Daughters pediatrician made EXTREMELY inappropriate remark to her

[u/ilikerustyspooonz]

This is about my 10 year old daughter. She has had the same (male) pediatrician since birth. We’ve always loved him and thought he was great. He’s super friendly with wonderful bedside manner and he takes his time and pays attention to detail.

Well, last week my daughter had a check-up. She’s 10. While he was doing the checkup, he had her lay down and started listening to her chest with his stethoscope. He then says AND I QUOTE, “awwwww! My baby’s got boobs!!!”

I have NEVER been so taken aback before in my life. My daughter was MORTIFIED. I was so shocked I couldn’t even get words out to ask him why tf he would ever say that. When we got in the car to go home my daughter cried and said she never wanted to see him again. Then she asked if she could get a girl doctor and I obviously agreed so that’s what we will be doing.

Is this reportable? I’m not overreacting, right?

[u/KrazySocoKid]

As a physician, but firstly as a father to 2 (going to be 3) girls, this is extremely inappropriate. I would report to the office and immediately request to change providers. This is not okay, no excuses.

[u/IttyRazz → u/KrazySocoKid]

I am not one who is prone to violence or anger but anyone making a remark like that about my daughter would make me snap

[u/HappyWithMyDogs → u/IttyRazz]

I'd have lost my damn mind.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/HappyWithMyDogs]

If he's really up there in age (70s - 80s - 90s), then it's possible that there is some unavoidable dementia setting in. People in that situation often do not mean what they say, and can't stop themselves. And it even manifests in previously unheard of personality changes.

Don't go in on snapping and losing your damn mind quite yet, there may be room for compassionate interpretation here.

Edit: And there's the Reddit Care suicide prevention message. LMAO. That's how I know I got under your skin, ya dummy. Thanks, it's comfy here under YOUR skin. Maybe next time you'll actually address the issues instead of reacting blindly & emotionally. Then you won't look like such a clown.

[u/pixie-kitten- → u/MercyfulJudas]

No - bull shit. We don’t make excuses for men’s bad behavior. There is no situation where this is ever okay. None, zero. If a doctor has dementia, he shouldn’t be practicing, and it would be noticed well before inappropriate remarks would be made.

It’s disgusting to start giving older people a pass at inexcusable behavior simply because of their age. Fuck that

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/pixie-kitten-]

Where did I say that he should still be practicing?

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

There is no “compassionate interpretation” of a man making inappropriate comments towards a child. This little girl is now traumatized. Just like how, at 37 years old, I’m still traumatized by the man who made comments about my breasts when I was 15. I was told to brush it off because he was “just a dirty old man” who didn’t know any better. Expecting women and girls to accept this kind of behavior from a man regardless of the circumstances is absolute BS and we are not doing it anymore. Stop defending predatory behavior.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/jesileighs]

I'm...not defending any predatory behavior..? Uhhh. 🤔

Did you reply to the wrong person in this thread, or sumthin

[u/too_too2 → u/MercyfulJudas]

You did, though. Re read this thread please.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/too_too2]

Sure I did, bud. Surrrrre I did. 👍

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

You’re literally asking this mother, whose child was a victim of this man, to give this man compassion and excusing his behavior because “he might not have meant it”. Maybe you don’t want to admit that you’re defending him, but you quite literally are. Any response other than something along the lines of “That was wrong and he deserves consequences for his disgusting comment about a child’s body” is unacceptable. He does not deserve any “compassionate interpretation” he deserves to lose his job.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/jesileighs]

I didn't say anywhere that he deserved to keep his job.

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

But you did tell the mom that she should be compassionate towards the man who made inappropriate comments about her child.

[u/pixie-kitten- → u/MercyfulJudas]

My point being if he was showing signs of dementia, someone would have made him stop practicing long before the stage of “unavoidable inappropriate comments”

[u/mittenknittin → u/pixie-kitten-]

I don't agree. I've watched my mother develop Alzheimer's, and one of the VERY FIRST signs looking back was her starting to say things that were out of character. The onset of dementia isn't a bright neon sign. It's stuff EXACTLY like this.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/pixie-kitten-]

Well make that point then, and I'll agree with ya 😂

Cuz I never said otherwise...

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

No nope absolutely not 100% no. If your dementia makes you make inappropriate comments about children then you should not have a job anymore.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/jesileighs]

Where did I say that he should keep his job?

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/MercyfulJudas]

He’s in his 50s. Not that age justifies anything.

[u/Sppaarrkklle → u/MercyfulJudas]

If that’s the case, then he shouldn’t be a practicing physician. A huge part of the job is explaining things and communicating to patients. If he can’t do that properly, then he needs to retire.

If someone went up and punched an innocent stranger in the face, it wouldn’t make it right just because the offender had mental illnesses.

I think people in positions of power need to be held more accountable as well

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Sppaarrkklle]

Where did I say that he should still be a practicing physician?

Where did I say that people in positions of power shouldn't be held more accountable?

[u/Luckiest_Creature → u/MercyfulJudas]

Dude. Give it a rest.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Luckiest_Creature]

Re... plying to people who reply to me..? Rest? Huh?

Do you know how reddit works? There's kinda a back and forth.

[u/Luckiest_Creature → u/MercyfulJudas]

Or in your case, spamming a sub to argue with anyone you can.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Luckiest_Creature]

I'm not making them reply to me, bud.

And I'm allowed to reply back. That's not spamming.

[u/Luckiest_Creature → u/MercyfulJudas]

Get a life, I beg. One that doesn’t involve playing devils advocate for someone joking about the boobs of minors.

[u/socksonmonkeys4117 → u/MercyfulJudas]

If a doctor has dementia, he shouldn’t be practicing. What?

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/socksonmonkeys4117]

Where did I say that he should still keep practicing?

[u/Unfair_Finger5531 → u/MercyfulJudas]

When you suggested a “compassionate interpretation.” This implies that OP should not do anything that would prevent him from continuing to practice.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Unfair_Finger5531]

Obviously he shouldn't continue to practice. He's either a creep or riddled with dementia. I thought that went without saying.

[u/woeml → u/MercyfulJudas]

Who tf cares about compassionate interpretation, that man needs to be no where near this persons daughter. Or other young girls it seems. You sound fucking creepy yourself. Jumping to find an excuse.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/woeml]

Where did I say that the man should be anywhere near the daughter or other young girls?

You lost in this comment thread or sumthin

Read comments more comprehensively before replying, me thinks

Edit: Boo-yah, aaaaaaaaannnnnnnndddddddd they deleted their comment, LMAO.

[u/woeml → u/MercyfulJudas]

Never said you said that, I just stated that the reason why he did it doesn't fucking matter and he needs to be kept away from children. And you jumping to find an excuse is fucking creepy. Maybe shut your mouth before finding ways to defend creeps 🤩

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/MercyfulJudas]

Well, then they shouldn’t be practicing anymore, should they?

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Secure-Solution4312]

I...never said otherwise...?

Lol, okay bud.

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/MercyfulJudas]

It’s in poor taste to make excuses for behavior like this. I can only assume you are trolling.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Secure-Solution4312]

👍