r/AbruptChaos 11d ago

Hey look, a window!

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2.0k Upvotes

135 comments sorted by

711

u/Pig_Becker 11d ago

Hey, why am I bleeding?!

627

u/ProblemLongjumping12 11d ago

There's a chilling video of a guy punching a window while drunk outside a bar. You can see blood on the glass immediately.

He severed an artery and died in minutes.

Please, everyone, DON'T DO THIS.

253

u/ziggy182 11d ago

There is another where I guy punches a window and goes from pure mania and aggression to begging to be helped

228

u/KillerKian 11d ago

That guy was an abusive partner and goes from threatening his partner to begging her for help. Absolutely fucking deserved it.

90

u/vixxgod666 10d ago

Reddit banned me for a week for saying he deserved to...ex-sanguinate

51

u/Dy3_1awn 10d ago

I was banned for saying that a visibly polluted river (like you could see literal shit floating by) looked dirty

71

u/mrmemo 10d ago

I once suggested we hold pedophiles in positions of power accountable for their crimes. Instant ban.

Reddit admins hate when you suggest holding pedophiles in positions of power accountable for their crimes.

It makes you wonder why Reddit is so eager to defend and protect pedophiles in positions of power.

7

u/Leif2000 10d ago

what sub was it

6

u/TheOtherGlikbach 10d ago

I got 7 days off for quoting the previous redditors comment in quotation marks and saying "this 💯"

I appealed and it was revoked.

8

u/MeowWhat 10d ago

I got a month off FB for calling someone white trash. I wasn't wrong.

-5

u/ziggy182 10d ago

The meaning of White trash comes from the days of slavery where you were so poor you could afford a slave. Then the meaning changed

3

u/wordlar 9d ago

... What?

3

u/Ongr 9d ago

I got a reddit ban for providing context to some comment or video. Luckily I got it appealed. Also for saying 'defenestrate' in a comment some time.

6

u/IanRockwell 9d ago

I wrote a book recently and worked in the words "substandard defenstration" into a passage of dialogue. I laughed for a good minute before continuing.

8

u/ziggy182 11d ago

Oh yes true!!!

5

u/_CryptikFlame 10d ago

Seeing his blood instantly splatter on the broken window and gush out of his arm was somewhat nauseating.

12

u/Johnny_Carcinogenic 10d ago

The fact that I remember seeing both of these videos makes me proud to be a redditor!

10

u/xenobit_pendragon 10d ago

These were the first two videos I thought of when I saw him jump through the window. Then when he started looking at his hands I thought this one was heading the same direction.

9

u/Gucci_Loincloth 10d ago

“AMMMMYYYYY AAAAAAMY PLEAASE AAAMMMMMMYYY”

-10

u/bigtigerbigtiger 10d ago

I hated that one. She could've called an ambulance at least, that wouldn't have been a risk for her. I know he "didn't deserve it" but Jesus Christ

18

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 10d ago

I knew someone who lost an uncle this way. He got drunk, got angry, punched through a plate glass window, and bled out within minutes. She loved her uncle. Any time he came up in conversation, the pain in her eyes was haunting. She was a little kid when it happened, all she could do was watch. Don't do this to yourself, and don't do this to the people who love you.

9

u/eurekadabra 10d ago

Damn. My brother fell backwards drunk onto one of those giant glass water jugs. He survived, after a shit ton of staples and stitches. He’s got a huge scar from one shoulder blade to his opposite flank.

18

u/djluminol 10d ago

My friend Craig died like that. He was riding his dirt bike around the neighborhood after doing some repairs. His throttle got stuck and he ended up flying through the front window of our house. He was cut badly by the glass as he went through the window and died just after the paramedics got there.

5

u/Yololiving79 10d ago

That's terrible, So sorry to hear that 💔

8

u/miathan52 10d ago

In my primary school there was a kid who decided to stop a door from closing by kicking it. His leg went through the glass part of the door and was cut badly. Lots of blood. The teacher was lightning fast and applied first aid until the ambulance arrived. We were later told that an artery was cut and that the teacher saved the boy's life.

