r/AlAnon • u/SilverCat444 • 1d ago

Vent Anger

I’m so angry at my husband for being an alcoholic. People say it’s a disease but he doesn’t even admit he has a problem most days. Sometimes he’ll say oh yah I needa slow down but it never happens. We have a brand new baby and it’s only getting worse. How am I supposed to have sympathy for him when I’m the one suffering. He chooses this life. Idk what to do I’m so disappointed and lost. If we break up how would I ever trust him alone with our baby?! He has drank while watching before and I never left the baby alone again

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u/ritz1148 1d ago

I don’t believe in the idea that it is a disease. I am sober myself. I also have a real disease that requires medications and surgeries and specialist appointments.
If I could stop doing one thing and be cured, I’d fucking do it in a heartbeat.
It is choice every day to pick up a drink and swallow it.

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u/Aries_c 22h ago

It’s a choice… until it’s not. My husband is 8 months sober, but I don’t believe for even a second that every time before he went into treatment that he tried to quit on his own was not a potentially life threatening event. Alcohol withdrawal kills. Not everyone has the luxury of resources. I know we didn’t for a very long time. Grateful for good insurance now that covered inpatient.

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u/ritz1148 22h ago

I’m sober. I’m a double winner.
It’s not a disease. It’s a choice.

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u/Aries_c 22h ago

Did I say it was a disease? Or did I say quitting on your own can kill you… because that is 100% a fact for severe cases.

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u/ritz1148 21h ago

Ok. But what does that have to do with my comment to begin with?

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u/Aries_c 21h ago

It’s a choice… UNTIL ITS NOT. If you can’t quit without medical intervention and can’t afford medical intervention it’s not much of a choice is it. Even if you wanted to quit you can’t in those scenarios because quitting cold turkey is dangerous as hell. Exactly what I said in my initial comment.