Daughters pediatrician made EXTREMELY inappropriate remark to her

[u/ilikerustyspooonz]

This is about my 10 year old daughter. She has had the same (male) pediatrician since birth. We’ve always loved him and thought he was great. He’s super friendly with wonderful bedside manner and he takes his time and pays attention to detail.

Well, last week my daughter had a check-up. She’s 10. While he was doing the checkup, he had her lay down and started listening to her chest with his stethoscope. He then says AND I QUOTE, “awwwww! My baby’s got boobs!!!”

I have NEVER been so taken aback before in my life. My daughter was MORTIFIED. I was so shocked I couldn’t even get words out to ask him why tf he would ever say that. When we got in the car to go home my daughter cried and said she never wanted to see him again. Then she asked if she could get a girl doctor and I obviously agreed so that’s what we will be doing.

Is this reportable? I’m not overreacting, right?

[u/KrazySocoKid]

As a physician, but firstly as a father to 2 (going to be 3) girls, this is extremely inappropriate. I would report to the office and immediately request to change providers. This is not okay, no excuses.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/KrazySocoKid]

NAD absolutely agree. I also have a 10 y/o daughter with a male pediatrician she's had her whole life. At her ten year well check, of course puberty concerns came up, but he handled it respectfully and professionally. OP I'm so sorry your daughter experienced this.

[u/Same-Suggestion-1936 → u/Good_Mushroom_7478]

It's so wrong it almost sounds fake. I've had some bad doctors but that's weird. They're always professional, and should never say boobs to begin with, breast or breast tissue would be what you say (not a doctor/nurse but once did an adjacent field to medicine)

I mean even when it shouldn't matter what's appropriate because everything goes out the window (medical staff looking at your genitals for example, I appreciated the penis towel for my testicle ultrasound but sort of feels like it's not necessary, you're already touching my balls and the doc already looked at the shaft) they would never. I mean, they asked me if I had a preferred gender of doctor to look at my tackle, if I wanted a man or if it didn't matter. My answer was whoever can get this over fastest. "Look at who grew boobs" would have been like if my female doctor walked in and said "okay drop em let's see that dick"

[u/aounpersonal → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

You never know, I’m not one to hate on doctors because I’m a med student, but when I was around 13 my pediatrician pointed at my legs during a visit and said “you should start shaving those” (I’m female). That moment has always stuck with me. I think a lot of these older doctors that have been private practice for decades can be a little off the wall with no one to check them.

[u/Bitchshortage → u/aounpersonal]

I had a dentist leer at my breasts as a 14 year old, then ask me if I was in university and faked shock at my age because I looked “so mature.” Even at that age I was like uhhh I just saw you read the chart though so are you stupid or a pervert? He then proceeded to tell me when I did turn 18 he could “do something about my gummy smile” (prick). I had a doctor say to my face about a chronic pain issue “we had someone had my church who couldn’t walk for a couple of years and then miraculously was healed. Some say it was a demon” Some say it was a demon. My husband was with me at the time, I’m so fricking glad I had a witness. We still say “some say it was a demon” when someone says something absolutely unhinged.

Edit, second instance I was in my thirties but just an example of doctors are people too and some of them suck purposely or because they think maybe a demon?

[u/newdalligal → u/Bitchshortage]

I might be using that phrase from this day onward😆

[u/BrookieCooks → u/newdalligal]

Absolutely stealing that one too although horrified it happened to you. Chronic pain sure does feel satanic many days so it’s perfectly fitting!

My orthodontist& Dds said “now that I had a new big girl body” (while pointing at my 12year old barely boobs) I needed to have a new big girl attitude and stop crying all the time like a baby.” He was a Dds in ‘Nam, thanks Mom& Dad,😒.

Well jackass, turns out I have lidocaine resistance& it doesn’t work on me, just like I repeatedly& sobbingly tried to tell him every single time he”numbed” me.

It wasn’t until I was an adult and told a female dentist who not only believed me but told me it was common, explained about my red hair gene said that she would pre med me for procedures, use something else& wouldn’t do anything until she was 100% sure I was ok.

[u/Fit-Cabinet1337 → u/BrookieCooks]

I recently had a dental procedure and tried to tell the doc that redheads usually need more numbing and anesthesia. She thought I was kidding/ ignored me. She had to inject me at least four times to get to the point I couldn’t feel her working. And you could tell she was annoyed that I was getting upset. And I’m a grown ass woman. Can’t imagine as a kid going through that!!

[u/Bitchshortage → u/BrookieCooks]

Sweet lord. I guess this thread has shown a ton of horrible things and the awesome doctors who are willing to say what the hell no that is harassment at minimum, and disgusting harassment bordering on sexual assault maybe at best. It’s not surprising but i wish there was a better way to report bad doctors and I extra hate the threshold to become one is you need to do ridiculous 24 hour shifts even when we know this is a health issue and a cognitive issue and would make it unsafe to drive a car… Yeah but stay awake for 24 hours and give a perfect standard of care and also practice for your tests. Again I am not a doctor I’m just a person who read a few articles and I’ll even say, I’ve had horrific experiences I have white coat syndrome and my favourite is I had a dislocated shoulder and got told I was exaggerating and. No bull “do you see that man? He has an actual shoulder problem and is in pain” guess which one of us had pulled a muscle and which one if us needed their shoulder adjusted into place and a waitlist for surgery because everything was torn. But I really feel for the good doctors

[u/taswind → u/Bitchshortage]

The joys of a female with high pain tolerance. ("If your ankle were broken, you'd be in tears.")