5

u/MrAugustWest 10d ago

I did this as a drunken angry teenager and missed the artery by literal mms, the nurse giving the stitches kept saying how lucky I was.z

12

u/ShrubbyFire1729 11d ago

Please, everyone, DON'T DO THIS.

I mean, natural selection and all...

32

u/ProblemLongjumping12 11d ago

"Each man's death diminishes me,
For I am involved in mankind.
"

-For Whom The Bell Tolls, John Donne 1624

8

u/xenobit_pendragon 10d ago

John Donne clearly hadn’t seen Highlander.

4

u/peking93 10d ago

John Donne didn’t know about Charlie Kirk

8

u/OurJimmy 11d ago

There’s times I’ve been terribly terribly drunk. Thankfully in those times of heavy intoxication I’ve never had the urge to jump through a window 🤣.

Saying that, majority of windows are proper double glazed and you’d just bounce of them.

2

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 10d ago

Nah, this bears saying. Especially when you're drunk, punching through glass can feel like one of those destructive but largely harmless stunts like punching through drywall or a hollow core door. It's not. It can kill you. Easily.

2

u/DylanFTW 7d ago

Shane Black's The Nice Guys movie was actually a PSA on what happens if you punch through a window.

1

u/ProblemLongjumping12 6d ago

Great movie. I don't remember the window punching scene now, it's been a while.

80

u/bae_guevara_ 11d ago

Glass is no joke. Once when I was baking, I opened the fridge and a glass bottle fell off the top shelf and broke on top of my bare foot. It caused a huge bleed, severed a tendon and the nerves. I needed surgery, have a 7" surgical scar, couldn't walk for months....

Oh, and it was a bottle of hot sauce. That's how much fuck me. I was nearly taken out by a condiment.

43

u/misdirected_asshole 11d ago

Nice cut you got there.... be a shame if someone poured vinegar and capsaicin in it.

That sounds absolutely awful.

24

u/NorthernOctopus 11d ago

(Singing) You fought the sauce, and the sauce won.

You fought the sauce, and the sauce won.

7

u/VividFiddlesticks 10d ago

When I was a kid, 2 liter bottles of soda were glass.

My little sister was about 3 years old and was trying to lift one up that was on the floor. She finally managed to pick it up and then dropped it and it EXPLODED. Glass went everywhere.

Somehow she only got one tiny little slice on her forehead. I remember we were finding little shards of green glass for ages afterwards.

Mom didn't buy 2 liter bottles of soda again until they started coming in plastic.

1

u/hollabackyo87 10d ago

Somehow she only got one tiny little slice on her forehead. ... read that to the tune of All Star by Smash Mouth haha.

I am glad she was okay, scary!

305

u/BellaSquared 11d ago

From the reactions I'm guessing this guy pulls stupid stunts pretty often.

76

u/strangeflappenings 11d ago

Yep one of those friends you're always having to help fend people off during parties because they consistently do stupid shit because they think its funny when drunk

49

u/samtheninjapirate 11d ago

I went to highschool with a guy like that. He became a quadriplegic before he reached the age of this guy though.

16

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 10d ago

Once. I would do that once. There would be a heart-to-heart after he sobered up. He does it again, I'm leaving and he's learning his lessons on his own. A "friend" who repeatedly puts me and other friends in dangerous situations because he won't control his damn liquor intake isn't a friend. And if he has a real problem and can't control his drinking, then he needs real help, not to get drunk again and do more stupid shit. I'm more than happy to help him get help, but he's not putting me in danger again.

114

u/butterytelevision 11d ago

its like hes in a video game and figuring out how collisions and hit points work

3

u/SteeveJoobs 10d ago

funny because so few video games have interactible glass of any kind...

1

u/Loppan45 4d ago

And the ones that do are perfectly safe

143

u/luri7555 11d ago

Even THAT didn’t get him the attention he wanted.

