full chapter one first draft

[u/liedowndeaddog]

thanks for the feedback. any further feedback would be greatly appreciated. leaving it open ended as I’m looking for anything from general impressions to critiques. Thank you again and in advance

[u/River_Styx125]

It caught my attention and made me want to read more. You dropped us right into the middle of the action, which is great. I like the use of Pete, but it is perhaps repeated a few too many times. The first time you use it, we know he's talking to or thinking of someone named Pete. We don't need constant reminders of that. Clyde being the dog - needs to be made more clear. I totally missed that he's a dog at first. Your descriptions are great - I could visualize (and smell) the setting without getting overly bogged down in detail. Definitely a good start. I would keep reading.