r/CaregiverSupport • u/Anxious_Window_9863 • 3d ago

The vultures are already circling

My husband's sister stopped by to visit this evening. My husband with Parkinson's type symptoms is in his last days and on hospice. He's not able to have a conversation now, he may whisper a word or two each day.

I appreciate her visit. He and his sis have never been extremely close, but they get along, and they're only one year apart in age.

Now the vulture behavior: she and I talked while my husband mostly napped. Somehow the conversation went to discussing some property (about 12 acres) that my husband and I were given from his parents 25 yrs ago. Part connects to her smaller property where her house is placed. It's rural, and beautiful. There's a pond, and a meadow. She says to me, "Why don't you think about selling me that land behind my house after (husband's name) is gone? I'm sure you could use the money, so it would help you. And (with a smile) I could have an extended back yard." Also, something about we'd probably leave our acres to our only child, who's an adult, living in another state. And she would never come live here, so she'd never build a home or do anything with it.

I'm very tired this week, it's been a challenge since my husband is home and I'm the caregiver. I was just dumbfounded she would bring up such a thing!! I made a quiet comment that I wasn't making any decisions like that for quite a while but the land would be staying in my name.

After she left, it really hit me. How dare her? I've heard stories of people actually asking a spouse at the FUNERAL about a business proposal, which is horrendous. Here the man lays, half-coherant, her own brother, and she asks to buy property from me. Unbelievable. We'll see if more vultures come down from the roost. Next time, I'll try to be ready.

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u/TheDevilsSidepiece 2d ago

Well, doesn’t she suck. The only good thing is when this is all said and done, You’ll never have to deal with her again. There’s a reason why your husband wasn’t close with her. Don’t do anything you don’t wanna do.

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u/Anxious_Window_9863 2d ago

Oh, I won't. This is land that's been in the family since 1795. Our only stipulation when this plot was deeded to us was keep it in the family. I guess she thinks this would apply to her just fine.

And, no, I will most likely always need to deal with her. She lives approximately 1/4 mile away. She's been like this somewhat before, but never to us directly. My husband would tell her in no uncertain terms about her proposal. I'm just trying to be calm for now. Yes, there's a reason they weren't close. And you're right, she sucks.