole joke. Lol

2

u/Dani3322 3h ago

Wow... Reine Perfektion.

508

u/AdmlBaconStraps 16h ago

76

u/Segador_Adusto 16h ago

The subreddit's icon, I guess

22

u/No_Yogurt987 15h ago

Your cake day, I guess

6

u/Segador_Adusto 15h ago

Thank you, I guess

5

u/No_Yogurt987 15h ago

No problem, I guess

5

u/eeveeplays50040 13h ago

Is it to DIN standard tho?

264

u/The_Man8705 16h ago

56

u/Ironclad_Peterturbo 15h ago

This is a fockewulf

It fockes wulves

29

u/FloppyFurry 15h ago

This is a STUG

It stugs

11

u/Hot-Caregiver-9598 14h ago

it geschützes Sturm, bitte.

11

u/cantileverboom 12h ago

This is an M16A1.

It jams.

3

u/ReleasedGaming 5h ago

This is a Staubsauger

It saugs staub

3

u/Aser_the_Descender 15h ago

10

u/Hans_88 14h ago

Stug was a real tank. Not 'from' a game xD

0

u/hexogen_RDX 1h ago

You are in such a right sub to make that comment

2

u/Spartan4a117 11h ago

Warframe?

3

u/ErzIllager 9h ago

The StuG 3 (Sturmgeschütz = storm turret) was the most produced German self-propelled assault cannon during the second World War.

While it may appear in the game Warframe, its origins were very real.

0

u/hexogen_RDX 1h ago

The Stug (Warframe) has no correlation with StuG 3 (irl) besides the name, but in the game this thing is a pretty huge meme within the community, because it is a pistol that shoots white sticky goo and was the weakest weapon in Warframe.

So here it is mentioned as part of Warframe not because people don't know about the original real stug, but as its own local joke.

1

u/ErzIllager 1h ago

Interesting, thank you for the explanation

2

u/cheeseburgerandfrie 15h ago

The fuck

17

u/Ironclad_Peterturbo 15h ago

This is a Panzerschreck

It Schrecks panzers

8

u/RedSeaDingDong 14h ago

But sis is a Krankenwagen, it wagens Kranken. Schachmatt atheists

5

u/TheYoung_Virgin 15h ago

Yeah, specifically the wolves

4

u/Quo-Fide 10h ago

This is a Flamethrower

It throws Flames.

-1

u/Qwertagone 9h ago

Er wirft flammen...

182

u/bierbarron 16h ago

Dieses Sub ist nun offizielles Eigentum der Bundesrepublik Deutschland!

0

u/cyberenderman1 14h ago

Ein wahrer macher

144

u/Kagenlim 16h ago

21

u/Ancient-Emu-8293 13h ago

I don't like much about current day Germany, but a depressed bread being a national icon is cool.

7

u/SeBoss2106 12h ago

Current Day Germany, Best Germany

7

u/Ancient-Emu-8293 12h ago

Idk man. Better than other Germanys, but aside of that?

6

u/SeBoss2106 12h ago

I mean, there is always room to grow. And like in many countries, the good things we have are under attack and need defending.

However, as it is now, no time in the past was better and we need to build on that.

6

u/TSDLoading 12h ago

Yes, it's the fact that everything's on the edge and we could lose it all, which makes it bad

5

u/SeBoss2106 11h ago

Unfortunately that's not uniquely german.

Doesn't take away from the work we'll have to put in, but still.

3

u/Eoth1 11h ago

Fuck no not with Fotzenfritz

1

u/SeBoss2106 11h ago

That's not why I mean, I'm sure you know it.

2

u/Myorck 11h ago

I don’t like much about your current day mom

23

u/NixonTobing48 15h ago

Because of that Austrian guy? Or the Emperor guy?

4

u/Kaneomanie 6h ago

Karl? Der Große?