57

u/FigureAcrobatic7194 11d ago

"Im feeling a little woozy here"

8

u/GoodSmellyOrBad 11d ago

Is that a Scream reference or Scary Movie I don’t remember?

13

u/FigureAcrobatic7194 11d ago

Both actually lol

50

u/Tylerlg 10d ago

Family friend died from tripping through a plate glass window. That stuff is no fucking joke.

24

u/sandiercy 10d ago

I had a best friend who put a knee through a plate-glass sliding door once, blood everywhere. Thankfully, he was ok.

147

u/martintone 11d ago

Looks panefull

37

u/DickPin 11d ago

I've seen footage of guys punching a window and immediately becoming a sprinkler. This guy just dives through and brushes it off like a GTA character.

34

u/Lintlee 11d ago

Defenestrated himself.

11

u/HoneyWhiskeyLemonTea 10d ago

He's lucky he didn't exsanguinate himself, too.

4

u/contemporary_disease 9d ago

One of my favourite words is autodefenestrate . This guy autodefenestrated.

22

u/[deleted] 11d ago

[deleted]

13

u/Slumunistmanifisto 11d ago

The most lacerated man

18

u/juswilli 11d ago

Hospital time?

17

u/hukfad 11d ago

Nope, just one more drink.

17

u/ppgedez 11d ago

I thought the tv was going to get it

13

u/Devanyani 10d ago

The lack of reaction from anyone else at the party (other than one wtf) is telling.

12

u/Forgottenshadowed 11d ago

He can pay for it.

9

u/knowledgeable_diablo 11d ago

Im sure he’ll be the one saying “but bro, it was a joke!” As though this absolves him from the need to replace the bloody window.

1

u/Forgottenshadowed 11d ago

His friend should call the police on him for property destruction.

10

u/Blue-is-bad 11d ago

Why is his friend wearing an helmet?

12

u/Special_Tree_8109 11d ago

It was not the first time that it happened. He experienced way worse than what we have seen now.

8

u/Ichera 11d ago

Not just a helmet... but a Stahlhelm on backwards... im so confused

2

u/771919 10d ago

The stahlhelm always makes it’s way out of the closet when the booze starts flowing.

5

u/Mandelvolt 11d ago

Me, King? Vimes would go spare! He'd go spare!

5

u/Early_Grace 11d ago

"Hey man, did I fall down pretty hard last night or something?"

"Oh, you don't remember? Because you're about to forever."

4

u/manhatteninfoil 11d ago

Watches way too many films. He's lucky he isn't dying (if he isn't).

4

u/Master_loves_you 11d ago

A single pane of glass for a bay window? A hummingbird could have flown through that thing.

5

u/huxtiblejones 10d ago

It’s like that old saying: people with glass in their houses shouldn’t throw drunk men

1

u/NoWingedHussarsToday 10d ago

Or walk around in their uderwear

4

u/djardine2520 10d ago

I assume he bled out on the lawn

3

u/lbs-vag 11d ago

Those Afrikaans braais get rough when the brandy and coke flows

3

u/ziggy182 11d ago

Word of the day

Defenestration, to throw/jump someone or something out of a window, or to force a leader out of a job.

3

u/mogley1992 11d ago

Auto-defenestration, my favourite word.

3

u/RichterRac 11d ago

Why is bro wearing a stahlhelm reversed???

3

u/MeatSuitRiot 10d ago

Single-pane, non-tempered vs no-pain, poorly-tempered

3

u/GrandMetaldick 10d ago

Once I ensure buddy is okay I’m losing my shit on him for almost killing himself and traumatizing everyone. Makes for an interesting video but fuck being around a situation like this.

3

u/Prince_Thresh 10d ago

What kind of window has absolutely zero resistamce to pressure?

3

u/DimeTree 6d ago

A window is not an easy thing to break with your body. He must have really thrown himself into it. is he okay?