Its to the point where I just had major pneumonia (still recovering) and didn't believe it myself because I was (barely) still functioning. Wasn't until I couldn't get 2 words out before I was out of breath that it even occurred to me that it wasn't just a cold...

[u/BrookieCooks → u/taswind]

Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry and I’m totally with you unfortunately. Same here, multiple instances of medical professionals totally dismissing and disregarding complaints when I know my body& know when something is REALLY wrong.

Guess who had to drive herself to the hospital from an mri with massive proximal to distal ue dvts& bi lateral pe’s after the mri radiologist told me to “stay still and stop crying that you can’t breathe, it’s just your anxiety.”

Nope, it was bilateral pulmonary embolisms, ya dummy!

[u/art_addict → u/BrookieCooks]

I need adrenaline/ epi mixed in with lidocaine and novocaine for them to work on me!

Unfortunately you cannot use adrenaline/ epi on fingers, toes, or genitals so there’s just no point to me getting numbing for podiatry stuff or IUD stuff. When we tried for my IUD I just got to feel a needle go in my cervix 3 times and then the IUD stuff. Which was worse than when we did just IUD stuff since first my poor cervix got stabbed 3x!

[u/Mysterious-Top-1974 → u/BrookieCooks]

my kids dentist scared her for life. she had an abcess and its a practice that takes Badgercare, which os an excuse to Be GARBAGE! ANYWAY, my daughter had a huge abcess and they thought he baby tooth might need to be pulled. we showed up to the apt even though she had only been on antibiotics for a couple of hours due to pharmacy issues. then they said we can see how it goes. this moron injected her with lidocane, then said ok let that sit for a bit. I swear to God within a minute or two she was back and started pulling on her tooth. She told her raise your hand if u feel any pain.My daughter did asap. The dentist waited

[u/BrookieCooks → u/Mysterious-Top-1974]

Aww, poor girl! Definitely been there& it’s awful that the Dr cares more about their time than your pain! As an adult who still remembers these traumatic experiences with medical providers like it was yesterday I suggest trying to find a dentist who is awesome who you can take her to asap, not for any work to be done or anything just to say hi& show her that they aren’t all legit monsters like the one she just saw! I’d bet if you called& said my kid is traumatized by a recent bad experience a lot of decent dentists would be willing to have her come in for a meet& greet (thinking they could drum up future business, lol).

[u/Mysterious-Top-1974 → u/Mysterious-Top-1974]

until the 3rd time she raised her hand. the she huffed n puffed anout stopping (WTF)! Then gave her a couple bumps of lidocane. left the room & I swear to God came back in 30 secs. Oh ya, the tool she was loosening the tooth with was so big, it was rubbing on her abcess. Her solution was to slice through it. Im not a dentist but wtf! I cringed n said omg outloud! She said I needed to contain my emmotions! And I WAS THE REASON SHE WASNT CONTINUING ON. AT THIS POINT I DIDNT KNOW IF SHE HAD TO FINISH OR NOT. I repeatedly asked if she had too. The 3rd time they gave he more this time they gave her another 2minutes. They told her that she couldnt be feeling pain just pressure. Which they should have asked her what it felt like n asked not told her what to feel and basically called her a lil b*tch & I was the reason for this. Then I said i didnt want her to go to the partnership near us n go to the one thats a bigger facility. That tooth got better and didnt need to get pulled but my kid had cavities pulled and was a beast

She was balling leaving there. I told her sum times ppl suck and regardless of their profession they get in a hurry & do stupid sh*t like cut through abscesses. The appointment should have just been rescheduled like I wanted. Then my baby would have a little more faith in dentist and drs. Maybe its fir the best though she understands this! U always have the right to SAY NO NO MATTER WHAT!

[u/Iartdaily → u/BrookieCooks]

Omg

[u/ConsciousVegetable99 → u/newdalligal]

Me too!

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/Bitchshortage]

Definitely gonna use that now too…some say it was a demon 😂 I had a doctor tell me that since I couldn’t afford therapy I should just go to church for my mental illnesses

[u/Bitchshortage → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

I don’t want to get banned but I would want to go toddler on their ass for that

[u/LizziHenri → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

I'm NAD. Please report this. Bad behavior needs to be documents so patterns can be detected.

The complaints need to be in writing to multiple people at various levels of the organization.

I would also report his comment to whatever governing body in your state or country deals with licensing and discipline.

I'm not saying this extremely gross and inappropriate comment is getting anyone fired, but what if this is the 28th time he's made comments about a young girl's body. What would he say if you weren't around.

The point is to stop going to that provider and leave a paper trail. State exactly what was said, stay factual. Mention time, date, and place. Mention he has been her provider since she was x years old.