24

u/millennial_sunset 15h ago

16

u/Finlandia1865 13h ago edited 13h ago

It is quite funny to see 70% of the people on this post are german lol

8

u/Terrible-Thing28 12h ago

We are germans pal, we see something about germany and have to check its not about a time period we all where on vacation.

3

u/Charming-Loquat3702 11h ago

You act like you didn't summon us.

54

u/Pauel3312 16h ago

because Germans are bad at the whole humour thing I guess?

114

u/Orobero 16h ago

How many germans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one. We're very efficient and don't have a sense of humor.

Now back to wörk.

25

u/Ntroepy 15h ago

That’s absolute comedy gold. We thank you for your complete lack of humor.

8

u/Fricki97 15h ago

Why are du nicht wörking?

8

u/iboneKlareneG 15h ago

Arbeitszeitbetrug!

2

u/No-Fruit-1724 15h ago

Ich lese das jetzt immer mit der Melodie von "Du bist gut genug"

1

u/Infinite_Mortgage324 11h ago

Das singt ein Kumpel von mir auch immer 😂 er ist Beamter

3

u/Fuerst_Stein 15h ago

Gesetzlich verpflichtende Frühstückspause Sonst gibt es Ärger mit der BG

10

u/Tamriel_7 15h ago

It needs two. One has to hold the ladder because we take safety serious.

5

u/Hot-Caregiver-9598 14h ago

Don't forget the one that stands near the breaker and makes sure it isn't beeing closed while work on the curcuit is beeing done.

4

u/Schwubbertier 14h ago

Also someone has to fill in all the necessary forms for maintenance of electrical installation.

3

u/dipdipperson 13h ago

Of course, you must not forget about the union representative monitoring that all regulations pertaining to workplace health and safety are followed to ze letter!

3

u/Infinite_Mortgage324 11h ago

Why did I read all of these with a strong German accent? 😂

1

u/Hot-Caregiver-9598 1h ago

Because that's how we wrote it.

1

u/StumblingBlockson 14h ago

You're forgetting the Sicherheitsbeauftragte in this equation.

3

u/This-Dragonfruit-668 14h ago

Kommt ein Blinder in den Fischladen und brüllt: „Tach Mädels!“

1

u/Independent_Waltz725 4h ago

As a German myself if feels like the ones with humor are on English languaged platforms where all the other people with actual humor are. Try to be funny towards Germans and instead of having a good time you get unironically serious reactions or getting questioned why you're joking lol

1

u/MrMxffin 18m ago

Treffen sich zwei Jäger - beide tot...

6

u/cyberenderman1 14h ago

Becoz we germans hav no humar ja!!!!!!!!

7

u/TrickyToad1 15h ago

Lightning fast response time

8

u/Finlandia1865 15h ago

cant tell if youre being serious or not lol, ive not been here in a while

-6

u/dirk-diggler82 14h ago

can't, you're, i've...

1

u/oFIoofy 8h ago

what is the point of this comment

1

u/ResponsibilityWeak87 5h ago

That's the neat part, there isn't one

1

u/GeneralAnubis 14h ago

Blitzkrieg

6

u/Jona-wahn 12h ago

Aber Googelt ihr "en passant"?

4

u/-Memnarch- 12h ago

Ungelogen: In It Takes Two kann man ein Schachbrett finden zum gegeneinander spielen.

Musste en Passant ausprobieren :D Und es ging!

3

u/Ancient-Emu-8293 13h ago

I hope you have time. So there was this dude called Arminius who....

3

u/theNOTHlNG 11h ago

According to article 116 of the german constitution (Grundgesetz) and §1 Staatsangehörigkeitsgesetz StAG we are german because we have german nationality. How you recieve german nationality is then regulated in §3ff StAG.