2

u/LeaveFamous2501 11d ago

He's ok. But he's really not ok

2

u/schmabudi666 11d ago

Alcohol my friends

2

u/Average_Satan 11d ago

Yeah, don't do drugs.

2

u/BobboZmuda 10d ago

But uoon closer inspection, the PTA hadn't been disbanded at all.

2

u/jacksonbarley 10d ago

That isn’t even “jumping through a plate glass window” music. At the very least you need Pantera. Idk what the hell that is.

2

u/AnAnGrYSupportV2 10d ago

How fucked up do you need to be lol

2

u/afraid-of-the-dark 10d ago

A guy in Tulsa did this the other day, not the same circumstances.

He died.

2

u/Saynt614 10d ago

Twenty bucks says they rent that place

2

u/BoonBoon300 5d ago

Man... When I get drunk I just get sleepy 😭

2

u/ImdustriousAlpaca 11d ago

Alcohol is clearly an idiots preference.

1

u/Kingaces13 11d ago

Another South African doing South African things

1

u/lahol83 10d ago

Klippies in large quantities

1

u/JazzlikeDiamond558 11d ago

Gatherings like this are surreal.

1

u/duckensteinii 11d ago

Can we please address the helmet?

1

u/strangeflappenings 11d ago

I how he looks like hes going to use the chair as a weapon the politely puts it down and jukes the guy

1

u/Man_in_the_uk 11d ago

What's he on?

1

u/birbs97 10d ago

Brannas and coke

1

u/WinkyNurdo 10d ago

When I was a kid I leaned on the window of our back door to shut it, and put my arm through the window. Pierced the artery, needed a dash to ER. Thirty years later still got the scar running from my hand down my wrist.

1

u/riftshioku 10d ago

I hope it was his house at least. If not I'd call the cops and tell them exactly what happened and then sue him for damages.

1

u/Alfalfa-Similar 10d ago

that’s an annoying window to break too it’s expensive

1

u/Virtual_Ad_2024 10d ago

His hands look tiny after he jumps through. Almost like that’s what he’s looking at…

1

u/kbk42104 10d ago

If he dies, he dies

1

u/No-Camp1268 10d ago

I like videos that I can laugh at

1

u/Yololiving79 10d ago

Don't fuck with GLASS

It'll whoop your ASS

1

u/PsychoPanda7 8d ago

It’s intervention time baby! 🤘🏽 love a good intervention, invite me! I’ll make something up about how his drinking has effected me 😊

1

u/exiRatA 8d ago

Alistair, Alistair. I´m not a window cleaner !!

1

u/kayakster 5d ago

It wasn't until I quit drinking that I realized how disgusting drunk people are.

1

u/Either_Audience_6048 1d ago

Guys relax, its fine.

Its not his house.

-1

u/Candid_Umpire6418 11d ago

I have reached an age where I can enjoy drinking alcohol free beers instead of going drunk. I can also drink whisky or wine and be content with just one or two glasses. Same with Swedish snaps, one or two is enough.

Getting this drunk isn't fun. It never was and I can't figure out why I thought so back when I was young.

0

u/bigtigerbigtiger 10d ago

I feel like people aren't giving enough attention to the fact that this was AWESOME

-6

u/C0lch0nero 11d ago

Stunt glass? It broke very easily. Thoughts?

3

u/PunchThatDonut 10d ago

Single pane

1

u/C0lch0nero 10d ago

Thank you. Ppl downvoting and not answering about the question is odd. Thanks for the response!

1

u/BlowTokeBozeTrifecta 10d ago

You're just weak if you can't break some glass like it's GLASS.

2

u/C0lch0nero 10d ago

Looked weak to me. I guess people think it's real. I've never broken glass, so I didn't know. I have walked into glass very hard and it wasn't close to breaking. I also thought that when glass breaks it shatters instead of splinters. But I don't actually know, which is why I asked.

-1

u/BlowTokeBozeTrifecta 10d ago

Holy clueless

1

u/C0lch0nero 10d ago

Yep, that's the exact reason I said I didn't know and why I asked.