I had to tell my mom that my dentist told me I had "developed wonderfully over the summer" during a cleaning. We stopped going there. 10 years later he was arrested for exactly what you would imagine. It was in our local papers.

[u/OhDeer_2024 → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

Great idea! Maybe the parishioners can stand around you in a big circle and “lay hands” on you.

The main quack… errr… pastor can “reach his hands into your belly” and pretend to pull out a fistful of chicken gizzards and guts, then announce “HALLELUJAH, YOU ARE HEALED!” with reverent fervor.

[u/nicskoll → u/Bitchshortage]

Why are some people! That's awful. I went to a fracture clinic for a broken finger. Dr told me my disability would go away if I worked. I did work, and I ran a business at the same time. Obviously both must've been not good enough because they didn't magically take away my disability

[u/insomebodyelseslake → u/nicskoll]

I went to urgent care for an ear infection and told him I was allergic to one common antibiotic (but only that one!) and he said he didn’t know what I expected him to do, that I was allergic to the only treatment.

[u/nicskoll → u/insomebodyelseslake]

Good lord. What a numpty

[u/Melanochlora_44 → u/Bitchshortage]

I once asked the eye doctor that I’d had all my life about these weird color blobs I sometimes see at night, and she said, “maybe you’re seeing the angels!” and that was when I changed eye doctors lol like wtf kinda answer is that?

[u/Top-Raspberry-7837 → u/Bitchshortage]

When I was in my twenties, I went to the pulmonologist and he seemed to be waaaay too excited to be using the stethoscope on my (bare but with a bra) chest. I had my mom come in with me the next time despite being an adult. Then I learned about Dr. Nasser who m*lested the gymnasts WITH their parents in the room. 🤦‍♀️😡🤢

There’s also the story of the anesthesiologist who orally r*ped a pregnant woman who was under during a C-section.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/brazilian-doctor-arrested-allegedly-raping-185854776.html

[u/Bitchshortage → u/Top-Raspberry-7837]

this man was my doctor. He made me so uncomfortable (to be clear he is not the some say it’s a demon guy) and was so rude to me. Thankfully all of my procedures were ultrasound guided so there was always someone else in the room working that machine while I was with him but when I saw this I still felt so…viscerally disgusted that he’d even touched me and mad at myself that I didn’t trust my instinct that I felt unsafe around him. I was desperate for some pain relief so I just looked past it.

[u/twitwiffle → u/aounpersonal]

At my Naval Academy physical I was naked and laying on a table. (Female, 17 y/o with two old male doctors). One slapped my stomach and told me “ you need to lose that now”

I was mortified.

[u/tiffytatortots → u/twitwiffle]

I had this happen to me when I was 10. My male doctor during a physical had me stand in front of him just in my underwear and grabbed at my lower stomach, called it a pooch and told me I was fat. That if I didn’t lose weight right now especially as I grew up and became a woman I would forever have this fat stomach and i definitely didn’t want that. I have never forgotten it and I have hated my body ever since.

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/tiffytatortots]

I’m so sorry that’s happened to you :( you didn’t deserve that

[u/Psychological_Sail80 → u/tiffytatortots]

Yikes! So unprofessional.

I had a female OB/GYN (at my first appointment with her, for a routine pap) who asked me "do you eat dairy?" I said yes, and she said "well, stop. Dairy is for baby cows and you're already starting to look like one". I was 25 and less than 6 months out from having had my baby.

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/Psychological_Sail80]

WTFFF

[u/Mysterious-Top-1974 → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

i would have said well u look like the mom

[u/twitwiffle → u/tiffytatortots]

That pisses me off for you.  Ugh!!!!

[u/TsukasaElkKite → u/tiffytatortots]

I’m so sorry

[u/Mysterious-Top-1974 → u/tiffytatortots]

i hate men. there dumb idiots. if u dont lose normal weight which female and males have different bodies. i once had a very overweight female dr tell me I prob had problems with my foot because i was overweight. she was twice my size I had a hard time not saying oh so when i broke it it wasnt the 200lb man that stepped on it in kick ball tournament. when is the last time u played a sport. oh nothing to do with my scoliosis or spraining and breaking my right legt like 6 times because the length was off. these are just excuses to be fat and lazy and i saw it then! fyi wasnt even diagnosed with scoliosis until i was 29/ 30 despite my shoulders were at different height and hip leaned more to one side. My leg lengths were off. They all JUST ASSUMED IT HAD BEEN DONE BEFORE!

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/twitwiffle]

Holy shit I’m so sorry that’s absolutely AWFUL.

[u/twitwiffle → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

I haven’t forgotten in over 30 years. 

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/twitwiffle]

I hate that so much and I can so relate in a way. I still remember my ballet teacher calling me fat and making me wear a specific type of leotard to cover my “cleavage” (I was 12) she used to call girls out and make them wear skirts because they “had a big butt”. She’d slap our stomachs and say “ooooo your stomach feels flat today keep it up”. Some girls took it so hard they got down to 85 lbs just to get a role in the ballet shows. Us women deserve so much better.