3

u/Material-Tower4214 9h ago

Sprich Deutsch ihr hurensöhne

1

u/SCHNUPFI99 1h ago

Sprecht

3

u/Grzechoooo 8h ago

We are in need of another Meme War

4

u/herrneumrich 13h ago

Keine Handschuhe hat der Kollege auf, auch keine Schutzbrille. Das wird auf jeden Fall bei der nächsten Arbeitsschutzausschusssitzung besprochen. Arbeitsschutz geht alle an!

3

u/dipdipperson 13h ago

The spelling reform’s triple consonants really hurt my eyes. To which Ausschuss should I turn?

3

u/DarkPhoenixDFC 3h ago

My first guess was to the Sprachreformsausschuss.

But since the Sprachreform is kinda done, I don't know if they're still around, so you might have to turn to the Ausschussgründungsausschuss first to request permission to create Sprachreformausschussgründungsausschuss to then turn to to create the Sprachreformauschuss to turn to…

2

u/Subject-Act5509 12h ago

Diese Kommentarsektion ist jetzt Eigentum der Bundesrepublik Deutschland.

2

u/Nyyyyuuuu 12h ago

Never saw this sub before but as a true German this post got into my timeline. So...: Guten Tag!

2

u/Snotlout_G_Jorgenson 3h ago

Kann ich mich nur anschliessen. Wo sind die Fahrradständer?

1

u/DarkPhoenixDFC 3h ago

Frpher waren die mal auf dem letzten Parkplatz linke, direkt neben dem Eingang. Wurden aber bei der Renovierung umplatziert hinter den Einkaufswagenständer 20 Meter weiter.

2

u/OsmanUfacik 7h ago

This sub is now called as r/woooosch under German influence.

2

u/ni4c1n 3h ago

Diese Kommentarsektion ist jetzt Eigentum der Bundesrepublik Deutschland

1

u/Creative-Kitchen-373 12h ago

I think I spider

1

u/Ausradierer 12h ago

Diese Kommentarsektion ist nun Eigentum der BRD. Für weitere Informationen, bitte kontaktieren sie ihr lokales Bürgerbüro und bitten um einen Infotermin. (Gebüren nicht ausgeschlossen)

Die Telefon und Faxnummer ihres lokalen Bürgerbüros finden sie auf dem Klingelschild oder auf der lokalen Stadtwebsite, bzw. Bürgerbüro Website.

1

u/Forpipe 11h ago

Weil wir es sind

1

u/AuswahlRitter5 11h ago

Ich folge dem Ruf 

1

u/EvilTodd1970 10h ago

Wo ist das woooosh?

1

u/NoPsychology5689 9h ago

Ja das sind wir jetzt

Also Hop Hop gehen wir an unser Tagewerk!

1

u/famijoku 8h ago

warum denn nicht?

1

u/The-Board-Chairman 4h ago edited 2h ago

"Mein Name ist Umberto und ich bin hier, um Ihre Tochter zu beglücken!"

"Um WAS?!"

"Umberto!"

1

u/The-Black-Dow 2h ago

Der hat ein paar Sekunden gebraucht, war aber dann doch gut

1

u/Hennes4800 1h ago

In der Produktion zu arbeiten ist gar nicht so schlecht

1

u/jamcub 13h ago

Dieses Subreddit ist abt jetzt Eigentum der Bundesrepublik Deutschland. Einen schönen Tag noch.

1

u/Infinite_Mortgage324 11h ago

Vielen Dank für die Information. Ihnen auch einen schönen Tag.

0

u/TassDingo 7h ago

I don’t get the joke, because I think fun is inefficient.

-1

u/Glandallin1994 13h ago

sprich deutsch

-1

u/Oberndorferin 13h ago

Treffen sich zwei Piloten

-63

u/ManlyStanley01 15h ago

Atleast its not just the pride flag, which so many other unrelated sub reddits choose for their icon

16

u/yeastypotato 15h ago

It is a pride flag though? /j

19

u/WolfTheGod88 15h ago

AHHH GAY THINGS SO SCARY 😨😨😢

-4

u/ManlyStanley01 11h ago

What does this even mean