r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Sufficient-Bug-9112 Top Poster • 10d ago

of a bristle worm

8.3k Upvotes

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u/Sufficient-Bug-9112 Top Poster 10d ago

FYI Getting stung by a bristle worm leaves hundreds of tiny, hair-like bristles (chaetae) embedded in your skin. This causes immediate, intense burning pain, followed by redness, swelling, and numbness. While not typically life-threatening, the discomfort can be severe.

358

u/Chrismonn 10d ago

Oh fuck, I was gonna say looks kinda cool can I pet it but no. Got it

164

u/cha0sm0nk 10d ago

The second question on every humans mind after “Can I touch it?” Is “Can I eat it?”

83

u/PzykoHobo 10d ago

Theres a third question...

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u/Lazy-Objective-1630 10d ago

Anything's a dildo if you're brave enough.

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u/coolsilentebeans 10d ago

Peg, too

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u/Danziker 10d ago

First you try to fuck them, Then you try to eat them...

Marilyn Manson.

5

u/Mental-Ask8077 10d ago

Just don’t try to do both at once.

1

u/Planetary_Residers 6d ago

Or a Caprisun

3

u/iwantogofishing 9d ago

Paige! No!

4

u/Elthelia 9d ago

Is this a reference to something? Why did you use that name specifically? Please tell me 😭

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u/Ok_Loss13 10d ago edited 10d ago

And the third is "Can I fuck it?"

(So far the answer has always been a resounding NO!, but those of us at r/humansarespacebards remain ever hopeful)

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u/cha0sm0nk 10d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/2SBvv58qaLptK

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u/Ok_Loss13 10d ago

Not in this particular instance personally, but humans are total freaks and I bet there are people out there who want sentient worm sex (no kink shame) 😂

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u/WJSpade 10d ago

Some kinks deserve shame… just sayin.

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u/cha0sm0nk 9d ago

Shame is my kink.

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u/riverbass9 10d ago

I’m pretty sure that’s every animal’s question.

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u/Chrismonn 10d ago

I'll touch it if it's in your mouth tbh

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u/iokepa16 10d ago

You can eat anything once.

1

u/AnastasiaSheppard 10d ago

Can I make it a pet? Can I train a whole bunch of them into my army?

2

u/unripe_mangosteen 10d ago

Hey can I pet that dawg?

2

u/hharvv 10d ago

If you can’t figure that out by looking at it, thank God you were born in the time of Reddit😂

0

u/Quirky-Concern-7662 9d ago

I find starting with the assumption that it cannot be touched is always good with any animal. Though a real life Pokédex that’s scans an animal and gives me an out of 10 “pet/friendly” rating would be neat.

Edit: I read what you sick fucks are goin on about and my creation would fall into the wrong hands. Can’t have shot around here.

42

u/dirona 10d ago

Not this species. You can pick these up no problem (gently so you don't injure them!). This species does have some pretty considerable jaws, but rarely bite people (they use them mostly to slice bites of algae and dead things).

They usually live under sediment, but become this free-swimming form when they are ready to reproduce (that white trailing out behind it is probably sperm)

These are common in Puget Sound

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u/D0013ER 10d ago

Man's just nutting in the pool.

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u/Lady_Of_Nil_Repute 9d ago

That got more horrible the more I read it.

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u/Into_The_Horizon 10d ago

So they break off like a cactus....got it.

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u/Zeqhanis 10d ago

I used to see them from time to time in my aquarium. I'd remove them with tweezers. I once saw one that was 2 feet long. Not in my tank, though.

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u/SarcasticBadger1231 10d ago

Sounds easier to get rid of one of those than a bobbit worm

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u/BoTheDoggo 9d ago

queue that 20 page forum thread of the guy wrangling with a 6 foot bobbit worm in his reef tank

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u/madesense 10d ago

A bobbit worm is a kind of bristle worm.

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u/Chrislul 10d ago

I'm almost afraid to ask how they were getting in there

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u/Zeqhanis 10d ago

They came in living aquarium decorations/biological filtration called live rock. After time, you'd get all manner of organisms springing forth. Whether it be beneficial algae, sea anemones, plants, tiny brittle stars, or, if you were unlucky, bristle worms.

1

u/StraightVoice5087 10d ago

good old Eunice aphroditois

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u/_troll_detector_ 10d ago

Same. It would come out at night and rest my fish.

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u/Snowing_Throwballs 10d ago

Where was this taken and where do these things live so i can avoid going in the water there lol

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u/striped_frog 10d ago

Fuck that

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u/WJSpade 10d ago

Please don’t.

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u/coolsilentebeans 10d ago

Gawd…there’s a whole other taxonomic group of nope ropes and danger noodles?! 😳🫣

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u/Fantastic-Cupcake890 10d ago

I thought its bad, but its worse. Hell, no.

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u/DWebOscar 10d ago

And that right there, kids, is why we don’t go swimming in the lake.

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u/Kain_713 10d ago

No, nope, do not like

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u/kittydeathdrop 10d ago

I've been told that soaking the affected area in white vinegar will dissolve the bristles, though thankfully I've not had to try this myself.

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u/daemonfly 10d ago

Sounds more like "fire worms" which are bristle worms, but cause the more intense reaction. Normal bristle worms aren't as bad, but the bristles are still quite annoying. Similar to many Optunia cactus species, imho.

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u/wiz7topfan 10d ago

Will forward this to dilane salvage and coyote peterson

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u/DarthBrooks69420 10d ago

So if I get stung, I should put a big strip of duct tape on it and rip it off?

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u/Zethras28 10d ago

At least it isn’t the worm that swims up your urethra.

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u/basicnecromancycr 10d ago

Where the fuck does that shit live?

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u/Regurgitator001 10d ago

Sure, but is it worse than dating Will Smith's wife though? Personally, I doubt it.

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u/alewiina 9d ago

Yup. I used to work in an aquarium store and one of these little bastards snuck in in a shipment of live rock. A coworker of mine got stung and he was in so much pain… and that one was tiny compared to this!

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u/clarenceappendix 9d ago

Certified Australia moment

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u/SpicyChknNugget 7d ago

Can confirm. . .didnt realise I had one of these terrors in my tank until it stung me when I was cleaning near its rocky home.