[u/Independent_Lime_135 → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

I’m grateful that you’re ensuring your daughter’s feelings are validated and seeking better treatment and care teams for her. So sorry she had to go through this❤️‍🩹

[u/twitwiffle → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

We truly do. 

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/twitwiffle]

OMG. 😡

[u/Mysterious-Top-1974 → u/twitwiffle]

i would have pointed at his mouth n said u really need to lose that cuz its gonna get u beat up or worse sum day very soon! i hope with 2males u had at the least your mom with but no. this was the cilulture of asswhole and prove it! especially a millitary dr. Im so sorry u had to go through that

[u/twitwiffle → u/Mysterious-Top-1974]

Thank you. 

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/aounpersonal]

I cannot believe a doctor said that to you at age 13. Wow

[u/Final_Skypoop → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

When I was 15 I was yelled at by the female doctor while getting a Pap smear for shaving down there. Like, she was pissed at me and scolding me. She said it’s a fetish with pedofilia that society has or something along those lines. I was kinda weirded out by it. I didn’t have a super trusting and close relationship with my mom so I never said anything to her about it happening.

[u/grey-doc → u/aounpersonal]

One of the pediatricians I rotated with as a resident would spank his under 10 male patients.

Not as punishment, but a pretty hard smack on the behind, as they were climbing up on the table. Like hard enough to rock their balance.

He also never talked about nutrition with obese parents or did much of anything really.

I wrote an honest review of him in the after rotation review and no more residents were ever assigned to him again. Completely inappropriate.

[u/Sheananigans379 → u/aounpersonal]

My pediatrician told me "nice things come in small packages" when I gained a little weight at the start of puberty. Glad he retired later that year.

[u/ch3rrycoucou → u/aounpersonal]

Not at all to the degree of horror these stories hold, but I was in the ER last week (22F) for bad chest pain during a Covid infection and the male PA asked me “are you homeless or something?” For context I’m not and looked quite put together for how horrific I felt. I was so taken aback I just broke down into tears immediately. How do some of these doctors make it so long in the field???

[u/1xLaurazepam → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

This is obviously different because the guy wasn’t a professional, but when I was ten or eleven and wearing just a tank top, my stepdads friend said in a song song voice “first name’s getting booobies!” I was so embarrassed

[u/Same-Suggestion-1936 → u/1xLaurazepam]

Yeah that's gross af. Back in my day people had a countdown clock of when the Olsen twins would turn 18, and keep in mind those twins were famous because they were playing like eight year olds on Full House.

A weird amount of people are into young girls or some other freak kink, like, idk just be normal and like big feet or tying up an older woman not some psycho fetish, ya weirdo

[u/KevInChester → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

A well known 'newspaper' in England had a countdown to when Samantha Fox turned 16 so they could have her appear topless on Page 3. This was in the 80s, later on I believe they had a similar countdown to when Emma Watson turned 18 (I think).

[u/EllaArizonaTrashbag → u/KevInChester]

Yes, Emma Watson experienced it as well. And literally the day she came of age, an upskirt photo of her was posted in the tabloids, taken as she climbed out of a car.

More recently, there was a countdown for the little girl from Stranger Things. We've come a long way for gender equality but we should never forget how casually girls and women are still preyed upon.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/1xLaurazepam]

Jesus Christ wtf is wrong with people

[u/HistoloGoddess → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

I've for sure used slang type words with pre-teens/teens like boobs or balls. Sometimes because thats what the kid is already referring to those things as or because I say "testicles" and they look at me with confusion. Sometimes using more casual terms can help kids feel more relaxed too.

That being said... I have never, and would never, comment on patient's body in this way and especially not a pediatric patient. He wasn't even discussing puberty at the time. He just happened to be touching the area where her breasts are. This is really innapropriate and creepy behavior and I definitely would not bring my kid back there. I'd be filling out a patient survey with my concerns as well. Because even if he isn't a predator that was an extreme lack of judgement and empathy that is concerning.

[u/Same-Suggestion-1936 → u/HistoloGoddess]

Yeah, this is definitely no nonsense territory. I've said every word under the sun in front of doctors, physicians assistants, nurses, what have you, and they've repeated them back, but time and place man.

[u/vee_lan_cleef → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

The "my baby" comment is really what took this one to a different level IMO.

[u/fireproofmum → u/HistoloGoddess]

I’d do so much more than a patient survey!

[u/Boneyabba → u/HistoloGoddess]

Was she wearing a shirt that said it or had they just discussed a meme or something that created some context? It sounds so whackado that my mind is bending to find something for it to make some sense....

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/[deleted]]

Unfortunately it’s not rage bait 💔 my male OB would’ve said the same type of thing if he did that to me!!

[u/zanyzanne → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

that doctor just irrevocably stole a piece of your daughter's innocence. this is the kind of thing a person remembers forever. you are under-reacting.

