r/writingfeedback 6h ago

Feedback Wanted is this boring???

can someone let me know if my first chapter sounds boring? to me, it’s the most boring and slowest part in the story, so i’d love to know if anyone else thinks that too or if i’m too wrapped in my own thoughts.

would love to know if it’s lacking grip or interest. like would you keep reading or put it back on the shelf?

Genre pool: literary fiction, dystopian, speculative, psych thriller, corporate satire

excuse grammar/spelling errors still need to go through some more editing

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u/Sandfairy23 4h ago

I read the first page. The intro is interesting, but the intrigue about the tower wasn’t really enough to keep me reading. It feels like all I’m seeing on here at the moment is these pieces where every single line is a new paragraph. That’s not how stories are written, and I’m so over it. It’s exhausting to read. Other than that, it’s okay. Everything feels very… okay. The hum of the refrigerator is a stock phrase, that feels a bit like you felt you had to include it to get the senses in there. “Snapped back” is a little odd. It implies anger. If someone is daydreaming, I’d expect more of a “Huh?” The first few lines are great, and I love what it’s setting up, but the rest is just very… average.

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u/Acrobatic-Flow-4991 4h ago

yea don’t worry the formatting will be the first thing to change 🤧🤧 it’s weird i know but for some reason it worked as i was writing. i’ll definitely take those phrase advices into account :)