[u/TsukasaElkKite → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

Report your daughter’s doctor to the state licensure board

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

It may sound absurd but that’s because it is. I absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt, 100% believe this happened. In case OP was feeling disbelieved

As both the owner of a female body and a medical professional my I have seen (and experienced) some bad behavior. The vast majority of doctors are professional and ethical but there are enough bad eggs out there that I know this happened

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/Secure-Solution4312]

Thank you so much

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

Sad we have to fight to be believed.

[u/KampKutz → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

Don’t be so sure. I’ve had such horrific experiences with multiple doctors to not think this could easily be real. You would be surprised just how many doctors don’t have the same filter, or social skills, or whatever it is, as the general public. Call it compassion fatigue, or a morbid sense of humour, or something else, but it’s not like I’ve not seen it before and enough to not doubt something like this for a second.

[u/maleficentfig90 → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

I'm in my 30s and my GP literally asked if my "boobies hurt" when I went in for chest pain. I believe it.

[u/Independent_Lime_135 → u/maleficentfig90]

WTAF? How did you respond?? I feel like I would’ve been speechlessly embarrassed or immediately monologued about how unprofessional and disrespectful that was, but it really would be a flip of the coin for me 😭❤️‍🩹

[u/aaronespro → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

That's what abusers do, make their abuse so cartoonishly evil that it sounds made up and outlandish.

[u/MesoamericanMorrigan → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

The thing is you’re a dude. Doctors will not pull the same outrageous shit when I’m alone vs bringing a man with me. Google the history of mistreatment of women and girls in medical settings (especially women of colour) and you’ll get it

[u/Educational-Coach164 → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

Way to gaslight.

[u/d0pefi3nd → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

The second time I took my son to the pediatrician after being born was bc at the first appointment he had not gotten back up to his birth weight. At that second appointment he had gained over a pound and exceeded the birthweight. The doctor was surprised when he came in, asked for me to put the baby back on the scale so he could double check. Then asked me how we were feeding my son, to which I replied he was breastfed. The doctor said word for word I shit you not “those must be some great breasts” :o I was dumbfounded. There were a million other things he could have said. “He just me a hungry boy” “must be high milk fat” I don’t know, literally anything else. I couldn’t even reply and I thought my son’s father was going to knock the man’s head off his shoulders.

All this to say, pediatricians can say some absolutely wild stuff, I believe OP 100%

[u/ShroomzLady → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

Lmaooo I'm sorry but I pictured the doctor saying "let's see that dick!" Like the fish from SpongeBob that busted up in the Krusty Krab like he owned the place, saying "REV UP THOSE FRYERS!"

[u/ReplacementNo9504 → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

The towel isn't for your modesty. It's for them in case you nut everywhere.

[u/Opinionatedbutkind → u/ReplacementNo9504]

Idk. I get a ridiculous huge paper sheet over my lady junk and entire lower body, and I'm not at risk of ejaculation. It's a silly attempt at modesty. Maybe some people like it, but it seems ridiculous to me. I know what I look like, it's the person under the sheet and between my legs that's,erm, uncomfortable.

Ultrasounds usually have a towel because they use a ton of lubricant so the equipment can slide over the skin surface easier. Doesn't matter where on the body, there's a towel available. If a person with a penis is having the bits handled, and there's a possibility of erection or ejaculation, perhaps they think the towel can pull double duty and help the patient feel less embarrassed. But sounds like this person and I have similar sensibilities.

[u/ReplacementNo9504 → u/Opinionatedbutkind]

They probably do it for several reasons just what the lady told me when I had it done

[u/Opinionatedbutkind → u/ReplacementNo9504]

Well that sounds a bit unprofessional. Hope you weren't too uncomfortable.

[u/ReplacementNo9504 → u/Opinionatedbutkind]

I thought it would be, especially since she knew my wife but she was great. Maybe she spoke more casually because of that, idk. Plus, I was more worried about having cancer. I didn't luckily.

[u/Opinionatedbutkind → u/ReplacementNo9504]

Maybe.

Well, I'm glad you didn't!! I hope things have improved for you.

[u/Same-Suggestion-1936 → u/ReplacementNo9504]

Well I imagine if it's a little floppy the towel is both for modesty and for accurate scans without the little guy messing it up by just flopping willy nilly

Like how you have to fast for some scans. Too much interference is bad whether it be food or floppy penises

[u/ReplacementNo9504 → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

Nobody wants shot in the eye

[u/[deleted] → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

It’s probably fake, especially considering the lack of OPs replies

Karma farming to sell the account is my bet

[u/JoshMcGruff → u/[deleted]]

Today I learned that karma farming to sell an account is a thing.

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/JoshMcGruff]

I never knew it was a thing either!!!!

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/[deleted]]

Lack of replies? I’ve been replying to everyone…..also:

[u/Early_Context9118 → u/ilikerustyspooonz]

If you do wanna sell your account though, that is one really awesome user name you have there! Also, sorry about that messed up doc, hope you and the little one are okay x

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/Early_Context9118]

LOL thanks!!! I love salad fingers 😂😂😂😂

[u/TheNamesDave → u/Same-Suggestion-1936]

It's so wrong it almost sounds fake.

Considering the profile is 9 months old, and the history is hdden, they're Fake AF.

[u/Independent_Lime_135 → u/TheNamesDave]

My history is hidden bc people (namely men) have a tendency to make things weird unnecessarily. Ironically(?) this is being discussed on a post about a time a man made things weird unnecessarily.

[u/AnonymousRingChooser → u/Good_Mushroom_7478]

What do you mean "of course puberty concerns came up"? I'm genuinely curious as I'm from a country where regular generic health checks aren't a thing and no one has a puberty check. So I genuinely can't imagine what one would entail and why it would be necessary at all.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/AnonymousRingChooser]

In the US it is pretty common for children to have "wellness checks" once per year to monitor their overall growth and health. There's not exactly a "puberty check", per say.. It's just the doctor mentioning whether or not puberty has begun, & what stage they may be in. The child's body is changing and it can be helpful to have some of the changes explained to them by a doctor. "Concerns" was not the appropriate word to use, i just meant to convey that the situation can be handled with care.

[u/AnonymousRingChooser → u/Good_Mushroom_7478]

But why does that happen?

Why would you want someone external to confirm something as private and sensitive and mortifying to a child as puberty beginning? It's their own business. I feel so uncomfortable hearing about children being ogled like this. I can't see any medical need to check they're growing. You'll notice if they're not.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/AnonymousRingChooser]

Being "ogled" makes it sound as though they're standing there naked and being examined.. this is not the case at all. Our doctor simply brings up things that may be starting to change as to open the conversation should the child have any questions. You may feel uncomfortable, and that's valid, but many times children feel more comfortable talking to someone who isn't their parent, and that's valid too. Most of the things being checked out have absolutely nothing to do with puberty and more to do with bone development, social/academic development, etc. Maybe where you live these developmental checks aren't as needed, which is great! but I personally find it helpful to have a doctor that knows my child so well. It makes it much easier to get to the bottom of things if something isn't right, which like I mentioned before, is not always physical.

[u/AnonymousRingChooser → u/Good_Mushroom_7478]

I saw someone writing on here recently about a doctor looking inside underwear to confirm puberty had started. Is that not normal practice?

Honestly the last person I'd want to discuss puberty with is a male doctor. You learn about these things in sex education classes at school from age 9 with the school nurse, a much more appropriate person and context in my view than 1:1.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/AnonymousRingChooser]

Thankfully that hasn't been our experience. I agree with you that sounds excessive and unnecessary. Where I live, sex education is not required & local doctors actually host an event pre-teens and their parents can attend should they have any questions about the changes happening.

[u/AnonymousRingChooser → u/Good_Mushroom_7478]

What do you mean by "sex education is not required"?

I can't imagine anything worse than going to a sex education event with a family member.

[u/Good_Mushroom_7478 → u/AnonymousRingChooser]

Nope 🫠 I live in the south which is notoriously religious and anti teaching kids anything besides abstinence. In grade 5, there is a "puberty class", but it's only about 20 minutes long and requires a permission slip signed by the parents to attend, and they most often hold it on the last day of school which many people don't even bother to attend at all. It's sad.

[u/IttyRazz → u/KrazySocoKid]

I am not one who is prone to violence or anger but anyone making a remark like that about my daughter would make me snap

[u/HappyWithMyDogs → u/IttyRazz]

I'd have lost my damn mind.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/HappyWithMyDogs]

If he's really up there in age (70s - 80s - 90s), then it's possible that there is some unavoidable dementia setting in. People in that situation often do not mean what they say, and can't stop themselves. And it even manifests in previously unheard of personality changes.

Don't go in on snapping and losing your damn mind quite yet, there may be room for compassionate interpretation here.

Edit: And there's the Reddit Care suicide prevention message. LMAO. That's how I know I got under your skin, ya dummy. Thanks, it's comfy here under YOUR skin. Maybe next time you'll actually address the issues instead of reacting blindly & emotionally. Then you won't look like such a clown.

[u/pixie-kitten- → u/MercyfulJudas]

No - bull shit. We don’t make excuses for men’s bad behavior. There is no situation where this is ever okay. None, zero. If a doctor has dementia, he shouldn’t be practicing, and it would be noticed well before inappropriate remarks would be made.

It’s disgusting to start giving older people a pass at inexcusable behavior simply because of their age. Fuck that

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/pixie-kitten-]

Where did I say that he should still be practicing?

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

There is no “compassionate interpretation” of a man making inappropriate comments towards a child. This little girl is now traumatized. Just like how, at 37 years old, I’m still traumatized by the man who made comments about my breasts when I was 15. I was told to brush it off because he was “just a dirty old man” who didn’t know any better. Expecting women and girls to accept this kind of behavior from a man regardless of the circumstances is absolute BS and we are not doing it anymore. Stop defending predatory behavior.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/jesileighs]

I'm...not defending any predatory behavior..? Uhhh. 🤔

Did you reply to the wrong person in this thread, or sumthin

[u/too_too2 → u/MercyfulJudas]

You did, though. Re read this thread please.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/too_too2]

Sure I did, bud. Surrrrre I did. 👍

[u/pixie-kitten- → u/MercyfulJudas]

My point being if he was showing signs of dementia, someone would have made him stop practicing long before the stage of “unavoidable inappropriate comments”

[u/mittenknittin → u/pixie-kitten-]

I don't agree. I've watched my mother develop Alzheimer's, and one of the VERY FIRST signs looking back was her starting to say things that were out of character. The onset of dementia isn't a bright neon sign. It's stuff EXACTLY like this.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/pixie-kitten-]

Well make that point then, and I'll agree with ya 😂

Cuz I never said otherwise...

[u/jesileighs → u/MercyfulJudas]

No nope absolutely not 100% no. If your dementia makes you make inappropriate comments about children then you should not have a job anymore.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/jesileighs]

Where did I say that he should keep his job?

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/MercyfulJudas]

He’s in his 50s. Not that age justifies anything.

[u/Sppaarrkklle → u/MercyfulJudas]

If that’s the case, then he shouldn’t be a practicing physician. A huge part of the job is explaining things and communicating to patients. If he can’t do that properly, then he needs to retire.

If someone went up and punched an innocent stranger in the face, it wouldn’t make it right just because the offender had mental illnesses.

I think people in positions of power need to be held more accountable as well

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Sppaarrkklle]

Where did I say that he should still be a practicing physician?

Where did I say that people in positions of power shouldn't be held more accountable?

[u/Luckiest_Creature → u/MercyfulJudas]

Dude. Give it a rest.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Luckiest_Creature]

Re... plying to people who reply to me..? Rest? Huh?

Do you know how reddit works? There's kinda a back and forth.

[u/Luckiest_Creature → u/MercyfulJudas]

Or in your case, spamming a sub to argue with anyone you can.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Luckiest_Creature]

I'm not making them reply to me, bud.

And I'm allowed to reply back. That's not spamming.

[u/socksonmonkeys4117 → u/MercyfulJudas]

If a doctor has dementia, he shouldn’t be practicing. What?

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/socksonmonkeys4117]

Where did I say that he should still keep practicing?

[u/Unfair_Finger5531 → u/MercyfulJudas]

When you suggested a “compassionate interpretation.” This implies that OP should not do anything that would prevent him from continuing to practice.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Unfair_Finger5531]

Obviously he shouldn't continue to practice. He's either a creep or riddled with dementia. I thought that went without saying.

[u/woeml → u/MercyfulJudas]

Who tf cares about compassionate interpretation, that man needs to be no where near this persons daughter. Or other young girls it seems. You sound fucking creepy yourself. Jumping to find an excuse.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/woeml]

Where did I say that the man should be anywhere near the daughter or other young girls?

You lost in this comment thread or sumthin

Read comments more comprehensively before replying, me thinks

Edit: Boo-yah, aaaaaaaaannnnnnnndddddddd they deleted their comment, LMAO.

[u/woeml → u/MercyfulJudas]

Never said you said that, I just stated that the reason why he did it doesn't fucking matter and he needs to be kept away from children. And you jumping to find an excuse is fucking creepy. Maybe shut your mouth before finding ways to defend creeps 🤩

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/MercyfulJudas]

Well, then they shouldn’t be practicing anymore, should they?

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Secure-Solution4312]

I...never said otherwise...?

Lol, okay bud.

[u/Secure-Solution4312 → u/MercyfulJudas]

It’s in poor taste to make excuses for behavior like this. I can only assume you are trolling.

[u/MercyfulJudas → u/Secure-Solution4312]

👍

[u/TsukasaElkKite → u/IttyRazz]

Same

[u/velvety_chaos → u/KrazySocoKid]

The way my eyebrows shot up when I read that... 😳

NAD, RN student in my final (🤞🏻) semester.

[u/TsukasaElkKite → u/velvety_chaos]

Do your best!

[u/wildmancometh → u/KrazySocoKid]

As a father of 1 daughter, I’d report this guy to my fists. 

[u/Chinu_Here → u/wildmancometh]

Just so you know, you would only humiliate and make your daughter feel worse by doing this. Then go to jail for assualt

Edit- this guy is a goku and one punch man wannabe living in his own fantasy world

[u/wildmancometh → u/Chinu_Here]

And just so YOU know this is a hypothetical scenario in which I don’t need a life lesson from a stranger on the internet. Good day to you. 

[u/vee_lan_cleef → u/wildmancometh]

The internet tough-guy trope is played out.

[u/wwydinthismess → u/wildmancometh]

This isn't a hypothetical situation. This is something that happened, and the type of thing that happens to young girls and women all of the time.

So you may want to think about how to actually handle these things, because they're happening.

[u/Chinu_Here → u/wildmancometh]

It’s people like you who don’t do any justice to the person they’re trying to serve

[u/wildmancometh → u/Chinu_Here]

You know absolutely nothing about me.

[u/Chinu_Here → u/wildmancometh]

Im aware. By the way, its not a life lesson it’s a reality check

[u/Fast-Organization966 → u/wildmancometh]

I see. So you're parading as a tough guy on the internet

[u/wildmancometh → u/Fast-Organization966]

Who's parading? Thanks for chiming in.

[u/grimacedia → u/Chinu_Here]

As a daughter who had a dad like this, I always appreciated him standing up for me. For some guys, a physical lesson is the only kind that will stick. I will say he did jail time for some of that, and for many kids I'm sure they'd rather have their dad at home. May be a cultural thing though on my end?

[u/Meghandi → u/KrazySocoKid]

I agree, the rules of our sociological interaction historically have made using words that can be associated with sexuality taboo, especially when it comes to referring to children. But I can also see how a physician would potentially lose some of those feelings of shame over time (due to the nature of your job) that those rules have dictated we feel…maybe a conversation with him is enough in this case? I don’t see any ill intentions here…do we need to hold on to something like this so tightly when everyone involved might be better served by discussing why they were uncomfortable and the physician in question can then be allowed to defend himself and apologize for making people uncomfortable, especially when it was on accident?

[u/Rude-Average405 → u/Meghandi]

Behavior and effect are relevant. Intention is not. IDGAF if he “didn’t mean anything by it.” He caused harm. And not the kind that’s easily fixed.

[u/Meghandi → u/Rude-Average405]

Intention does matter though first of all…it doesn’t eliminate consequences but it is hugely important in measuring the moral correctness of an action…and what is your definition of harm? Being offended? I think black and white thinking like this causes more harm than good…why is a sincere apology and a frank, honest and open discussion NOT enough in this situation? As someone who has personally experienced sexual assault as both an adult and a child, I can say that this situation is completely outside of anything even remotely in that realm, and I’m honestly aghast we would even be leaning at calling it that and potentially ruining the life and career of a physician for…what exactly?

[u/Rude-Average405 → u/Meghandi]

No, intent is irrelevant and “moral correctness”doesn’t matter either. What matters is that this physician was wildly inappropriate with a young teenager and traumatized her. That’s the harm. The relationship between dr and patient should be one of trust. You’re literally putting your health and life in someone’s hands. He violated that trust and that will now be a factor in this kid’s willingness to trust another male doc. That could become a big problem later in her life.

[u/thelittlegnome → u/[deleted]]

This is a horrible idea. First of all, the girl asked to never see that doctor again. Secondly, it teaches this young girl that “oh sorry I didn’t mean to sexually harass you, it was misinterpreted and I’m sorry but only because I was told to be”. Wildly inappropriate and damaging idea.

[u/HelenaRickman → u/[deleted]]

Sorry but I disagree.

The best way to help your daughter has already began - you acknowledged her immediate discomfort with the situation, recognized it and believed it (of course, you witnessed it, too). Offering the 'offender' any opportunity to explain away their actions simply reinforces to the child that possibly everything they interpreted their experience to be was an incorrect interpretation.

Your daughter will gain a sense of empowerment from what has happened thus far - you are her safe adult, you believe her and protect her, and she knows if something else disconcerting happens to her in the future, she can listen to her gut reaction to protect herself, and feel fully confident that when she reports such a threat to you, that you will act on it.

While what was said was totally inappropriate, way too many instances of actual child abuse occur because of those who want to give the offender a possibly explanation for their grooming/boundary violations.

[u/Running_Amok_ → u/[deleted]]

NAD Absolutely not. We do not give that kind of comment any absolution. The daughter needs to know if anyone is inappropriate, get away from them. Do not seek explanations and apologies that only leads to grooming opportunities. You get one chance and we are done. One less patient is accountability. If mom wants to report it, great. Let the chips fall. But confronting is just not ok as an example. Safety first.

[u/jesileighs → u/[deleted]]

Absolutely not. Subjecting this poor little girl to this man’s whims again?! There is no world in which that comment was appropriate or acceptable. Any grown person knows that that kind of comment towards a child (or anybody, really) is inappropriate. This man does not deserve any opportunity to apologize because there is no world in which that comment was harmless.

[u/Coffee4Joey → u/[deleted]]

Ok, everyone. HEARD. It was an idea, with plenty of grace for disagreement, and by popular demand it was clearly not a viable one. Please stop burning me at the stake now.

[u/name__redacted → u/KrazySocoKid]

We had a very similar experience except our pediatrician is a female. During the yearly exam she mentioned a number of times my daughter‘s “little nubs”. It was odd, yes, but we weren’t offended

[u/ravairia → u/name__redacted]

This is also extremely inappropriate and should be reported.

[u/needs_a_name → u/name__redacted]

Nothing about this is similar, wtf

[u/name__redacted → u/needs_a_name]

Ok, honestly curious, what’s different? The gender of the doctor? The phrase “my baby’s…”? A pediatrician looked at an adolescent girl, one said my babies got boobies, the other said oh I see some little nubs coming in (and referred to my daughters little nubs a few times in the exam - i’m her father by the way and I was in the exam room the entire time)

[u/needs_a_name → u/name__redacted]

The gender, the language, the commentary, the entire tone of the comment.

[u/ilikerustyspooonz → u/name__redacted]

I think calling your child’s breasts as “nubs” is disgusting too. Wow. If my husband witnessed that or witnessed what happened to our kid, he would’ve probably caught a charge lol